Was I bad?

So I have been on liquids since my pre op started Oct 28th.  My surgery was 11/8.  I am not losing weight - I've lost 17lbs including my pre op.  I found myself getting really depressed this last week.  Seriously depressed.  I know I need to talk to someone but I decided I needed food - if I could just eat something it might help.

SO  I made a scrambled egg and ate it along with a tablespoon of 2% cottage cheese and a tablespoon  of sugarfree applesauce.  It tasted so good.  I had no negative reaction other than mentally feeling I had broken the rules.

So was I wrong?  at 5 weeks out should I be able to eat that much?  It really wasn't that I was hungry I just wanted the comfort of the food I think.  And it didn't make me less depressed.  Now I have guilt added to my depression.

Did I eat too much? Since I haven't lost weight in over 2 weeks maybe my surgery is a failure? 

i was only on liquids for 2 days aftger getting out of the hospital, then purees for 2 weeks..so i was eating scrambled eggs yougurt, cottage cheese, cheese, just a few days out of surgery...so that was not too much to eat at 5weeks post op...but it depends on what your surgoens plan is....every surgeon is different, but i dont really understand how drs expect people to not eat for like 2-4 months of just being on liquids...just does not make sense to me....but you have to decide if your going to follow your surgeons plan to the T or make a few adjustments...
my food plan once i got to purees was 2 oz of lean protein with 2 oz of fruit or vegge 3 times a day, with 2 snacks of cheese, yogurt, milk, or protein shake if you need the extra protein.......now with me being 8 months out it has not changed, but the amounts has now its 4-6 oz of proteins, and 2-4 oz of fruit or vegge 3 times a day along with 2 snacks...at 6 months they added in nuts, whole grains, corn, beans etc....starches...
i have not had a protein shake since just a few days home form the hospital as i was eating my protein..
hope this helps
debby

That doesn't sound like too much food to me! Why are you still on liquids at 5 weeks post op?

 The diet I received when starting the process said clear liquids while in hospital then 1-4 weeks liquids.  The next 4-8 weeks is to be puree'd foods and then 8 - 12 weeks will be "soft"  which would include eggs cottage cheese etc.  When I went for my 2 week post op check the nurse practitioner said liquids until 12/23 which is my next appointment.  

I remember at one of the support group meetings hearing someone laugh saying our doctor would like to keep you on liquids as long as he possibly can and everyone nodded.  At the time I didn't think about that but now I am thinking it is time to move forward.  I miss - believe it or not - brussell sprouts!! 

I was on full liquids for 6 weeks post-op and I too simply had to do something around week five as well. I chose to eat some mashed potatoes the week before my six week check-up and it didn't seem to have a negative impact. I'm not on a regular diet.

 If it's contrary to your doctor's direction then yes you were bad. It's important to follow the process  As for the reason you ate that was where you went wrong in my humble opinion. You have not separated yourself from the way you ate before.

You turned to food for comfort. NOT the way to go. I would suggest going to your monthly support meetings and discussing this. Sorry for being a little harsh, but I don't want to see you fail.

She is five weeks out.  Of course she has not completely separated herself from the way she ate before.  Were you able to do that in just a few weeks?  If so, good for you, but it took most of us years to develop those habits and it will take most of us more than five weeks to develop new, healthier habits.

 thanks Jay.  Not harsh - honest.  And I appreciate that.  I thought my depression was due to needing food and eating would solve the problem.  It didn't.  I just got more guilt.

I completely understand. I'm going to take a guess that your depression is probably over not being able to eat to supress feelings, not that you just can't eat yet. We've all used food to help us deal with things in our lives and, all of a sudden, that coping tool is stripped away from us. Maybe trying to come up with different things you can do when you're depressed might help? Exercising, doing art, journaling, reading, etc, might take the place of feeling that you need food. Just a suggestion...

 

Good luck. You didn't do anything wrong. It's a journey and a process. Who wouldn't feel like they messed up along the way?

 You can probably start walking, that's a great exercise to do and then as soon as your doctor gives the okay to exercise, then I suggest hitting and making that your go to thing instead of food. It continues to do great things for me. I am a little less than one year out and my doctor's goal weight for me was 211. I now way 180, and I feel awesome. When you work so hard to get in shape your mind doesn't want to blow it on food, and the other perk is that you do need to eat more food because of what you burn.

I ran my first 5K in May 2011, and I ran my first 1/2 marathon Thanksgiving morning, and I will run my first Marathon March 18, 2012. Who knows I have friends who want me to run my first IM 70.3 in September with them. All the world's a play ground when you allow it to be.

Good luck, I know you can do it.