Feeling Alone with Little Support PrOp Surgery Monday

I wonder if anyone else has gone through this. My surgery is scheduled for Monday and I am very excited but now the nerves are setting in!! A major reason why I joined this forum is because I literally have ZERO support from the selected people that know about my surgery. My immediate family and boyfriend are 100% against my decision to have WLS! I am a very strong person however my nerves are really setting in for Monday and I feel like I have no one to support me at all. Even with all of the information I've shared with my family and boyfriend they still disagree that WLS is necessary and safe. ----I come from a very "green" family. I have gone to every single appointment by myself and have reached out to them to join me for more information. They are so against this, they want no part of it. I am really nervous that I will not have the support I need postop during all of the intense changes that I will be going through. I'm actually feeling like my recovery is going to be a hassle to everyone and I don't want to burden anyone. 

My BMI is 38, I have always been heavy even when I was a little girl. I even played college sports and I was still on the overweight/obese side. My health has gotten a lot worse over the last couple of years

-Hiatal Hernia

-Pre diabetic

-Severe acid reflux

-Barretts esophagus 

-Sleep apnea

-Shoulder strain

-Derm problems

-Fatty Liver disease

I have tried and tried dieting. I even had a personal trainer for some time. I would lose the weight but 6 months later I would gain all of it back and more. WLS was not an easy decision initially however my father, who is no longer with us fought a long hard battle with obesity. He died when I was a teenager of complications from diabetes which were uncontrollable. 

This decision is right for ME but I'm having a difficult time convincing the ones I love around me of that! They've even talked amongst themselves to convince me this is not safe. I'm really worried I will have no support when I need them most after surgery. Has anyone else gone through this? Any suggestions!???!

You can do this.  You are doing this for your health and if your family cant understand that then shame on them.  OH has been a huge support system for me.  I had surgery 10 days ago and I am back at work feeling amazing.  We are here for you.  Being nervous is so normal prior to surgery.  I was a nervous wreck.  I am so glad I had the surgery.  I stopped my diabetes meds and I have been testing at around 112 everyday so pretty much kicked diabetes in the but already.  Good luch on Monday , YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!

This is something you need to do for you.  Your family may not agree but if they refuse to help you in any way, then shame on them.  As for the boyfriend..... He may not agree with your decision, but if he also refuses to help, then you may want to rethink that relationship.  Sorry to sound harsh, but I have arrived at the stage of my life where I realize life is too short and I want to surround myself with people who support me because they love me, not because they necessarily agree with me.  Good luck on Monday....you will be so glad you did this and you will be a stronger person for it.  Let us know how you are doing.

I am really glad you posted this because it's probably what I needed to hear. Thank you

I totally agree with the above post. My family and boyfriend didn't necessarily understand the surgery, but they have gone out of their way to educate themselves about it. And now they all support me 100%. You deserve the same! I haven't had the surgery yet, I'm scheduled for early July, but I would love to hear how you make out! You have so many people on OH to support you!!! Good luck!

Thank you for your kind words!!! It's good to know there are people out there like you! Congrats on your success, your inspiration gives me a lot of hope!  

Is there a chance what comes across as zero support could possibly be hidden worry, fear of the unknown, and guarded preservation of their own feelings?  In pre-op classes, we were told a support system is important; maybe you will have to make this website your support system?  Once your loved ones see positive changes in you, maybe they'll become more positive, too.  My suggestion:  To thine own self be true.

Before I started researching this surgery I was very skeptical and worried also. Sometimes lack of information is what creates the fear. Although my family was supportive, they were also very worried and didn't want me to go thru with it. If you have made your decision, you just need to go for it and show them how much healthier and happier your life is post surgery. Please continue to use this forum for your immediate support. It really helps! I was nervous and second guessed my decision to have this surgery, and actually almost cancelled at the last minute. Now I am so grateful for the life I have and decision I made to improve my own health and happiness. I am retiring in July and can't wait to spend more time with my 5 grand kids, knowing that I can keep up with them. Instead of sitting on the sidelines watching them, I and involved. We bike, skate, hula hoop, walk, swim and just have fun. You got this. We're here to help you! HUGS

I'm noticing a lot of positive energy around here and you know what... I like it!! Congrats on reaching your goals! I'm so happy that you're able to be so active with your grand kids!! Wow! Keep it up! You are very inspiring to me!