food choices, volume and speed of consumption
I'm just in my 5th week out and doing well. I have only been sick once, and from all things, a RTD protein shake in the tail end of my stage 2 liquids. Go figure.
On purees and soft solids, I have eaten out of my house 3 times, no problems - no food ordered to speak of, just picking off my wife and daughter's plate, but no problems nonetheless. I have had approximately 120 meals and as many different foods as I could.
I have "nibbled" off plan 4 times in as many weeks... (infamous) gummy bears once, a spoon of peanut butter before I was allowed, a taste of my wife's birthday cake (hand dipped ice cream, 2 teaspoonfuls with a couple of cruchies) and a sip of Patron Cafe. No problems other than with my conscience on the Patron.
So I feel pretty good about my ability to eat what I want. I double measure everything, by volume and onto a scale because despite what my fellow guy friends here may think, size does matter.... Yet, every day at least once, I find myself pausing to allow for the food that I have managed to get stuck in my still fat gizzard to make it's way down to my tiny little stomach and pylorus.
I know I still eat too fast, which after surgeries, meds and 20 years of yo-yo dieting and excercise, was my biggest problem all along. Yep, I'm a speed demon. In addition to not helping my metabolism, and making my little meals less psychologically enjoyable, it's a great way to stretch out my new stomach. I fought for my right to have a few empty calories, but I concede to your experience here. I really, really don't want to go down this route.
So... the question I have for you guys and gals who are months, or even years out is, "How do you pace yourself?"
On purees and soft solids, I have eaten out of my house 3 times, no problems - no food ordered to speak of, just picking off my wife and daughter's plate, but no problems nonetheless. I have had approximately 120 meals and as many different foods as I could.
I have "nibbled" off plan 4 times in as many weeks... (infamous) gummy bears once, a spoon of peanut butter before I was allowed, a taste of my wife's birthday cake (hand dipped ice cream, 2 teaspoonfuls with a couple of cruchies) and a sip of Patron Cafe. No problems other than with my conscience on the Patron.
So I feel pretty good about my ability to eat what I want. I double measure everything, by volume and onto a scale because despite what my fellow guy friends here may think, size does matter.... Yet, every day at least once, I find myself pausing to allow for the food that I have managed to get stuck in my still fat gizzard to make it's way down to my tiny little stomach and pylorus.
I know I still eat too fast, which after surgeries, meds and 20 years of yo-yo dieting and excercise, was my biggest problem all along. Yep, I'm a speed demon. In addition to not helping my metabolism, and making my little meals less psychologically enjoyable, it's a great way to stretch out my new stomach. I fought for my right to have a few empty calories, but I concede to your experience here. I really, really don't want to go down this route.
So... the question I have for you guys and gals who are months, or even years out is, "How do you pace yourself?"
I shouldn't admit that I don't measure anything, but I really don't. I just eyeball it. (I've spent YEARS in the kitchen feeding four kids and other family so my guess is really good).
HOWEVER, before every bite I try to remember to say, "Small and slow." That keeps me in check. I am 4 months out and 70 pounds down. I think I'm doing something right. : )
Plus, if you eat too fast it can hurt. A few times of that should slow you down.
I read your "gummy bears incident" and had to admit that I've done the same thing except with cream horns. Loved them for a couple of days. Hope I never see another one. lol
Remember: "Small and slow."
HOWEVER, before every bite I try to remember to say, "Small and slow." That keeps me in check. I am 4 months out and 70 pounds down. I think I'm doing something right. : )
Plus, if you eat too fast it can hurt. A few times of that should slow you down.
I read your "gummy bears incident" and had to admit that I've done the same thing except with cream horns. Loved them for a couple of days. Hope I never see another one. lol
Remember: "Small and slow."
Oh, I get it! I too was a speed demon when it came to eating. There are two things that help slow me down now. One: it hurts. After a couple of instances of eating too fast, I learned. Two: My goal is to appear as normal as possible when eating with others. The easies way to do that is to eat slowly and small bites- that way it looks like I am continuously eating as long as they are, without consuming nearly the volume.
I somehow missed the Gummy Bear post and had to go back and find it in order to have a better understanding of where you are in the process. I believe strongly that the big issue when it comes to success or failure in the long term with the VSG or any other WLS is mindfulness. Believe it or not, I am much less strict about the exact "diet" someone chooses than I am about the head issues that go into the decision or lack of decision making. Although I believe that some diets are significantly more conducive to weight loss than others, I know that the ultimate prize is the relearning of our eating habits and the willingness to make changes in our eating when what we are doing is not working. It is the forging of a new relationship with food that eventually carries the day and leads to ultimate success and freedom from regain anxiety.
The question you are asking is most probably the key question of your journey. How do you learn to eat mindfully? The answer to this question is different for each of us. For me, I have found that doing something that people have done for thousands of years before me is really helpful. I don't take a bite without first stopping, taking a deep breath and feeling grateful for the food in front of me. I see the food as a "gift" an offering and something that is not to be taken as a given. This slows me down, helps me connect with the reasons I am eating this food, and gives me time to make choices as to whether I want/need this food and how much is really good for me. I eat for 20 min. and then I stop. I treat these eating times as meditations, in other words, I take the mechanical gulping that used to be considered eating by me, out of the equation.
At first, I had to do this very thoughtfully and it took time to make this a habit. But of all my habits, I would tell you that it's one I have learned from the most. There is so much more to say on this topic, as this is really the conduit to all the other habits that needed to be relearned and reshaped by me. The VSG is the tool, the mindfulness is the muscle I use to work the tool. I need both to make this work in the long run.
The question you are asking is most probably the key question of your journey. How do you learn to eat mindfully? The answer to this question is different for each of us. For me, I have found that doing something that people have done for thousands of years before me is really helpful. I don't take a bite without first stopping, taking a deep breath and feeling grateful for the food in front of me. I see the food as a "gift" an offering and something that is not to be taken as a given. This slows me down, helps me connect with the reasons I am eating this food, and gives me time to make choices as to whether I want/need this food and how much is really good for me. I eat for 20 min. and then I stop. I treat these eating times as meditations, in other words, I take the mechanical gulping that used to be considered eating by me, out of the equation.
At first, I had to do this very thoughtfully and it took time to make this a habit. But of all my habits, I would tell you that it's one I have learned from the most. There is so much more to say on this topic, as this is really the conduit to all the other habits that needed to be relearned and reshaped by me. The VSG is the tool, the mindfulness is the muscle I use to work the tool. I need both to make this work in the long run.
Elina, I know why so many OH'ers love and follow you. Your style is sage and your guidance bleeds wisdom. I hear what you're saying and believe that you're 100% correct with the fact that willfulness is far more important than other choices because it will override all of the other errors. It may not be scripture to eat a forkful of cake, but having the mental fortitude to stop at one forkful and enjoy it for all of it's sweet and savory goodness and be thankful is what it will take to ultimately hit our goal, maintain forever and enjoy the process without resentment.
Now, having said that and washing it down with the Kool-Aid, I work in a truck, wear work boots a lot, climb ladders and employ guys who swear and spit. Maybe not anything to brag on, but it keeps my family comfy and not wanting for anything. Anyway, as enticing as it sounds, it may be a little more difficult for me to sit down and meditate for 20mins while I eat my 2oz of ground turkey and reflect on it... I will certainly try this at home, and during the work week, I guess I'm going to have to work on some more primitive methods, like counting to 5 between bites and turning my phone off for 15 minutes.
Now, having said that and washing it down with the Kool-Aid, I work in a truck, wear work boots a lot, climb ladders and employ guys who swear and spit. Maybe not anything to brag on, but it keeps my family comfy and not wanting for anything. Anyway, as enticing as it sounds, it may be a little more difficult for me to sit down and meditate for 20mins while I eat my 2oz of ground turkey and reflect on it... I will certainly try this at home, and during the work week, I guess I'm going to have to work on some more primitive methods, like counting to 5 between bites and turning my phone off for 15 minutes.
I hear your intelligence and commitment pouring through your posts. I have no doubt that you will take my advice, along with all the other great advice from others and combine it to make a formula and technique that is ideally suited to your work space and needs. Whatever you find, mindfulness will have to be part of the equation, there is no way around this basic truth. How mindfulness is achieved and maintained, well that can be as individual as you are. I am glad you are on this board, we need the testosterone. :) Work boots, ladders, and guys who swear and spit, oh my, what's not to like. :)
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