Re: Needed to vent

Fran P.
on 10/22/04 1:44 pm - FLANDERS, NJ
To my WL Family, In reading over all of the posts every morning I can't help to be so proud and blessed to have had the opportunity to be involved with such a courageous, beautiful and compasionate group of people. I become very upset when I hear people say that, " this is an easy way out" or "use a little will power and you'll lose weight". Do they not think that we have tried to do this in other ways. It's not as if we have the operation and the "WL Fairy" waves a magic wand and the pounds come off while we just sit around doing nothing. Do these people think that one morning we woke up and said, "I think I want to become a food addict" and then we proceeded to continue to eat and see how much we could gain because we all love carrying 300 to 400 or more pounds around everyday. We also enjoy not being able to walk and take part in the activities with our family...husbands, children, grandchildren, parents and friends. Do they also think that we love all of the ailments that come along with obesity??? That we all sat down one day and said, "I will eat more today so I will develope more problems than my other obese friends or family"? This is not a game it is our lives and I know if there was another way of doing this I would have done it 50 years ago. Oh, I could lose a little but when I gained it back I weighed more than I did when I startded the diet. I can't help to think about that beautiful and profound Indian saying, before you judge me..."WALK A MILE IN MY SHOES". I want to thank my Higher Power that he has blessed me with a family that is very supportive of me having this surgery, but some others have not been, they have offered their unsolicited advice. For them, I say, "Don't insult my intelligence, my decision to have surgery has not been made without a great deal of thought, research, education and prayer". I also add that they are entitled to their opinion but please respect my decision...you don't have to agree with it but respect it. The infamous question I get from some people is..."aren't you scared"? Yes I am scared!!! I was also scared of spinal surgery to remove 4 herniated dics, gallbladder surgery, arm and hand surgery for nerve damage, surgery for endometreosis and 3 heart attacks were no day at the beach either. So yes, some days I am scared but I am trying to keep a positive attitude and hope and pray that when my insurance approves coverage for surgery (oh yea, jumping through these hoops is a barrell of fun also, I'd really want to do this if I didn't feel the need) my higher power will guide the hands of my surgical team and all those caring for me to have a successful, non- eventful surgery. I ask that for all of you that disagree with your loved ones having surgery, to try and remember how hard it is on those of us living the way we are now, and that the bottom line is that death is not a stranger to those *****main obese. WLS needs to be our decision and for me it was the last resort I ca't go on existing rather than living...I have left my house about 10 times in the last 14 months, why? because I physically can't without great pain. I hope I don't sound like I am complaining, I guess I just needed to vent a bit...please just bear with me and pray for me that I am aprroved for surgery soon. Thank you all for being there for me. To all that are having surgery you are in my thoughts and prayers. For those that have already had surgery keep up the good work and believe me I know it must be work. THIS IS NOT THE EASY WAY OUT... but for some it is the last hope and the only way. Big Hugs to all, Fran (From Jersey)
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