Buyer remorse again.... Couldn't sleep at all last night

Last night I was so restless that finally I just got out of bed around 2 and watched tv but just kept thinking a out what I did to myself with this surgery.  I started googling if it was possible to reverse the surgery.   I think it's just because I keep reading so many bad things on the computer and getting myself upset.  I have a follow up appointment today wi the dr so maybe I cantell him about my extreme lows,  like I can just cry for no reason.   When does the emotional roller coaster stop?  I also lost 12lbs in one week post op but nothing since then, in fact it seems to go up 1-2lbs some days.  

THings I seem to cry over

my wedding oct 2013, how am I supposed to have a bite of cake, or champagne toast, or any drinks for that matter

never having like a slice of pizza again

never drinking when I'm eating again

the fear of loose skin

that I'm never going to be "normal" aagain

taking the little sips forever

The funny thing is I don't even eat cake but the wedding cake bothers me,  it's like I sit and read this list and no that I am crazy beingso upset.....   Was anyone else like this in the first month?  

Does it help to know that most people can have a bite of cake (or a few bites, at least) if they want to?  I do dump on too much sugar but I can easily handle a few bites of cake.

There's no reason you can never have pizza again.  Some people handle thin crust better than thick crust, and some choose to just eat the toppings off the pizza.  I'm planning on having pizza tonight for dinner in fact, and will probably eat two slices, but only some of the crust.

Most people don't have to take little sips forever.  I can drink normally now.

Thank you. Between cries I laugh at myself for these things bothering me, that's why I think I'm really going crazy 

Take a deep breath!  The scale is going to move.  Did you take your measurements, if so measure, if not then measure today and start doing this going forward.  For many when the scale isn't moving the inches are melting off.

You can have a bite of cake for your wedding and a sip of champagne if you choose to.  Jus****ch how much, too much may make you sick and you don't want to be sick on your day.

You will have pizza again.

You should never drink while eating, but I'll tell you as time goes this gets easier and becomes a habit.

You look young which is to your benefit for lose skin.  Even if you do have it think about it, wouldn't you rather have some lose skin then be overweight and have the health consequences.

What's normal?  I feel normal, eat like a normal healthy person.

You won't have to sip forever either, as you get further out your intake will increase.  I have no problems taking fairly large drinks.

What you are going through is somewhat normal for post-ops.  MANY go through it, your hormones are out of wack.  If you need help during this time talk to your doctor about getting meds to help you.

I was on a really crazy rollercoaster in the month following my surgery, mostly because I couldn't take my antidepressant until I was cleared for pills. It's scary--you suddenly have a whole new way of eating to deal with and the psychological impact of that is heavy. Hopefully your doctor can offer some advice about coping with those extreme lows. For me, it began to taper off once my diet expanded to the soft food stage, and by the time I was 4 months out I was feeling really good.

As to living your life, well, let me tell you that I have gained more than I ever lost. I went to Italy with my parents to see my brother in an opera and had a blast! I tasted almost everything, but only one bite for most things. There were wonderful, fresh, accessible foods in Florence and it was easy to find something like chicken cacciatore, cioppino, or a caprese salad. We were in New Orleans last year and while I wasn't putting back hurricanes on bourbon street, I was shooting raw oysters, enjoying gumbo, and partying along with everyone else.

In terms of food restrictions, the only thing I can't eat is ice cream. It makes me feel terrible. But I have a slice of pizza here and there, and I had a couple small bites of cake at my wedding. The normalcy takes a long time, but if you met me now you'd never know I had surgery. You'd just think that I have a small appetite. I eat a healthy diet with all of the food groups, I just do it with little dessert-plate portions.

Yes, I have loose skin. It's not a bother to me. I'd rather have some batwings and droopy thighs than the 280 lbs. I used to have hanging on me. I look ridiculous in a two piece bathing suit and wear one anyway because seriously, if you're going to judge me for that they're projecting their own insecurities.

I guess what this boils down to is YES, it gets better. Much, much better. In time, the good will outweigh the bad and you'll be glad you took this chance. Best of luck at your follow-up and best wishes for future success!

Its funny you mentioned anti depressants. I haven't been cleared for pills yet and I promise I am losing it. And on top of that my father died yesterday I am a ball of emotions. How did you cope without your meds?

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Please accept my deepest sympathies.

It was difficult without medication. I kept in touch with my therapist and had to use a lot of distraction / re-framing tactics when the symptoms flared up. Honestly, I tried to keep busy. I had an internship, a job, performed in a musical, and concentrated on learning my new lifestyle.

I hope that you find your inner peace and are able to find healthy ways to cope with all the many emotions you must be experiencing. Remember above all to have compassion for yourself.

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. No wonder you are a ball of emotions. I wish I had an answer for you but I'm sure someone else will chime in. I hope you feel better soon

I'm so sorry to hear about to your loss. 

never having like a slice of pizza again- I eat pizza and eat it often and cake

never drinking when I'm eating again- you will get used to this

the fear of loose skin- this one was true for me, but I has some plastics and the rest I can live with

that I'm never going to be "normal" again- I do think of myself as finally eating like a normally thin person

taking the little sips forever- after about 6 months, I was able to gulp like I did pre-op