Weight loss, Divorce, Regain Re-Loss.... Moving on

Nov 04, 2014

Boy oh boy where do I start? so much has happened since I took my fist steps into the WLS ring... that was 11/14/2002. I had decent success... weight came off fast went from 277 to 150 with in 14 months then I fucked it up with help from a malfunctioning pouch and an un suportive partner... i'll give you a hint the soon to be ex... took me years of yo yo dieting in between to get up enough balls to seek out another surgeon. I did... Dr. David Buchin.. I was shocked when he made me take classes so to speak in educating me in the weight loss process... you see I had already did this shit I knew what I was doing... WRONG!!! I did everything wrong... how else could I have regained to 240+ lbs...?? I learned about protein first... no drinking before or after meals 30 min rule.... exercise a must.. and what types of exercise... I also learned everyone is different and that is a great thing... My body type is a muscular type my BMI will always be higher so I on paper may appear overweight but in person I am smaller... I had my revision 3/30/11... was wheeled into surgery at a cool 220 lbs.... I was walking laps a few hours after surgery... this time I wasn't going to fuck anything up.... I swore to my kids... like an addict... I got this... the weight came off... slow at first...remember I am a revision... then I exercised... the weight stalled but I shrunk... holy crap I got tiny size 10 at 170 lbs.. to size 6 at 150 lbs ... who at 5ft nothing ... and 150 lbs is slender?? me that's who... by 1 year out I decided I need play time was fed up with the husband who thought I was no longer attractive because I was too skinny?? really?? saggy skin everywhere... no boobs... that's skinny? mind you I see FAT!!! I started to go out with the ladies from my support group ( wls) and we drank... quick drunk... men noticed me... when I was home I was super mom.... PTA president, running a 5k, working out, football practice, karate, school plays, cleaning, cooking, laundry... etc... yet been over a year since my husband even looked at me like I was a woman.. yet I am feeling more and more sexual... so I did what anyone who never had the "attention" before did... I started to go out... and I met someone... started sleeping on the couch still working out 6 days a week playing super mom... going out at night after kids are asleep... notice bad habits creeping up.... by 2012 April ... I met "R" I told my hubby I want out... he was like we are fine you gain weight back and you can come back t our bed... NOT happening... little did I know I was heading down that road.... In August I left everything I knew took my 3 kids moved out of my home of 15 years moved in with my parents.... got 2 jobs and now I am a single parent.... HOLY HELL.... now my cushy life of the gym 6 days a week.... no worries of cash all gone ... poof.... now I am back in my parents house.. can you say STRESS????????? now no restrictions on food... alcohol... no hiding... slowly my weight starts to creep back on... 5, 10, 20, 30.... before I realized it it ... I exchanged my size 6's for size 12's... then 14's... then 16's... then 18's.. then.. I opened my eyes saying WTF am I doing now it is 2014... march.. I work as a catering coordinator for Panera Bread... love my Job... so I am NOT giving it up... but I decided to give up the food.... I sneak and skulk on Dr B's FB private web page someone mentioned Insurenetrition... free protein shakes for post op patients... I said WTF lets try.... im still insured by ex... since divorce is taking forever..... HOLY crap DR. B wrote prescription... insurance approved it .. now I get 4 cases every 6 weeks free of charge. and so started my journey back again.... in May I got sick...figured I was sick since I ballooned back up to 225lbs.... turns out it was my Gallbladder.... Dr B took it out... crappy recovery... he since put me on Qysemia... and now I am presently at 165lbs.... my new goal is 131.... :)

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