A Good Day - A Glimmer of Hope

Sep 29, 2014

This morning I woke up depressed which happens fairly often, unfortunately, but two significant things happened today -- actually three.  First, I remember my dad telling me that whenever I get depressed to "put legs on [my] depression."  So after drinking a protein shake and a cup of coffee, I put on my cute Asics and went walking.  I live in the country which is very hilly so climbing and descending felt good on my hips and legs.  Second, I was able to maintain the same pace going up and down the hills.  I didn't slow down and that is a big accomplishment for me because it means that my daily walks are paying off!  Third, I was able to stay almost within calorie range.  I had set my range from 800-1200 calories with a minimum of 45 grams of protein  and I went slightly over by 20 calories but I got in over 60 grams of protein.  As for my weight, nothing has changed.  I still weigh the same, but I think that as I continue to exercise and watch my diet, I can lose the weight.  The worst that can happen is that I weigh the same but feel better.  At my age, feeling good is as important as looking good. 

I dug out my old "Overeaters Anonymous" book to revisit the steps.  After reading the first three chapters, I noticed one major flaw in my weight loss is that  I forgot that I am a food addict.  Diets and surgery won't change the way I think and it won't stop my compulsive eating.  I need a Higher Power to help me.  I need God as I understand Him and more importantly, I need to trust He will help me.  So often He was left out this weight loss/ healthy lifestyle I had to adopt,  not because He was unwilling to help me, but because I was unwilling to listen.  If I want to end this life of weight gain madness, I have to include God in my decisions and plans.  I have to let Him direct me or I am doomed to fail again.

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