Annoying People

I am a couple days shy of 9 months out.  I'm down over 100 pounds.  Why do "fat" comments still bother me?  Because it's freaking rude, insensitive and judgmental.  That's why.  What is worse?  When the nasty comments come out of someone you like's mouth.

I work in a Family Practice office, as a biller.  I rarely go to the front because my job can be done primarily without leaving my private office.  One of our receptionists has ALWAYS had a bad habit of talking smack behind our patient's backs.  THIS DRIVES ME NUTS!  She makes comments like "well, if she'd stop eating so much" or "maybe put your fat ass kid on a diet" or "he could afford his copay if he skipped the fast food once in a while".  You get the picture.  When I was MO, these comments bothered me tremendously.  I just couldn't speak up.  She and I would talk about my weight, at lunch time, and she'd say "but I just don't see you that way.  You're my friend.  I see Hollie, not a MO person."

Now, that I'm thinner, these comments are bothering me even more.  I just want to shout at her and say "You can fix fat, but you can't fix ugly"!!!   She's my coworker & it's a small office, so I probably won't say it.  BUT I WANT TO SOOOO BAD!! 

grrr.

yikes thats horrible. I can imagine what they say about me at the dr lol. Has anyone else heard her say these things? im sure the DRs wouldnt be thrilled. btw congrats on losing over 100 lbs :) thats awesome

Thank you!!  It still doesn't feel real, yet.

I know it's horrible.  The whole front desk has heard her.  In fact, a patient overheard her a couple weeks ago talking about someone's "fat ass kid".  Sigh.

Honestly If you are not the Office Manager  I would say something to the OM.  Comments like that are hostile and would make me uncomfortable.  Not to mention if a patient heard it.    I have worked in the health care industry for many years and I would not have tolerated that in my office.

What about just saying something like "You know, that's pretty rude."  Or "I feel very offended when you talk about patients that way."  Or "I think it's unkind and unprofessional to talk about our patients like that."  Or even "It hurts my feelings when you say those things."

That is creating a hostile office environment and could be considered harassment. If you don't feel comfortable bringing it up with her, I'd say it's worth going to a superior or to human resources and reporting the situation. I know that comes along with all of its own issues and understand why you'd hesitate.

Perhaps she is projecting her own fears or frustrations. If you'd rather not take the approach of telling her that the comments bother you, next time she says something like "if she'd stop eating so much," just say something like, "Well yes, but that is much easier said than done, don't you think?" or "I really feel for her if she's struggling. I know how difficult it can be." Instead of confronting or accusing, you're sympathizing with her target and it might shame her into being a little less judgmental.

Show goodness and be polite. Some people are just jerks, and I feel bad for them. She must spend a lot of time unhappy if she's making so many negative comments.

Neen....I love this post and I will try the siding with her target!!  It's hard to start controversy in such a small office.  However, this might be a good way to bring it to her attention without accusing her.  THANKS!!!

Like!

Also, I would stop seeing a doctor if I heard his or her staff make any such comments, and I would put it in writing as to why, so the doctor would know why I went elsewhere.

I would, too.  Unfortunately, I can't just leave since I work here....lol.  The doc, himself, is an awesome person!

LOL  I should have been more clear. I meant that this employee is having a potentially negative impact on the doc's livelihood, and I bet he doesn't know it. And I imagine he would be pretty unhappy to lose patients because of it.

But anyway, it's a rotten situation for sure.