The Journey of Losing Weight/Maintenance

Sep 28, 2010

I go through periods where I'm a scale slave.  When I was losing weight, weighing myself once a day was very important for me staying on track.  Now that I'm nine years post-op, I'm much more in tune with my body.  I know when I'm up just by the way my body feels and how my clothes fit.  I've toyed with still weighing daily and also weighing once a week and even once a month.

Honestly, losing weight was easier than maintenance is. When I was losing weight, the difference was amazing.  Every day was an adventure.  I was rapidly changing clothes sizes, wearing sizes I never remember wearing before.  The comments of people were such a high.  Now, in maintenance, it is more difficult, certainly not the "cake walk" (sorry, for that food reference) or no brainer I thought it would be.  I really have to combat "oh just this bite" or "just this once" or "I'll get back on track tomorrow" - ick, the back on track tomorrow one is so much like my old diet mentality.

Maintenance is much different than I thought it would be.  I thought it would be a no brainer.  I arrived!  It isn't.  It is still work, many times hard work.  There aren't necessarily the highs you get when losing weight, getting down a size and the excitement of WOW moments.  I thought maintenance would be fairly effortless; it isn't. 

I don't mean to be negative here.  I was just thinking about the difference in losing weight and maintenance, and how different they are.  I'm not complaining because I am deeply grateful to be in maintenance.  It is just different and honestly more of an effort than I thought it would be.  Although, that effort is a gift every single day.

In some ways, I'm grateful for the journey of being morbidly obese - having surgery - losing weight - maintenance because it really has taught me so much about myself.  Years ago, I had a friend that was one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen.  In my mind, she had it all - beautiful and thin.  Yet she was pretty empty inside.  She was very superficial.  Her depth began and ended with her externals.  Looking back, she was very self-centered and so concerned with what she was wearing and how she looked.  I remember admiring her wishing I was like her.

Fast forward years ahead to today.  There is NO WAY I want to be like her.  Actually, thanks to the journey of being morbidly obese and the path it has taken me to where I am today, I'm grateful to be me.  The journey has made me much more compassionate and caring, more insightful and aware of my emotions and actions, has made me goal-oriented and caused me to be able to work for OH plus add to my career of being a PCC accredited coach.  If I had been that person I knew years ago, I wouldn't live the life I have today.  

Sure, I get down, frustrated and still struggle with emotional eating/head hunger.  But today, I have the tools to combat that habit but use the underlying reasons to my benefit.  It is important to me what I look like but I'm not obsessed with my externals but am more concerned with my insides and who I am as a person and achieving my dreams.  I don't know where that person is today but I know where I am.  I wouldn't trade lives with her for anything.  I love my life and who I am today.  All because I started out on the WLS journey.

Enjoying the journey.....

Cathy
www.mydailyminutes.com

3 Comments