First it was the food police... now it's the exercise police. *Sigh*

So I am 3.5 months out.  When I first came back to work I had the food police on me.  They were everywhere.  Especially at work, but including my husband to be.  Now that the food police have retreated, because they are used to my new way of eating, here come the exercise police.  It's soooo frustrating.  My hubby to be is telling me constantly to walk more, take the stairs more, do more cardio, etc. etc.  Today at work I stubbed my toe quite badly (darn sandals) and I took the elevator and I just had a co-worker who I consider a dear friend too wag her finger at me and say "you should be taking the stairs now Missy".  Really?  REALLY?  What do I say to these people?  I am following plan, doing 70 minutes of walking a day at a minimum 10,000 steps and I just am so dumbfounded I can't even think of a witty response.  I know they mean well but it's sooo frustrating.  Can anyone else relate?  Anyone have some tips?  Please share.

Hey Dreamy , 

I can somewhat relate , but not sure on tips ! My Mother in law has ALWAYS been the food police around me . So that hasn't changed really , now she's moved her focus on to me becoming a size 6 ! I keep telling her it's not about a number , and I may never be a size 6 ...however ..she cannot fathom this and thinks that's what I should ' aspire' to ! She's so image concipus it's ridiculous.  She drives me insane ....but that's a whole other story ! Lol 

My issue at this point is now people are commenting on how thin I look , and maybe I should stop . I currently weigh 203 lbs and I'm 5'5 . I had a friend the other day tell me I didn't look happy and I'm way too thin ! Then she went on to complain about her weight . She's said she is 147 lbs now ! She's the same height and frame as me......I tried to explain to her that it's just because she is used to seeing me fat that it's a shock to her ( she's back in Scotland so it's just pictures she is seeing ) and if she feels uncomfortable at 147 lbs ...why does she think it's any different for me ? At 203 lbs ! But then I get the whole " yeah but Jackie some people are just not meant to be small " !!!! Wtf does that mean ! And she's not the only one . It's kind of infuriating , we try so hard to do this for ourselves , and we need that encouragement , and I wish people would understand that . The food police are just as bad . I seriously don't know why people think that they can dictate to us ! 

Anyway , I went on about this to Hubby and he just assured me that yeah its just a shock to people , and because it's such a major change , people think they have every right to comment . So I guess ,we really need just be set within our own mind , set our goals based on how WE feel and make sure we are confident about the path we are on . That way , we won't waver or be influenced by others . Because really , I've come to realize that people are always gonna have some thing to say , no matter what . We can overcome that though , nod politely , mull it over if we don't want it , toss it aside and move on.  

It sounds like you are doing a great job love ! Keep up the good work , and plaster that polite smile on and carry on ! 😃

Jax x

Awww thanks for your reply Jax!  You are so right (and so wonderful!).

xoxo

Just hang on there, the comments will slow down and basically be gone.  Right now, everything is so knew to them, that they are over cautious on your behalf.  Just keep doing what you know you should be doing.  And remember, they don't live with you, so they make their decisions on what they see.  They are trying to show that they care, but they can go overboard.

As for your hubby to be, maybe he should be more involved in your exercise, go for walks together.  Then he can see how much you are doing, and track your distance, then you both can see how much exercise you are increasing by.  As you keep doing it, the distance (not necessarily the time) will increase.

I wish you well on your journey.
Cathy

Hi Cat - the thing is, with my hubby to be, we do most of our exercising together.  About 5 - 7 hours of walking per week, at least 10,000 steps a day and he still thinks it's not enough.  He actually tracks us on his android mobile phone.  I finally snapped and told him he has to stop being the exercise police and he was dumbfounded.  I am really lucky in that he is supportive in other ways but this just takes the cake.  It gets me so annoyed but you are right, I do have to remember that he is just being over cautious and he does care.  But it's still frustrating.

This might sound harsh, but you need to tell people to back off!

Your body, what you eat, how often you execerise is nobody's business.  Set some firm boundaries with people letting them know that you don't want to hear their thoughts unless you ask for them. Tell them as good as the intentions are, you don't need advice. You should be free of this at work especially! 

Tell them the only person  you'll listen to about these matters is your doctor.

Smile and say "Thanks. My doctor is keeping track of me."

Honestly right now the surgery is doing all the work and you really do not HAVE to exercise. My surgeon says the surgery can get you to goal but exercise helps keep you there. I did no exercise until month 7 and still managed to get to goal and stay here.

If you are talking about your surgery and new way of life, STOP DOING THAT. It gives people permission to make comments.

Keep doing what you are doing. The comments will stop, I promise!!

Excellent response - I agree 100%.

Great response Laura.  Other than to my hubby, I don't really talk about it at work but people can't help but notice as everyone does know I had gastric bypass.  I didn't want any water cooler rumor mill conversations happening and I wanted to stigma bust so I was open about it (plus I was off for 6 weeks).  But I don't talk about it now.  I am going for coffee with the offending co-worker this morning and I am going to tell her I didn't appreciate her "you should be taking the elevator missy" comment.  But I will do it in a nice way.  Gotta practice this being assertive and telling people how you want to be treated business.  But boy, is it ever tough.  I really admire people who are naturally assertive.  I hope with my continued weight loss I will gain some backbone! hehehe

People think we're on a diet! They don't get it. It is frustrating for sure to constantly hear the comments. Only time will show them what this is about, but just nod and say "thanks for caring about me!" Lol