WLS and kids. What did you tell them?

I am having a revision surgery in 12 days. Last time I did not tell my son. He was 8 at the time and it seemed better to keep it from him. This time around, he is 15. I don't feel its right to try to hide this from him. But I am nervous to tell him. He worries about me and I don't want to upset him. I am also not sure what to do the day of the surgery. Should I send him to school? Let him stay in the hospital with my family? I don't want to tramatize him. He is such a great kid and I just really want him to be ok. Can anyone else give me any advice on this or share their experience?

I was a pretty aware 15 year old.  If my parents were having surgery, I would want to know and I would have been extremely angry had they not told me.  Whether or not he goes to school or the hospital depends on him.  Will he be able to focus if he's in school or will he be worried about you?  

I think being open and honest is always the best way to go. 

I think being open and honest is always the best way to go. 

I think being open and honest is always the best way to go. 

I had the sleeve two weeks ago.  I have two boys 12 and 14.  I was very honest about this entire process.  I had them come to the initial informational meeting, along with my  husband.  My 12 yr old worries a lot.  We talked regularly about the procedure and his concerns.  He wanted me to do the band.  My feeling is knowledge is power.  The unknown is far scarier.  This procedure is not only a life changing event for me but my entire family.  I also told them that they would have additional responsibilities as I recovered.  The day of surgery my husband and I had to leave before they went to school.  We kept in touch via cell phone.  It was out patient, so I was home that night.  My youngest actually slept downstairs with me and my husband just to make sure I was ok.  My advice- be honest.  He can handle it.   

I'd tell him. If you don't, but he picks up on the air of secrecy he may imagine something worse than surgery is up & worry about that. If he's going to worry may as well be included so he has a chance to get the reassurance he needs. Then, I'd ask him if he'd rather be with you & family at the hospital or at school. At 15 he can tell you which will help him the most through your surgery.

When I told my daughter, 21 in 2 months, her mature response was, "Great! I've been so worried about you alone while I'm at college. But if you get skinnier than me I'm gonna jump on you & squish you!"

Told her she'd have to catch me first!

I didn't go into great detail with my children, however I did inform them that I was going to have surgery to be healthier and a better mommy for them. 

I just wanted to thank you guys for the advice. I spoke with my son on Sunday. He was really great. I am so glad he knows. I didn't like having a secret from him. I always knew that I had to tell him...I was just so nervous to do it! I'm glad thats over with and now he is in "the loop". Thanks again!