Perhaps some people should keep their mouths SHUT

OK, it's been a week since this happened, but it bugged me enough that I still need to vent a little.  I am very fortunate that my family, friends and coworkers have been very supportive of my decision to have WLS (Well, at least the coworkers that I chose to tell!)  So I get into the hospital for surgery last Monday, go into the pre-op room to change and get my IV, and the anethesiologist comes in to ask questions, including my height and weight (5'3" and 251, after 16 pound pre-op diet loss.)  She turns and looks at me and says, "You don't weigh that much, why are you having this surgery?"  REALLY????  As I'm about to go into the OR???????  And then as I was walking the halls later that evening a nurse on the floor (luckily not mine) also decided to chide me about not seeming like I was large enough to resort to surgery  When I explained that I was already down 16 pounds from pre-op, she said, "Well, didn't that make you think you didn't really need the surgery?"  GRRRRRRR

I was polite.  I explained calmly as I turned the corner (yes, she was walking WITH me to tell me this stuff) that I had been trying to lose weight for over 20 years, and that losing 10-15 pounds I could usually do, but I needed a tool to help long-term loss.  I just can't believe she was spouting this stuff AS I WAS DEALING WITH PAIN FROM SURGERY THAT MORNING.  

OK, whew - got that out.  Thanks for listening.  

(Incidentally, my nurse was awesome, and demonstrated a little strut she wants me to do if we run into each other in the grocery store and she doesn't recognize me because I lost so much weight.)   :)

 Wow .. that is a damn shame that people can even act like that.  I had mine done in a "center of excellence" so they see patients with WLS everyday and I didn't hear anything like that.  I can't even imagine.  Good for you for handling it so well.

Like most social/personal issues people just aren't focused on your outlook only theirs. Until you've walked in someones shoes you should even attempt judging them! I bet in her mind she was paying you a compliment!

 I agree--I bet she thought it was a compliment. :)

I love the strut idea, hold onto THAT experience, not the crappy ones--when we spend time, energy, emotion on the negative stuff (after we process it) we are giving our power to it and keeping it alive--instead, you are keeping YOU alive and vibrant through a decision to improve your health and life. Best to you!

Wow. That must have been really sucky to hear that as you're about to go the OR.  Not sure what her point was seeing as though you had clearly made a decision about what was best for you and was literaly following through with your plan.  But a similar thing happened to me (Not on surgery day), but at my first meeting with the Surgeons Nurse Practitioner.  She kept saying
" you don't look like you need surgery" and "I kept telling the other nurses that our next patient looks too cute and small for surgery."  I was a little annoyed because then it made me start to question whether she was trying to send me some sort of subliminal messge that I shouldnt go through with it.  I did it anyway and am really happy!  I think people have an idea of what WLS patients should look like or be like==and I guess that idea is of the most extreme smo cases or something.  Because at 5'2" and 249 lbs I sure knew that there was nothing "too small" about me, lol.  But I took it as a sort of compliment and laughed it off since I knew that I knew my truth.

You get that from people whom have never had to deal with the issues we have dealt with! They are in the dark. Just shrug it off as someone whom does not know what your life has been through. Thats what i do.  No big deal, they weren't sick or a bmi of 40+ on yo yo diets for most of there life.

Unbelievable!!

I find it totally ironic because they have this assumption of what fat people look like and also how they eat. I know after my surgery we went out for a family birthday and everyone watched what I ate and said I could not possibly survive on what I was eating. Well, it's been two months and I'm still alive. The so-called normal people have no idea what it's like to live in our bodies. My pre-surgery weight was 295 and one nurse told me I was the smallest bariatric patient she had.

Wow, can't even imagine.  Like Kevin, I'm having mine done at a Center of Excellence and everyone has been amazing, even those that aren't specifically assigned to the bariatric unit.  Everyone who has worked with me, from those in the endoscopy, the really cute guy doing my leg ultrasound and the nurse, xray tech, phlebotomist and EKG guy during my preop testing have been amazing.  They have all congratulated me on making the decision to do this and treated me like a real person.  Looked me in the eye, talked to me about everything from Nascar to shopping and made me feel at ease with everything.  My nurse doing my preop had the sleeve done in December of last year and has lost 86 lbs and talked to me about her experience and the emotional stuff as well as they physical that goes along with being overweight and the surgery.  She spent 20 minutes afterwards just talking to me and answering questions.  I didn't realize how blessed I was about where I chose to have mine done until I started reading some of the stories on here.