Thought I was mentally prepared

Since I got the dang surgery date of Aug 14, my aniexty has kicked into full gear. I was 100% sure I was ready to make this giant step. I had already been losing so well on my own that I hadnt really given it any thought.
Then....in a group session the DR asked what my goals were...I said I was unsure...(not to be taken wrong) I had a goal of a size 14 from a size 24.I achieved this goal 8 weeks before scheduled WLS. He asked why are you not happy now that your a 14, that was your goal? I said I am happy, but I guess now that I made it this far on my own I am thinking I would like to see what a size 10 or 8 would be like. I have an end goal of 125lbs, I am 5'3". I guess I am wondering what size that would relate to..I have never been a size 14 before let alone something smaller so I have nothing to compare it to. Its extremely exciting and nerve racking all at the same time. I still see myself as a 24...will my brain start catching up soon? Did anyone else suffer this type of aniexty? I think I am scared that I still will be expecting more if I achieve the next goal.....anyone please if you did experience anything like this give me some advice.
My date for VSG is Aug 14 2012 and I cannot wait...but I need my brain to kick in!
Thanks
Rhonda

 I had horrible anxiety before surgery. I was self pay and kept thinking why was I spending 17k to mutilate my body especially when there were so many people in the world going hungry? I had so many weird thoughts and I didn't sleep for a couple of months before surgery. I kept hearing my Dr. tell me that I would be 120lbs within a year and my vanity got the better of me.  Anyhow, it was the best decision I ever made. Sure, I could also lose weight on my own but it never stayed off. Now I know why it is almost impossible to lose a significant amount a weight and keep it off without a tool such as surgery. The surgery was easy, recovery was easy and so was losing the weight. I maybe was luckier than some because I didn't have any problems at all. My surgeon gives me excellent support and I feel like I have my own team of specialists keeping me happy and healthy. Yesterday I went clothes shopping and still now when I grab a size 4P I am shocked that it fits. I put on a little fashion show in the store yesterday for my husband and had a whole group of women telling me how great I looked. Yes, health is important but still, vanity is a great ego booster! You will do just fine I am sure. Your brain may not kick in for a while but just remember that a year from now you too will be where you never thought you could be.

w00t! Congrats on the size 14! If I could have done that all by myself I *think*  I would have just kept rolling with it and foregotten about the surgery.

I'm also 5"3' and was on and off right around where you were with your starting weight.

My goal weight is 130. My goal is to take a horseback ride across New Zealand. If keep my eye on the real prize 130 should be a snap.

I was 135 once in my life, for a brief shining moment. It was in my early 20's and I remember very clearly looking in the mirror naked one day and thinking to myself "Goddamn! I could be a Playboy centerfold!"

The problem with that time was that to get to that point I was working out about 3 hours a day for 6-7 days a week and eating nothing but tofu and vegetables. Totally unsustainable for your "average" person who has to work and might possibly want a social life. Work - go home - eat tofu - go to the gym - go to bed.

I'm now 46. I'm pretty sure I'd have to be working out (and by that I mean running marathons) 7 days a week and eating nothing bu****er and celery. Over the years (although I've never been "thin" except for that one time) I've sloooooowly gained about 120 pounds give or take 15 pounds over that from time to time. I've "maintained" about about 260 for a number of years. I eat healthy, I exercise, but without taking this step there was just no rational way for me to get this other person off my ass.

So I don't really have advice for you except to keep doing what you're doing - you still have time to cancel your surgery if it looks like you're one of the lucky ones. I would recommend that you think about that word "goal". What does it really mean to you? I think if you really look at it, a goal of being a size 10 is not really all that inspiring of a goal. How about coming to New Zealand with me? :)

 There are days I still feel 220 lbs heavier. I still feel fat. I don't know how long catch up takes, but be prepared to deal with these mental struggles for a while. 

However, I think it may help you to set some non-scale, non-weight related goals for yourself to help you focus, and help you feel like you are actively working on/towards something, and something that you can really celebrate when you accomplish. I have to say that has been one of the main things that keeps me going on what has been a difficult journey. 

 I think what you're experiencing is extremely normal. Just push though the fear and anxiety. A year from now you'll be so glad that you did!!

I'm guessing that at your height 125 pounds would be about a size 4.
As for your anxiety, normal, don't worry you will do great.
When will your brain catch up to your body, that takes a lot longer usually. I am below goal yet sometimes I just can't wrap my head around the fact that I'm not overweight anymore. I still pick out clothes in stores that are far too big. People say things like you are thin or tiny and I think they are joking. I'm still not quite caught up brain wise. Good luck to you on this journey.

After losing 115 pounds I still feel huge. Granted, I'm currently where you started size wise, but I've come a long way from where I started. When I see pictures of myself I get extremely depressed. Not only do I feel 380 pounds but I feel like I LOOK like I'm 380 pounds still. I don't know if I've ever felt fatter than this in my life. It goes back and forth. Sometimes I feel "skinny" and within 2 seconds I can feel 115 pounds heavier and like the scaled lied and maybe I only lost muscle mass or something. It's been getting to me a lot lately. I wonder when I'll be able to feel pretty. Truly pretty.

As far as expecting more, it sounds like you're doing great on your own and once you have the surgery you'll probably get a lot smaller. I bet it will blow your mind if you get to a size 4 or less. I've seen it happen here. I would never expect to get lower than an 16/18 in pants. I have a wide frame and even at 150-160 pounds I was always in bigger pants and shirts than other girls my age even though I wasn't fat... more solid/muscular.

6 months into my surgery I have constant anxiety about so many different aspects about my future with regards to the surgery...

Thanks everyone...I am so glad I asked. I had a feeling you guys would come through for me.
A size 4...are you freakin kidding me...How awesome would that look and feel. YEEHAW.

Now to get to the other question/ statement..I agree that I have gone this far by myself why surgery, well. The fact is I always seem to put it back on. So this is more for maintence of keeping it off. I'm excited to have it, just nervous about not knowing what it would look like or feel it. I'm a very visual learning so its hard to put it into perspective...BUT a freakin size 4..HOLY CRAP!

I would be so into going to Austrailia or New Zealand...what a goal that would be. I will pursue looking into that further.

Again thanks to you all for some great advice and giving me some perspective.

Rhonda