Baffled...

One of my closest friends had bypass surgery over a year ago after having huge issuse with lap band (Dr was really bad).  I was there with her thru thick and thin helping her research and goign to all appts and everything.  While we no longer live in the same state , I am baffled and hurt that she has not wanted to be a part of my journey, not once has she reached out to me or checked in.  Colour me baffled....

How is she doing now?  If she's not doing good with her weight loss it could be that she is ashamed/guilty/jealous or all of the above.  It sounds like you were a supportive friend when she needed it most and I can understand you are feeling hurt now.  Perhaps you could send her a heartfelt note telling her you accept her wherever she is and would like to continue your friendship.  If you get no response then you still have all of us here who will gladly lend you support through this process.  You might also find a local support group as well - unfortunately I don't have any nearby but enjoy all the online support I get.  

I have come to realize people are self absorbed sometimes.Or they don't want to look at themselves.Don't let this hurt you.Keep working your program and keep up the healthy choices in your new life you started.

It is disappointing but some friends are a one way street.  Since you no longer live close try to find new friends.  Good luck on your WLS.

There are givers and there are takers. I think we gravitate to our opposites many times.  It's sad this has happened to you since you were there for her.  If you think back over your friendship you might find you were likely the one doing most of the giving and you just never noticed this before.  You always have support here and should focus on the people that are rooting for you and not those that are so much into themselves.

It is very interesting to see who checks in on you.I had some really close friends and they haven't really checked on me.I think sometimes we are the stronger part of the friendship and they have to lean on us maybe.Where they think we are fine and don't need anything.This is just one theory maybe?

That has to be a confusing set of cir****tances. And because I know you, I just cannot imagine a good friend of yours who is not in touch.  Did she get on the wrong helicopter and end up here? http://www.gi.alaska.edu/AlaskaScienceForum/article/most-remote-spot-alaska

It's true that there are friends we each have *****ally don't know how to allow themselves to communicate freely and may never imagine that you, who is amazingly strong, independent and capable, just might need some TLC.

I hope you won't give up on her ad your friendship but accept it for what it is. 

You actually are extra-special!!!