Pre-Op Diet and Cooking for family
Hi all, My name is Shannon, and I am on my 5th day of the pre-op diet. My pre-op diet is strickly Bariatric Fusion meal replacement shakes 3-4 time a day. What I am finding the hardest thing right now is cooking meals for my family.
My husband has been so used to me just cooking what i want or what i planned that now that i cant eat it he is getting pissy with me about not making bigger meals for him.
I have tried to be so prepared, and planned alot of things out, but it seems like he didnt understand the changes i would have with food. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with cooking for others now and post op?
Thanks, Shannon
My husband has been so used to me just cooking what i want or what i planned that now that i cant eat it he is getting pissy with me about not making bigger meals for him.
I have tried to be so prepared, and planned alot of things out, but it seems like he didnt understand the changes i would have with food. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with cooking for others now and post op?
Thanks, Shannon
I anticipate this same problem. Although, I am likely to say, "Then cook it your own damn self". I don't have any words of wisdom since I start my pre op diet on Tuesday. I am interested to hear others responses to your question. Maybe it will help prevent me from saying "Then cook it your own damn self". Especially since I am sure my hubby won't enjoy hearing that.
Personally, I would suggest that he cook his own meals while you're on the pre op diet. He's an adult, he can feed himself, right? He can at least use a microwave?
But if you're going to cook for him, then you need to cook a meal that's big enough for him. You didn't expect him to be on a liquid diet with you, did you?
What I do now, as a post op, is cook an entree that I can eat (so something vegetarian, low in carbs, relatively healthy) and I add side dishes like veggies and rice or bread as necessary to make enough food to feed whomever I'm cooking for. I skip the starches myself but I cook them for everyone else.
But if you're going to cook for him, then you need to cook a meal that's big enough for him. You didn't expect him to be on a liquid diet with you, did you?
What I do now, as a post op, is cook an entree that I can eat (so something vegetarian, low in carbs, relatively healthy) and I add side dishes like veggies and rice or bread as necessary to make enough food to feed whomever I'm cooking for. I skip the starches myself but I cook them for everyone else.
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
The issue is, we have been married for 13 years, and He doesnt cook. EVER. he will strave before he cooks something. I do all the cooking, cleaning, shopping, bills, all that fun stuff.
And when I said he is pissy about me making bigger meals for him, im talking about full out meals. Not just Hot dogs or something simple. Also he isnt one to have just one or two servings of a meal, he will eat till it is gone.
Its funny because my son who is 11, is fine with making him self something to eat , sometimes with some instructions.
And when I said he is pissy about me making bigger meals for him, im talking about full out meals. Not just Hot dogs or something simple. Also he isnt one to have just one or two servings of a meal, he will eat till it is gone.
Its funny because my son who is 11, is fine with making him self something to eat , sometimes with some instructions.
I doubt he'd really starve. But if he wants to starve himself, he is an adult, I guess he gets to make that choice. Most people, even really lazy people, will heat up a can of soup or a frozen dinner or order a pizza before they die of malnourishment, though. If he would really starve before he fixes himself something to eat, I recommend he see a good therapist as soon as possible.
In the meantime, it's up to you whether you want to cook large meals for him or not. When I was on my liquid diet, my partner fixed his own meals (and I'm talking about things like soup or frozen dinners, he is not much of a cook, either. But he does not want to starve, he enjoys eating too much for that!).
In the meantime, it's up to you whether you want to cook large meals for him or not. When I was on my liquid diet, my partner fixed his own meals (and I'm talking about things like soup or frozen dinners, he is not much of a cook, either. But he does not want to starve, he enjoys eating too much for that!).
Kelly
Please note: I AM NOT A DOCTOR. If you want medical advice, talk to your doctor. Whatever I post, there is probably some surgeon or other health care provider somewhere that disagrees with me. If you want to know what your surgeon thinks, then ask him or her. Check out my blog.
Whatever you have leftover, freeze in portions. That way, when you're freshly post-op and not cooking, he can reheat those.
Do you have any paperwork from your surgeon or dietician explaining your diet stages? If so, I'd put a copy of it on the front of the fridge, as a reminder to the household that you have different needs going forward. I posted one of the stages on my fridge so when others would ask if I should be eating something, I could quickly and easily point out that yes, I can eat this--it's on my list of approved foods for this stage. That seemed to help those who were concerned about the surgery and what my life was going to be like afterwards. ;)
Good luck!
Do you have any paperwork from your surgeon or dietician explaining your diet stages? If so, I'd put a copy of it on the front of the fridge, as a reminder to the household that you have different needs going forward. I posted one of the stages on my fridge so when others would ask if I should be eating something, I could quickly and easily point out that yes, I can eat this--it's on my list of approved foods for this stage. That seemed to help those who were concerned about the surgery and what my life was going to be like afterwards. ;)
Good luck!
I cook every day. It bothered me right after surgery (I didn't have to do a pre op diet.) I felt kind of resentful that I had to cook things I could not eat. But my family had to eat, and DH, left to his own devices, would eat pizza or scream into a speaker for fast food.
I don't know how long your pre op diet is, but how about making up a big pan of lasagna then freezing it in portions, a pot roast, a pot of chili, or a pan of enchiladas? Things like that can be cooked in bulk. The only break I took from cooking was for the two days I was in the hospital and two days after I came home. And DH ate--you guessed it--pizza. Probably all four days.
He is physically capable of cooking, but he won't do it. At least if you cook in bulk and freeze portions, your family won't be hitting every fast food stand in town or eating cereal out of a mixing bowl.
I don't know how long your pre op diet is, but how about making up a big pan of lasagna then freezing it in portions, a pot roast, a pot of chili, or a pan of enchiladas? Things like that can be cooked in bulk. The only break I took from cooking was for the two days I was in the hospital and two days after I came home. And DH ate--you guessed it--pizza. Probably all four days.
He is physically capable of cooking, but he won't do it. At least if you cook in bulk and freeze portions, your family won't be hitting every fast food stand in town or eating cereal out of a mixing bowl.
I fight badgers with spoons.
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Lol ya pizza and fast food would be his go to. I have tried to make things ahead of time and freeze them, but even then he says ohh i dont want that. I would normally plan out our meals for the week and make some ahead of time, but he doesnt even like to heat things up for himself. Like last night i made dinner for them. He said he didnt want that and made chips with cheese.
I guess im just venting because its like really??? I dont mind cooking for them right now, but do i really want to spend all day cooking something like he is used to. So this week i bought simpler things to make, hot dots, chili, grilled cheese, and all of these are things he would normally eat if that is what i made. I guess its just harder for me to cook them big meals when I cant have them. So the easier to cook, the better for me.
I guess im just venting because its like really??? I dont mind cooking for them right now, but do i really want to spend all day cooking something like he is used to. So this week i bought simpler things to make, hot dots, chili, grilled cheese, and all of these are things he would normally eat if that is what i made. I guess its just harder for me to cook them big meals when I cant have them. So the easier to cook, the better for me.
Yes, I completely relate. DH was Mr. Spoiled Pissy Pants. I'm a good cook, and part of how I got so fat was eating way too much of my own cooking.
Would it help if he got more say in his menu choices? For example, you ask him if he wants burgers (cooked at home of course) or meatloaf. Just like when your kids are little, you give them a choice, but only choices you are willing to get behind.
Just to offer a bit of hope: DH, who was terribly spoiled, has really improved. I think it's because he has seen my steadfast commitment to my eating plan even in the face of his crappy food choices. As I get smaller and healthier, he has gotten better about not being such a diva when it comes to food.
It was hard for me to cook a bunch of big meals too. The only time DH busted out his skills was three weeks after surgery when he made cinnamon rolls from scratch and trashed my kitchen, leaving me with the mess to clean when I came home from work, not to mention two pans of cinnamon rolls. ugh. I could have crowned him.
Would it help if he got more say in his menu choices? For example, you ask him if he wants burgers (cooked at home of course) or meatloaf. Just like when your kids are little, you give them a choice, but only choices you are willing to get behind.
Just to offer a bit of hope: DH, who was terribly spoiled, has really improved. I think it's because he has seen my steadfast commitment to my eating plan even in the face of his crappy food choices. As I get smaller and healthier, he has gotten better about not being such a diva when it comes to food.
It was hard for me to cook a bunch of big meals too. The only time DH busted out his skills was three weeks after surgery when he made cinnamon rolls from scratch and trashed my kitchen, leaving me with the mess to clean when I came home from work, not to mention two pans of cinnamon rolls. ugh. I could have crowned him.
I fight badgers with spoons.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-8255
Suicidepreventionlifeline.org
My DH, is very passive if you ask him what he wants. He will say what ever. Sometimes he might say ohh stuffed shells sounds good, but for the most part with anything we eat or do he says WHATEVER. It drives me crazy.
He is onboard with me having surgery and losing weight but sometimes i wish he was more active with his support. He will not go with me to the gym, or walks, or say anything about what im doing or eating. He is ok with being over weight and he says he loves food and loved to eat. But I am not doing this for him, I am tired of being over weight and not being able to do the things i want to do, like skydiving or rock climbing.
He is onboard with me having surgery and losing weight but sometimes i wish he was more active with his support. He will not go with me to the gym, or walks, or say anything about what im doing or eating. He is ok with being over weight and he says he loves food and loved to eat. But I am not doing this for him, I am tired of being over weight and not being able to do the things i want to do, like skydiving or rock climbing.
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