Work vent. Fearing discrimination.

I meet with my boss' boss tomorrow to discuss my perception that I am in a dead end role. The big question I want answered: Why, if you told me a year ago that I was to be promoted last June or September, are you now telling me it'll be a year from now? I am going to request specific feedback, but I doubt there will be any performance-based reason why I must wait. I have not received a *single shred* of constructive feedback since last January, yet have received quarterly performance-based bonuses in 2012.

It leaves me with the sinking suspicion that it's because I'm a fat girl. It is totally a boys' club there. 

Completely not cool. I am considering if it's time to go start my own business.

Wow, I am sorry to hear that. That is definitely a must-have conversation. Let us know how it goes.

One year ago I heard through the work grapevine that if I didn't lose weight, dress better, and wear more makeup that I wouldn't get a promotion. I did all those things and got one. Stupid ******** 

This makes me want to weep. Worked my ass off in 2012: check. Performing a role that is a level above my own by all info published by HR; check. Dress better: check. Wear more makeup: check. Losing weight is all that is left, and frankly, I'm not sure I want to work for a group of frat boys who would promote me only after that happened. 2013 will be a fascinating year, I think, with life-altering decisions to be made.

I'm so sorry to hear this.  I think that fat discrimination is a reality. I know for a fact I was fired from a really well paying, high profile job 10 years ago because I starting gaining weight at an alarming rate (went from a size 8 to a size 16 almost overnight).  I truly believe there is fat discrimination in the workplace, and there have been studies that prove it.

Good luck with your discussion tomorrow. Weight bias is so prevalent... I knew it was when I was pre-op but it is sadly even more obvious as a post-op, when people don't know your past and share their nasty thoughts freely. Here are a few resources I hope they help:

http://www.yaleruddcenter.org/resources/upload/docs/what/bia s/employers-employees/WeightBias_Employee.pdf

http://www.obesityaction.org/wp-content/uploads/Weight-Bias- in-the-Workplace.pdf

~Michelle "Shelly"

Good for you for having the guts to do that!  Yes, please, do come back and post how your meeting turned out. 

Another thing I see in my own company is "age" discrimination.  I love it when people deny it.  Seriously?  Corporate America - I don't know sometimes.

There's a lot of stalled intentions going on in the corporate world right now.  Seeking specific feedback is a fantastic idea.  It may have absolutely nothing to do with you personally.  

BTW - I worked in a department of 200, only about a dozen females - and when I got my DS, I was overwhelmed at the amount of support I got from the guys.  I hope you'll get the same experience.

Well, my meeting was delayed. My response, "I understand that emergencies come up with clients so we can reschedule. I just don't want this to fall off the table because this is an important conversation to me. Let's please commit that we'll have this conversation very soon."

This prompted a phone call to explain in more detail about the project that's gone sideways and why he was called summoned to the SVP's office. I was at the doctor's office and could not grab it just then, so we have been playing phone tag ever since. 

So, we'll see. 

I'm not mad, just mumbling and grumbling this evening.

Another colleague, a lady who happens to have a BMI much higher than mine, is in the same boat.

I love my company. It was rated in one of the top 20 places to work nationwide, but we've got an issue about getting women into leadership roles. Disappointing, to say the least.