Doing some research

Nov 27, 2010

Just starting out with a bit of research. I've got a seminar to attend on 12/1 with the doctor my doctor referred me to. I'll be interested to hear what they talk about and what information the nutritionist will have available.

I never actually tried a "diet" per se. I did a couple of years in OA which changed my food addiction patterns radically. I've also done enough therapy to know that food cannot replace a mother's love, blah blah blah. I know that now I'm most likely to overeat when I'm tired and I occasionally struggle during PMS time, but self-knowledge does actually avail us something sometimes and I have cut out the salt & vinegar chips and am down to one small bag of Cheetos.

I've never been thin without an astromonical amount of work and/or starvation. As I age I know that is not going to get any easier and may, in fact, now be impossible.

Of course part of me wants to wear a size 12 and shop in the real petites, not the fat petites. Mostly I want this so I'm not carrying around two of me. My joints hurt - I can feel my hips and knees wanting to go. I don't want to be that fat old lady in the mumu with a walker. Totally don't want that.

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