Question:
Can I salvage a decent weight loss after screwing up big time?
I had an Open RNY the middle of August. Between August and February I lost 80 pounds, but have not lost anything since then. I am dealing with my elderly parents. My father is end the final stages of a degenerative brain disease and my mother, who is his primary caregiver, is dealing with COPD and agina. I realize I have been grazing to deal with the stress and to comfort myself. I am working very hard to get my diet and exercise back on course, but I am afraid that I have done too much damage to be successful at reaching a normal body weight (I still weigh 290 pounds.) I am so depressed these days that it is all I can do to get to work each day. — [Anonymous] (posted on May 29, 2001)
May 29, 2001
hello---- I'm still pre-op and deal with emotional eating alot. my
suggestion would be to call a therapist to help with depression and all
your problems, and someone to vent on. I'm sorry about your family
situation, and i hope everything gets better. Good luck to you... If you
need anyone to talk to or want to vent and get all your problems out....
email me...I would love to help...thats what i'm going to school for...
— kiara26
May 29, 2001
Please don't look at yourself as a failure. This is just a set back. If you
wouldn't have had WLS you probable would have gain all your lost weight
back, plus some. I know of someone on this site that jumped started her
weight loss after many many months on a plateau her name is Anita
Wilson-Taylor, from Mobile,Alabama. I am cure she has some good and wise
info.Good Luck and God Bless you and your family. Our bodies do all sorts
of things to hold onto the fat for security, both mentally, and physically.
--
— CohenHeart
May 29, 2001
Don't forget you still have your "pouch-tool." If you stop
grazing and resume weight-loss-friendly behaviors, you will lose weight.
Try this: no milk, no sugar, no grazing, no drinking with meals. 60+ gm
protein, 60+ oz of water, 60+ minutes physical activity every day, as well
as a good multi vitamin/mineral supplement and at least 1500 mg calcium
citrate. The window of opportunity is not absolute. Good luck.
— Linda B.
May 30, 2001
Looking on the bright side - you have not gained any weight even with less
than ideal eating habits. I suspect you have not done any damage except
maybe to have gone back to some bad habits. Nothing that you can't fix
with some work.
I know it is easier said than done but maybe you need to get some help in
caring for your parents - do you have any siblings who could help out?
— Karen F.
June 30, 2001
Hi there, I know EXACTLY how you feel. I had open RNY in July 2000, lost
126lbs in 6 months and then everything since December has just been falling
apart for me. I had a very costly car accident, where no one was hurt
thankfully, but it shook me to bits, my first and hopefully last one.
Next,in January we discovered that my aunt who is like a mother to me, has
cancer in the womb. After extensive surgery she is still battling it with
many weeks of radiation. And to top this my own mother, who I had so many
unresolved issues with suddenly took 2 massive heart attacks and died on
March 8th, no indication of any heart problems. To say that I've been off
the rails since would be an understatement. I am seeing a therapist
regularly now, I didn't prior to nor after my surgery. To be quite honest,
I'm still in a state of disbelief and shock. But this last few days I'm
starting to come around a little to myself. Next week on 5th July I'll be 1
year post op and I can honestly say that I've only used 6 months of it
effectively. Now for the last few months I've beaten myself mentally over
that, regularly and unmercifully. I've told myself that things are no
different now than they were before the surgery, I knew I wouldn't be
successful at this, I'm not as good as everyone else and all that crap. Now
I've stopped that and sat back and seen how different things really are now
to 1 year ago. 1 year ago I'd have put up about 70-80lbs with a 6 month
period like I've just had. I've been through, am still working through a
lot of trauma and I've just about maintained my weight. Excuse me while I
fall over now after patting myself so hard on the back for this
achievement! You came a long way in order to make the decision to have the
surgery, as we all have here, people told me for ages before and since the
surgery how brave and courageous that was of me, I dismissed their remarks
in my mind as patronising, but lets get real here, THIS is a brave thing
we've done here, voluntarily too. I've stopped putting a time span on this
weight loss, I know I've problems, I know I've been grazing a LOT, tomorrow
I might or then again I mightn't. But at the end of the day we will get
there, this probably won't help you at all, me babbling on like this, I
just wanted you to not feel so alone with your problems because I've been
there, am still there. If you wish to talk privately please feel free to
email me at [email protected]. Take care and hang in there, we'll
make it. love Helen xxx
— Helen B.
June 30, 2001
Hi there, I know EXACTLY how you feel. I had open RNY in July 2000, lost
126lbs in 6 months and then everything since December has just been falling
apart for me. I had a very costly car accident, where no one was hurt
thankfully, but it shook me to bits, my first and hopefully last one.
Next,in January we discovered that my aunt who is like a mother to me, has
cancer in the womb. After extensive surgery she is still battling it with
many weeks of radiation. And to top this my own mother, who I had so many
unresolved issues with suddenly took 2 massive heart attacks and died on
March 8th, no indication of any heart problems. To say that I've been off
the rails since would be an understatement. I am seeing a therapist
regularly now, I didn't prior to nor after my surgery. To be quite honest,
I'm still in a state of disbelief and shock. But this last few days I'm
starting to come around a little to myself. Next week on 5th July I'll be 1
year post op and I can honestly say that I've only used 6 months of it
effectively. Now for the last few months I've beaten myself mentally over
that, regularly and unmercifully. I've told myself that things are no
different now than they were before the surgery, I knew I wouldn't be
successful at this, I'm not as good as everyone else and all that crap. Now
I've stopped that and sat back and seen how different things really are now
to 1 year ago. 1 year ago I'd have put up about 70-80lbs with a 6 month
period like I've just had. I've been through, am still working through a
lot of trauma and I've just about maintained my weight. Excuse me while I
fall over now after patting myself so hard on the back for this
achievement! You came a long way in order to make the decision to have the
surgery, as we all have here, people told me for ages before and since the
surgery how brave and courageous that was of me, I dismissed their remarks
in my mind as patronising, but lets get real here, THIS is a brave thing
we've done here, voluntarily too. I've stopped putting a time span on this
weight loss, I know I've problems, I know I've been grazing a LOT, tomorrow
I might or then again I mightn't. But at the end of the day we will get
there, this probably won't help you at all, me babbling on like this, I
just wanted you to not feel so alone with your problems because I've been
there, am still there. If you wish to talk privately please feel free to
email me at [email protected]. Take care and hang in there, we'll
make it. love Helen xxx
— Helen B.
July 19, 2002
I feel for you. I also am an emotional eater. I always have been, always
will be. Something that has seemed to help me is to stop an ask myself,
"what am I really feeling right now emotionally?". I have the
tendency to bury my real feelings with fool. It keeps me from feeling any
emotion that makes me uncomfortable. I have also given myself that,
"you are a failure at this too" tongue lashing. Just keep looking
forward. Keep your head up, an your heart open to your feelings. You will
succeed.
— denaa
Click Here to Return