Nine years post op!

 

Greetings everyone, I just received an email from the OH website reminding me that it was my anniversary of joining this site.  That kind of hit me all at once. It is so hard to believe that it is been nine years since my surgery!  I've always said that having weight-loss surgery is an absolute last resort. If there is any way  you can manage your diet your nutrition your health by normal means, then that would be the best option. That being said, I am so grateful that I made the decision. If you read my past blogs you'll see that nine years ago and even longer than that 15 years ago my life was in utter chaos!  Alcohol, food, and many other things served as substitutes for my lack of self-worth and my shame.  

13 years and 44 days ago I had a spiritual awakening! God came into my life and took away my craving for alcohol. Since that day in the year 2000 I have not had even the slightest hint of a need to use alcohol or any other chemical to solve my problems!  Nine years and two days ago Dr. chute and Dr. Drew at Abbott Northwestern Hospital helped me to remove food as a coping mechanism for my problems!  And a few years ago with the help of my sponsor and some very special people in my life, I learned what a codependent unhealthy relationship can do to you!  And I'm proud to say that I am more happy joyous and free today than I have been at any point in my life!  And I'm willing to bet that in a year or two I will be writing another post that says the same thing as life continues to get better every single day!!!  Now, while I have not had any Alcohol or drugs nor have I have the desire for any since March 21 of 2000, The food has been a struggle at times... The first two years after surgery were very simple I couldn't eat anything except the very softest and highest protein foods. There simply wasn't a choice if I cheated I threw up. And I am grateful for that because I was able to get down to 197 pounds before my first year was up.  I maintained that weight for quite some time, however as many of you out there know there are ways to cheat. I started taking sugar in small doses, started having higher fat foods in smaller quantities more often, and eventually because of not being in the right mental frame of mind, I started putting weight back on.  In late December 2011, my scale read 298 pounds. I was devastated! But I decided it was time to make a change.  And surprisingly, it was very simple. I followed the pouch rules and stopped eating sugar!  By October I was back down to 195 pounds, and have maintained a stable 205 pounds or less since then!  

The latest lesson that I learned, was very simple.  I have always been the kind of person that doesn't want to hurt somebody's feelings. So when I found  myself in a disastrous relationship, rather than stand up for myself make a decision and make a change in my life I allowed that person to hang on for approximately 5 years after I knew that it was absolutely the wrong relationship... I felt absolutely miserable, I withdrew from my friends, from my family, and once again found the need to fill that void and I chose food.  When I finally stood up for myself, ended that relationship, and started to find myself again, I realized that I'm a really good person! And then I started to become really fun again, and life has changed in such miraculous ways I find myself in awe!!!!  

So, if you find yourself in a relationship with an alcoholic, a drug addict, or a generally codependent ,  miserable person who drags you down every single day, end it now! Do not hold on, it does not make it better, and it doesn't get easier by putting it off  and waiting for "the right time"!  I have come to found out that I am one of the rare exceptions. I have tried to help literally hundreds of people overcome their alcohol and drug addictions. 99% of them fail. They end up in jail, they end up in treatment center after treatment center, or they end up dead.  Or they simply remain living day after day waking up,working, and drinking until they pass out and then doing it all over again while destroying everybody in their path... They will tell lies about you to your coworkers and your friends. They will cheat on you, they will lie to you sometimes even seeming like they believe their lies, and they will rob you blind, not only of material possessions but of your very sanity.... Those of us who have dealt with a lifetime of being overweight, and living with the shame that that causes, need to understand that we have to take care of ourselves first!  And when we can come to love ourselves, then hopefully we will find our purpose in life, And enjoy the rewards that the good Lord had intended for us the whole time!!!

Well I should sign off now, but I wanted to say hi and let everyone know that life can be amazing, that all of our cravings, and all of our addictions, and all of our pain can go away permanently, one day at a time if we just Keep on doing the next best right thing!!!  Peace and blessings to all!!

To new frontiers!

554/197/200

357 pounds gone forever!!!

 

Great story and accomplishment. Thing I admired most about your posting is that you never seemed to give up and fully used support systems to overcome your challenges.   Way to go!  You should be proud of all that you have overcome.    Wishing you continued health and happiness!

Wow, simply thank you. My ex of 4 months passed away last Saturday. It really has been a hard week of questions. I know I had to leave as it was destroying me. Your post again reinforces that he made his choices and whether I stayed or not, it was his choice. Best of luck to you! You have a great outlook and I know this is my chance to find my happiness.

Sherry

I am 20 years clean and sober from drugs. It was a hard road and one that I didn't fully understand as I substituted food for the drugs which lead me to being MO. When I had my surgery last year I went to therapy to find other ways to face my demons so I wouldn't again substitute one addiction for another. Relationships can be an addiction as well. There is a great book I recommend to anyone with codependent tendancies, "Is it love or is it addiction?" It really opened my eyes years ago to the relationships I was choosing. The hardest thing for me was/is allowing me to put myself first. My therapist helped me to learn that if I don't put myself first and take care of me there is no way I can take care of someone else.

I wish you continued success and happiness, and I wish for you the joy of true relationships that don't cost you yourself, but instead contribute to the person you've become.

It is really nice to be able to post something on the OH forum, and have people reply who know exactly what you're feeling and thinking!  Thank you for your replies, I will check out that book, and I wish you all the miracles that are waiting for us. Blessings to everyone!

I was married to an alcoholic for 40 years and did not realize that I was co-dependant until after he died and I found myself in a relationship where I as exhibiting the same behaviors.  I went to Al-Anon and also got help from a therapist. One of the things that she asked me was what I was getting out of the relationship.  I could not answer that question.  It still took me over a year to finally say No to him.  That was last Wednesday.  I am praying for strength to remain firm.  Yesterday I attended my first Al-Anon meeting in over a year. 

Your post spoke directly to my heart this morning.  Thank you for sharing.

CONGRATULATIONS ... what an awesome journey despite all the challenges ... thanks for paying it forward ... it is an awesome story of empowerment, overcoming, understanding, starting over and succeeding by never giving up and sharing ... I am soooooooooooooo inspired.  Congratulations on 9 years of getting stronger in all aspects of your life ... congratulations on your awesome weight loss journey and more than all congratulations on taking your life back... let no hindering spirit get in the way of that again... I wish you continued success and nothing but the best on your continued journey... ....

Thank you again everybody! Sharing our combined experience, pain and our joys is what keeps me on the straight path! And if our stories can help each other then we need to tell them!