A little bit of a breakdown...
So my boyfriend and I were supposed to go to a party tonight- I like to go out much more after losing 40 pounds... well the party was a complete dud. Quite scary actually. We left, and he requested we go to the bar, but after the weird experience I was ready to go home. I felt bad for wanting to leave the party and not going to the bar so I told him to stop at burger king so he could get something to eat. As we get to the drive up, he (without even thinking) asks me what I want.
What do I want? Everything. All of it. I've had a bad week and a bad day and I want to give up. But I know that I absolutely can NOT have anything on the menu. So instead I just cry. Of course this makes my boyfriend feel horrible because he thinks it's his fault. So then I feel even worse because he shouldn't feel that way.
So while he eats the burger king I took out my cheese stick, unwrapped it, peeled off a piece, and what do I do but drop the whole cheese stick in the dirt. So I cry more.
So really today was a difficult day, and I am emotional over everything. Taking things one day at a time. Every day for me is an inner battle that I get better and better with every time.
So to everyone having a bad day, take a nice deep breath and know tomorrow is a new day, and start again!
A battle which you WON! We all get days like that when this all seems so very hard. Kudos to you for not resorting to bad old eating behaviours. If you can handle difficult days, you are truly on track. Let feeling proud of yourself take precedence over feeling miserable.
Highest 290, Banded - 248 Lowest 139 (too thin!). Comfort zone 155-165.
Happily banded since May 2006. Regain of 28lbs 2013-14. ALL GONE!
But some has returned! Up to 175, argh! Off we go again,
Some days are tougher than others - you done good, girl! Each success makes us stronger, but even so, we still have to fight the ongoing battle. 
I realized earlier in the week that I was totally stress eating because of a very stressful family situation. The catch is that I was conscious of doing it. It sounds like you are there too.
That is how we win this war - staying mindful and making one choice at a time. Good for you for not diving into a Whopper and fries.
What I have found is that there is usually something I can have on any menu, no matter what. When you are in a good frame of mind, spend a bit of time researching menus of various restaurants and having your "reference dish" - the one thing you can have there that fits into your plan without you having to walk the walk of shame afterwards. Then order that. Don't look at the menu, don't reconsider, just do it. You'll find that you will gain flexibility and control as time goes on. That is what you want to shoot for - control over food and control over various environments. It won't always be this brittle.
I have found in many fast food cases a chicken salad without dressing or a grilled chicken sandwich (and I remove the bun) is enough to get me through. I know that I am covered and not stuck/trapped which seems to be what you were reacting to.
Good luck.
Laurie
Sleeved 6/12/13 - 100 pounds lost to get to goal!
He is actually extremely supportive and has been from the start. It was like 1 in the morning and nothing else was open and he was hungry. He is not used to the way I have to eat yet it hasn't even been two months... plus I told him to stop there and his first response was "are you sure" and when I cried he said "I'm not eating this in front of you I'll wait until we get home" I told him to eat it, because this lifestyle was my choice, and it is unfair to him if try to change his life too. He has been very good about the whole thing, and if he goes I to a convenient store for snacks he always grabs me a cheesestick and water. I couldn't ask for a more supportive loving man.
Batwingsman · 5 replies · 1733 views