How did i get here? How did you get here?

I guess cause my surgery is tomorrow my mind is in over drive, so i thought i'd see if anyone else has  or had similar feelings
Food its been very good to me really! I went to culinary school and have been lucky to be a chef in some amazing places as well as own my own resturants, I have met so many people through food both professionally ( athletes, heads of state, ex presidents) and personnaly. Being Italian  food and the kitchen has been the center of my home all the days of my life. And i have always appreciated it for what it is and the situations it can create.

I'm lucky as i need to loose 85lbs (per the dr i think 110) but have no other health issue none. So in the 9th hour i am asking am i sure i need to cut out most of my stomach? I have been a normal wieght most of my 46 years (just not the last 8yrs its been on the up swing) but seem to lose and gain the same 30lbs or so over and over again. I'm not second guessing and i'm not afraid i just cant believe it came to this. I should haved moved more (more sports, more physical activity, etc.)

And i dont want a NEW life i love the one i have. I just gotta remember to stay physically active doing something every day.

Has anyone else comtimplated the how i got here so close to surgery? Or is anyone else going through the same thing now?

I think there is a reason that most programs are a minimum of six months before you can get the surgery.  It is a big deal and a huge change.  I have struggled with weight issues all my life and an really tired of it.  I was heading straight for diabetes and other health problems.  You really have to make this decision for yourself.  This was my last resort.  If you are not at your last resort then you should evaluate if you are ready for such a big change.  I had my surgery last monday.  Today it is not suddenly easier I am just forced to do it.  Good luck.

I took about a year to decide if surgery was my answer. Yeah, i could lose 50 or so pounds, but gain it back and then some. Did i want that to continue? No. Did i want to enjoy my life even more than I did before surgery? Yes. Yes my life was pretty darn good before surgery, but after just a month out it is even better. I have more energy, my blood pressure is better, my libido is better (and my husband is thrilled!) i have a better attitude.

I guess you just need to think about what you expect and what you can tolerate in the future and go from there.

oh i'm not second guessing to have the sleeve at all ( been on the path since feb due to insurance requirements), and i look forward to taking it off and having a litle extra help to keep it off. I just cant believe  for some reason that i couldn't do it any other way, and being on this board has helped me to see others our in the same boat or on the same bench as they say here

 I had my surgery on July 27 of this year.  I did spend a lot of time (too much?) trying to figure out how I allowed myself to get to a place where I needed WLS.  But the fact remained that I was in that place.  Since surgery I have changed my thoughts from "how did I get here?" (which was not helping in any way) to "how can I get back there?" (the normal-sized place where I existed my whole life except for the past six years.)

This change in thought has been extremely helpful.  Combined with the VSG - I now feel confident that I will meet my ultimate goal.  I am enjoying the mini goals that lead there.  Instead of beating myself up - I am encouraging myself to make my outside match my inside.  

The surgery is always referred to as a tool and that is the truth. I prefer to use the term "instrument" which is one definition of a tool.   I like to think of it as an internal instrument.  It is up to everyone of us who has had surgery to learn how to best utilize it.  The great thing is that the instrument  will never go away.  It is always there just waiting for us to learn to play it, use it and, hopefully, master it.

I hope your surgery is as uneventful as mine was and that you find your "favorite tune" and play it every day.

Best of luck - Lulu

You say you are not second guessing, but you have surgery tomorrow and you just said, "am I sure I need to cut out most of my stomach?"

That sounds like second guessing. And thats okay. Surgery is a big deal, so if you need to ask if you're sure, then maybe you aren't sure. Surgeries can be cancelled if necessary. Don't do anything you don't feel you need/want to do.

I didn't have any health issues either. But I could see them coming. If my knee hurt one day, I was sure it was related to my obesity. I would think, "oh great, here it comes!" If I was excessively thirsty one day, I would be concerned about diabetes. And any time I heard stories about young women suffering heart attacks, I would worry that I could be next.

I also hated being uncomfortable on airplanes...not knowing if I would fit in rides at an amusement park...shopping in the plus size section...feeling uncomfortable in a bathing suit, etc. etc. etc. etc.

I also hated being ruled by food. I was constantly on the search for my next fix. Portions at restaurants seemed fine to me and I could usually finish them even with the bread basket beforehand.

Anyway, there we all have about a million reasons why we were led to WLS, but tomorrow, the only reasons that should matter are yours.

So, you tell us...why has it come to this for you? Why are you off to have your stomach cut down to size?

Best of luck,
Lindsey

I don't think I contemplated the "how did I get here" but I keep questioning is this the right way out.  Oh I know the answer..YES!!  After watching  my weight climb since 2001 and going to every diet possible, I have decided to stop being a slave to food.  Yes, I will keep a tracker and Yes I will make good choices.  Having this tool to help me is a gift... I only contemplate how awesome it will be this time next year with no back pain, no foot pain, hips that don't beg to be rested and to sit at a meal and feel happy and content with a small portion.

I asked myself the same questions sitting in the holding room at the hospital. How did I get here? Do I really need to do something this drastic? and on and on.... 
The question that I really had to answer was.......if I could do it on my own, then why haven't I?
For the first month post op I asked myself again why I didn't just buckle down and do it on my own......The truth is that I couldn't, it was all a vicious circle for me..I enjoyed food, I comforted myself with food, and I hid behind food...and I had to give it up. Like you I didn't have any real health issues, (I'm 45)..have been active my whole life....but could not get a handle on this control food had over me...I researched all the wls options for a long time before I made an appt with a surgeon. After I consulted with the surgeon I made the deal with my DH that I would just "get serious" and do it myself.....and I did until the first stall came..then came back my old friend food to comfort me during my frustration. I gained it all back, and then some...Enough said.....scared as hell..I called the surgeon's office, got another appt..and a month later was having surgery............and I don't regret one little minute of it.
I think most of us question these things up until they roll us through the operating room doors.
There is nothing that says you have to give up all of the great things that being a chef has brought into your life.....Most of us don't.....and if I really wanted to, I could eat anything that was set in front of me. Luckily, your tastes for food change post op, and for me my gluttonous hunger has gone away as well, but I can still enjoy good food...it's just that my idea of good food has changed drastically.
I'm a little over three months post op and I can tell you with all the second thoughts and hesitations that I had that this surgery is the best thing I have ever done for me and my family and I haven't missed out on a thing that I enjoyed pre-op, including cooking for family and friends, but I have gained soooo much more life by getting this weight off... 
I hope you find the answers you are looking for and good luck to you on your journey!

OMFG I am having the exact same thoughts.  But when I think, do I really need to cut out most of my well functioning stomach? I take out my iPhone and look at my weight loss notes.  Over the last year I have lost some weight, but since January only about 20 lbs prior to the preop diet.  Up and down over the same pound or pound and a half every damn week for MONTHS.  And that was with working out three times a week. 

The preop diet has shown me that I can live my life on 800-900 calories a day.  My smaller stomach will be the enforcer.  And since last September, when I want a bag of Lindor truffles or potato chips or a huge order of fried rice or the nineteen thousand foods I love that are bad for me, all I have to do is imagine my toes turning black (from TII diabetes) and I don't want it so much any more. 

I got a preop pedi with a good friend today who is five months out from VSG.  She says it is hard in the beginning, but it gets better, and now she says she would do it over again a hundred times.  As a lightweight, she's lost about 55 lbs and is 20 from her goal.

I think we will both feel better mentally tomorrow evening on the other side!  We may have postop issues, but the decision will be made and the deed done.  I don't know about you, but I have anticipatory anxiety in a big way not only about this but about LOTS of things big and small.  99% of the time, in or after the event, I wonder, why was I torturing myself so hard?

Wishing you an uneventful surgery and smooth recovery!  Sip and walk!

If I were younger, I would probably have still kept trying to lose weight on my own.  Obviously, if I had known the totality of my experience, maybe not, but at 36 I felt I had enough time to try to resolve my food issues without surgery.  I know several people who have done it more of less successfully. 

At 51, I felt I would die trying.  I had no comorbidities, but my mom dropped dead at 59, and I felt my own mortality.  I did not come to peace with my decision until a few weeks before surgery, but was ready when they wheeled me in.