I had to quit my job today

Today I quit my job. They have been very antagonistic over the last two years and mentally it was killing me. Yesterday was the last straw with my boss throwing my mental health in my face (I've taken antidepressants for 15 years) and last week I had to start taking Ativan again to get through my days. One woman had it out for me and my supervisor (who I had no issue with) 'refused to get involved' (because they are friends). Had she - this would never have happened. They completely broke me. So I had no other option. My question is, will this affect my chances at getting the surgery? As long as I can recover mentally (I feel so much better now that I've quit - even without the EI safety net) I should be ok, right? I'm doing my second round of appts in October...social worker, nurse and nutritionist.

thanks

I cant see why it would hurt you, especially if your job was a huge contributor to your stress and mental state! Good for you for quiting..toxic workplaces are horrible and not worth your time or effort. 

~Brittany

I agree with Brittany

You have to do what is good for you!! 

Good for you, i admire your strength! (have you considered lodging a complaint against your boss, for harassment?)

I can't see that it will affect your surgery, this will improve your mental health.

Monica

Hi,

I'm sorry to hear about all your stress and trouble at work.  That should not happen to anyone: this is not cosmetic surgery, this is necessary, major surgery.  This shouldn't affect your operation though, you could tell the social worker that you will soon have another job, that you have a hubby who can afford to take care of you, or that you have lots of money invested that will tide you over a few years until you get just as good a job as you had, etc. 

I am unemployed and not receiving any benefits (I live with my parents) and was depressed for 20 years, so the social worker was worried that I would not be able to "afford taking vitamins for life", which was silly, since my parents support me.  It did take me five minutes to convince her that they would also pay for vitamins, and I would inherit enough money to pay for vitamins.  I offered to call my father and mother on my cell phone so she could talk to them about her vitamin worries, but she saw reason and declined my offer.  Luckily, I only had to see her once.  She never cracked a smile, unlike any of the other TWH bariatric team. 

The psychologist I saw there was very, very nice.  I imagine your next round of appointments after the nurse, social worker, & Nut will be a psychologist and possibly a psychiatrist.  I didn't have to see a psychiatrist, but the psychologist did speak to my recently retired psychiatrist and my new 'replacement' psychiatrist, so it's important to know that they will probably call your psychiatrist.  You need him/her to be your advocate when they speak with the psychologist, so let them know they might get a call and ask them what they will tell the psychologist, tell him/her that the key words are "mentally stable", which you do need to have been for some unknown period prior to getting the go ahead for the operation.  But remember, many people who have RNYs have some form of mental illness, usually depression, so that does not automatically rule you out by any means.

Since you haven't seen the social worker yet, you have to make a choice of what to tell her.  I don't know whether or not they can tell if you are on UI or not through your OHIP coverage status, but your psychiatrist may mention your struggle with your former employers, etc., so the truth is probably the best option.

Good luck and try not to worry about getting the go-ahead.

Jenn.  :)

u can still get EI even if you quit. Make sure you record this and make sure your HR dept knows, even if you have quit. EI will grant you the money. I am very sorry this happened and work can be our main stress in life. U quitting doesn't mean you cant handle it. Abuse is wrong, at home, at school, at work !!! Its very unfair and they definitely forced you out the door. Maybe talking to the social worker at your program will help. they are not there to judge you, but to make sure u have all the support you need. 

You CAN get EI.  This would be considered a 'forced resignation' due to any number of factors i.e. harassment and/or your mental health.  Your GP can complete the section on the EI form that relates to this.  You also want to apply right away (as soon as you get your ROE) as it takes about 6 weeks for them to send you a cheque.

I don't think it should affect your surgery at all.  First it wouldn't be something they'd even know about unless you told them and if you do tell them it would seem to me that what you did actually demonstrates that you have the inner strength to set clear boundaries and take action (even when very difficult) to take care of yourself and maintain the boundaries.  Employment status isn't a criteria for surgery.

All the best

I am going through Guelph as well, and am in a battle with my work.  I suffer from chronic back pain ( fractured my back in 3 places, have herniated discs, unsuccessful surgeries....etc etc etc..).  I am presently not being paid.

The social worker at Guelph was mainly concerned about my being able to afford the cost of two weeks of opti and the lifelong vitamin regimen.  She was satisfied and cleared me for surgery. 

I think you should be fine.  Good luck in your journey.

Thanks all for the support. I'm just feeling a whole bunch of emotions right now (mostly anger and betrayal) but once I get my financial situation figured out I think I'll be ok. We are ok financially, I just like to feel a bit more secure with a cushion. I've got other issues..and now that I'll be turning 40 in the new year, I think I need to be strong and start doing things to make myself happy. Right? It's freakin scary, but I will absolutely regret it if I don't try.

To start -- YOU ARE AWESOME.  FOR REAL.  And no, I am not being patronizing -- I know EXACTLY what you have been through and how difficult it is to walk away from a job you have been at for a long time because of toxicity of your collegues.  Trust me, you are better off.

You are feeling very scared right now ... of the UNKNOWN.  You have been given FANTASTIC information by everyone who has posted to your thread.  You ARE entitled to EI!  It may just take an extra week beyond the traditional 28 days, but you are entitled based on what you just stated to us.

Regarding the assessment team, I was simply honest with them all alone the way.  Spin it in a way that shows that you have reached a point in your life where you want to focus on yourself, and not others, and intend on making some significant changes to help support your physical and mental health.  You yourself said that leaving the job was for your mental health.  GOOD ON YOU!  They will recognize this as a very positive step!  The fact that you have a partner with income strengths your positive decision making to leave.

My honesty with TWH did cause me a 6 month delay.  The resident psychdr was, IMHO, a GOOF, and it took me a meeting with a staff pdoc to sort things out.  Alas, with scheduling delays and processes, that pdoc meeting didn't happen for 6 months.  However, I was quickly cleared and now have my surgeon appt. next Friday.  Please try and remember, IMHO, TWH is really thorough and there to protect us and create successes.  If they feel you need a couple extra months to sort things out, then maybe you do.  Now if you disgree, state your position and they will listen and speak to you about.  We are all in a rush to live life healthier than before ... but, as I believe, our time isn't always God's time. :)

If you ever need someone to talk to, please don't hesitate to message me.   Surprisingly, we are in somewhat similar positions (but I don't even have a partner to support me financially!).  It's nice to know that others are by your side.