Question:
I need opinions here......
Recently, at a support group meeting that I attend (not LIPO...my group), someone was asked not to return to the meeting and to seek psychiatric help by the RN and a social worker who run the group. When he questioned why, he was not given a specific example but told that several people have complained about his behavior. Last Saturday, a few concerned members spoke up about the situation and were not given any specific info. Pre-surgery (and for some of us post-surgery as well)have witnessed first hand how people are discriminated against with regards to our weight. In my book, this acts hand in hand with that and it is unacceptable. Apparently, something has been said to make the management of the group feel that our buddy is a threat to the group. Such use of "hearsay evidence" in court is generally not allowed and in my opinion should not be allowed in this instance as well. Additionally, as many noted at the last meeting, this may be extremely detrimental for him. The fact is that this has given numerous people from the Good Sam meeting a "bad taste" in their mouths. Sadly, I believe this will hurt the continued future success of this meeting and location. We (the weight loss surgery patients) are the success stories and help that meeting survive. I desperately believe in group support and hope and pray that this incident does not stop people from attending meetings, but to find one that better suits their needs. Please feel free to share your thoughts on this subject. — Maryellen R. (posted on August 26, 2009)
August 26, 2009
I've never heard of a Good Sam meeting, but here's how the situation
sounds. Legally they probably can't get very specific in talking to the
group about what happened. But it is probably unlikely they would dismiss
someone without reason, and they were probably protecting the people who
complained from further problems. If the meeting is good otherwise, I
would accept that we're all imperfect and forgive them if they were wrong.
— Janell C.
August 26, 2009
hmm...that's disturbing!
— lesleigh07
August 26, 2009
I hope I'm wrong but it seems that someone was setting themselves judge,
jury, and prosecuting attorney.
— Kathleen W.
August 26, 2009
Your not asking a specific question and the details provided are full of
suppositions, so I would take for granted that the Registered Nurse and
Social Worker are looking out for the best interests of the group. If you
do not know any more info on the details then I would proceed as if they
did the right thing.
Undoubtedly they can't talk about the situation with you due to HIPAA,
however they are licensed professionals, so therefore I would assume they
did the right thing.
— Joseph Johnson
August 27, 2009
I agree with Joseph and Janell. The RN and LSW are professionals whose job
is the well being of the group. Plus because of HIPPA laws they can not
divulge anything. If you still feel your friend was discriminated against
maybe you can approach the group about getting a mediator to work with your
group and your friend.
— Muggs
August 27, 2009
Intresting...I think there are several issues at play here. One may be the
new HIPPA laws. Meaning the leaders of the group can not disclose the
details to the rest of the group. The other may be that this person suffers
form some type of mental illness that may be placing the members of the
group at risk. Perhaps the leaders need to address this in short detail and
then move on.
— chell1957
August 27, 2009
Greetings Maryellen: You need to back off and let the leaders be the
leaders and try not to second-guess their hard-thought actions. I'm sure
they agonized over their decision long and hard, seeking direction from OH
and other avenues open to them before they took this step asking this
person not to return to the meeting. In fact, this very subject was
discussed at the last leader roundtable, where an individual was seeking
direction on what course of action is permissible when that leader finds
one or more people to have disruptive behaviors detrimental to the health
and wellbeing of the group. It was brought out at the meeting that
sometimes it is very necessary to ask a person to not attend any more
support group meetings run by a particular leader. The RN and social
worker are in charge. Their focus is for the health and well-being of the
group. Sometimes leaders need to make hard decisions for the health and
well-being of the group in general. I know you feel passionately about
this; but, you are not walking in the shoes of the leader. Your writing
about this alleged injustice simply fosters unrest. Since you do feel so
passionately, why don't you take the steps necessary to become a support
group leader. In fact, you could reach out to this person and work with
him to get your own support group going. Then, you will recognize that
leaders sometimes have to make uncomfortable decisions for the health and
wellbeing of their group. No one asks for anyone to not attend any support
group without just cause. The leaders recognize the downfall of having to
ask anyone to leave because they truly know the challenges they face in
getting a support group to thrive.
Christine Gibson, MS, MA
Bariatric University Support Group Coach
OH Support Group Coach
OH Support Group Leader
— Christine Gibson
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