ANGRY

I am so mad!  So, I decide to tell my mother that I am having a revision surgery done from my band to sleeve due to my issues with fills/unfills and gaining weight back.  She says to me "what??  Can't you just have them take the band off and then watch what you eat?"  Um..sure...because that surely worked for me the first 30 years of my life!  Why is it the people closest to us don't even seem to understand???

Sorry you're having to deal with an unsupportive family.  I think unless they've been through it it's hard to. Although empathy would be nice.   Good luck!  Just keep pressing on.  You know what's best.

Thanks!  It's just so frustrating!

I know how you feel.  I have told my mom I am going to have weight loss surgery and she said the EXACT same thing...."Can't you just do it yourself and watch what you eat?".  I wonder if it is fear that something may go wrong with the surgery and they're afraid something terrible will happen.  She has two friends that have both had WLS-one had the lapband and the other RNY.  In her eyes, both of them still are fat, so she has her mind made up that it doesn't work.  They both had their surgery about 10 yrs ago now.  I tell her, I am NOT them and have made up my mind that I will do whatever is required of me by the surgeon to lose and maintain a healthy weight.

That's just the thing..it's a tool.  Not everyone uses it in the same way or in the best way.  So much more is known about WLS now than 10 years ago.  It's much more common and the aftercare is much better I believe.  It's hard to educate people.  They don't get it.

Mom: "what??  Can't you just have them take the band off and then watch what you eat?" 

You: No, Mom, I CAN'T. That became crystal clear years ago. I can't do this without help, and I hope you'll support me.

Bette,

That's exactly the message I need to give her.  Unfortunately, she's not very supportive in many things.  I have an insulin pump because I am type 1 diabetic. The other day, she was at my house and made a comment while I was filling my pump and changing my reservior saying "wow.  you really go through all of that? Seems like taking shots is just easier.  Why bother with all that?"  Hmmm...lets see...because I would be taking 5 injections a day and with the pump, my sugar is more evenly controlled!  I guess I just expect more empathy, understanding and support. 

"Mom, if you can't be supportive, zip it."

I'm going threw the same thing..no support..I'm seriously thinking about not having surgery.i can't deal with all the negative. I'm a pretty happy person . Everyone else is sucking the life out of me.

I know how you feel.  Please hang in there.  Remember, you are doing this for yourself, to be a healthier person and feel great.  They may not understand now, but once you start losing and they see the great changes you are making, they may understand more.