Feeling defeated.

A couple months after my initial consult, the endocrinologist put me on Topomox to help with my sugar addiction.  For the first time I could remember, I felt a freedom that I had never known.   Sugar cravings no longer ruled my day and weight loss became much easier.  In fact, I lost most of my appetite all together.  That was at the beginning of the year.  I am now 7 months post VSG surgery and the last 6 weeks have been so hard.  My appetite has returned (which the endocrinologist warned me happens to many patients 5-7 months post surgery) and the sugar cravings are back.  I'd be lying if I said I hadn't been cheating.  It started with a piece of chocolate here or there or an extra slice of cheese now and then.  The scale was still going down, so I could justify it as being ok in my head.  Now I'm eating a couple of pieces of chocolate every night and ate cheese and crackers the other night a couple hours after dinner after the kids had gone to bed. 

I WAS SNEAKING FOOD AFTER THE KIDS HAD GONE TO BED.  Ugh.  This is a very dangerous slippery slope for me and I know better, but "Just say no" is just lip-service.  I feel like I'm standing on the edge of the cliff and the abyss of failure is in front of me.  I don't want to go back to my old ways.  It's just so hard to reign it back in. 

I can't be the only one, right?  There has to be other's who have fallen off the wagon a bit and turned it around again?  Someone tell me there's hope, please.  I could use a little right now.

This is the hardest time of the year.  I know there are some great reset programs out there to help you start fresh again and to maybe reset your mind by looking at your tools in your tool box.....

What helped you at the start of your journey?  Did you have any help from a clinic that you can fall back onto reading?

Look into what makes you happy?  what hobbies do you have that make you happy?  That can keep your hands and mind busy?  Knitting, scrapbooking, walking with a buddy.

I LOVE making home made cards from Stampin Up products.  I make cards to make me happy and in turn, giving them away makes others happy.

Here are some points to help with mindful eating.

You learn to pay attention to:

• Why you feel like eating, and what emotions or needs might be triggering the eating.
• What you're eating, and whether it is healthy or not.
• The look, smell, taste, feel of the food you're eating.
• How it makes you feel as you taste it, as you digest it, and throughout the day.
• How full (or sated) you are before, during and after eating.
• Your emotions during and after eating.
• Where the food came from, who might have grown it, how much it might have suffered before it was killed, whether it was grown organically, how much it was processed, how much it was fried or overcooked, etc.

This is a skill, a form of meditation really, that you don't just acquire overnight. It takes practice, and there will be times when you forget to eat mindfully, and there will be starts and stops. But with practice and attention, you can become very good at this.

Hope this helps.

Out_Going_One

First, keep things in perspective. You are talking about 100 or 200 calories here and there, and it is not the end of the world. I would strongly encourage you to address the "all or nothing" type mentality or in other words have to be perfect at this. Mindful, consistent, absolutely. I am not saying eat crap daily because it is not a problem. I am saying that most all of us occasionally have poor choices. There are two paths from there, one leads back to weight gain and the other one leads to developing the skills to crawl back on the wagon. You can choose the path. I can relate to struggling at night, as that is always my downfall. I moved my exercise regiment to the evenings and that took care of most of the issue for me. You can do this. 

Food addiction is tough and it doesn't just go away.  I am figthing it with all I've got.  

Some things that have helped me:

• Therapy
• OA
• Coloring
• Taking a walk
• Finding things to do outside of my food routine -- I found watching TV in the living room by myself led to me eating when I shouldn't.  So now I don't do that anymore.  I watch in my room, or sit in my husband's office with him -- anything else. 

It's super hard but you need to do something different.  Saying just don't do it doesn't work.  I know!

Lets face it- if we could do moderation - we would not need WLS. 

Every Time I introduce sweets and carbs into my diet - I gain weight.  For me to lose or maintain - I need very low carb diet - no grains of any kind, no sweets, no dairy that has any sugar, and very limited fruits.  

some people can do 100 cal her and there - but for me - I can't. I am addicted to sugar.  I carve it. The more I have it - the more I crave it. 

the only way for me is no sweets and no grains (like crackers).  Right now I am trying to gain some weight I lost after my PS surgery.. I am slowly gaining..I introduced more fruits, sweet potato, winter squash... Even those theoretically "safe - complex carbs" and not a lot of them - allow me to gain some weight, even on  rather relatively low calorie diet (1600 ). 

You can get back on track. Take a deep breathe....read what you just wrote and move forward. It's not easy. We all got ourselves into obesity but we can get out even if we need a little help from our friends. Don't give up. We're all here rooting for you!