9 More Days

Oct 28, 2011

.......and counting until November 7th, the date of my surgery. Unfortunately, I have had the week from hell, and have been too busy to be excited. It's been in the back of my mind, but not at the forefront where it ought to be I guess.
My dad had a heart attack a week ago while getting his boat and camper winterized...120 miles from home. He was flown initally to a hospital 150 miles from here, so for the first few days, I was driving up there. He got transferred to a hospital closer to home and the next day underwent triple bypass, and he is doing so well. It was a scare for us. Hopefully enough of one for him that he will stop smoking. He's smoked for 50 years. Time to quit.

Needless to say, I've only made it to the gym twice since last Saturday. I know I shouldn't be neglecting myself during all of this, but let's face it, by the time I get home at night, I'm completely wiped out. And when I walk in to find a sink full of dishes, baskets of laundry and just things thrown around everywhere, I pretty much don't have a lot of time. But I did eek in two visits and will be going this morning. So there's my 3 a week minimum. I go weigh in on November 1st and get measured. I know I've lost some inches because my clothes are fitting looser. And according to my home scale, I've dropped 10 lbs since starting the program last month.
Try telling that to my surgeons office though. I saw them 2 days ago. My very first visit with them was a year ago in November. I weighed 276 at the time. They told me to lose 10 lbs. I now weigh 292. So, yeah, I went the wrong way. This was my first visit to them since May. I saw them right after my hysterectomy and had lost 3 lbs and was down to 273. The summer came and went, I had no visits to the surgeon. I had met my 6 month requirement for the insurance, so they didnt feel there was any "need" for me to come in any more until my insurance approval. So, during that time, my husband changed jobs and we had to pay for COBRA coverage all summer for our insurance until August when he was covered by his new employer. I told the coordinator at my surgeons office that we were covered and to go ahead and submit for approval. She refused to do it until our NEW insurance became effective. I have no idea why. So I was a sitting duck so to speak all summer long. In fact, I lost all hope that I was ever even GETTING this surgery done. No motivation. Laziness. Whatever it was, I gained weight. I am an "accountablility" person. I need to be accountable to someone when it comes to weight loss. During that time, I was accountable to nobody. So, we're looking at 5 months passing that I had no contact with my bariatric surgeons office. I honestly thought they'd forgotten me. So, I really felt like I was going to have to find another surgeon and start over again when our new insurance started up. I did finally get a phone call from their office asking if our new insurance was in effect, and it was. They kicked it into high gear then. Got all of my tests done and got clearance from my PCP. Then Oct. 27 was my final appointment with my surgeons office before surgery. I was not treated really well to say the least. I got the clear impression that if my surgery wasn't already scheduled, I would not be having it on November 7th. The dietition was my biggest supporter that day. She gave me a really strict diet to follow that when followed to the letter, will get 7 lbs per week off. I am mostly doing diet shakes, but for my dinner I chose something off of her menu. Since Thursday I have lost 4 lbs. The doc didnt ask me to, but the dietition wants me to come in next Saturday to weigh in just so she can SHOW him that I did lose weight and that I tried and made the effort. She asked me why I thought I had put on the weight, and I was honest...lack of accountability. When I told the nurse practitioner I had actually gotten over the 300lb mark, she nearly fell over. She has kind of had a "threatening" nature all along with me. "Get down to 266 or he probably won't do your surgery," and that sort of thing. Even back in May, her attitude was doubtful that I'd even get down to that weight in time for my surgery. And that would be when? At that point, there was no date set, no promise of one being set, and no cooperation from the coordinator to even submit for approval. My doctor went over all my labs, which were all fantastic, but told me to keep losing weight until the day of surgery. He doesn't REQUIRE a liquid diet beforehand, but told me it would not be a bad idea. I walked out of the office feeling so bad. It was just not the "uplifting, yeah, here we go" type of appointment I was expecting I guess. I've been working hard at the gym for the past month, and I told them that, but the attitude was kind of like "Well, you should have been doing that all along." And I SHOULD have. But I didn't. After the week I had with my dad and then my car's entire brake system needs replaced, and neglecting my own family and my poor husband who just got out of the hospital from his VSG the day before my dad's heart attack, I just wanted to slap the nurse practitioner and say "Look lady...let me tell ya about MY day." I've never liked her much from the start, but I really didn't like her that day. I feel this way about it....this is a bariatric center. You have to take a certain approach with people like us. Be supportive. Be upbeat. BE NICE!!! I'm not saying you have to be a cheerleader for God's sake, but at least have something NICE to say. My husband never seemed to have a problem with her, but then again, he was only required to lose 5 lbs and he did. After his surgery, he didn't walk as much as he should have, because he didnt feel like it, and he's not walking much now even though he is cleared to do cardio stuff like a treadmill or a stationary bike. Yet they had the NERVE to tell me he was their "star patient!!" I sweat my butt off at the gym (on a normal week) 4-5 days per week. And HE'S the STAR? Wow. I just really wanted to scream. But all that crap aside, and now that things are calming down in my life, I am starting to get a renewed sense of excitement now for my surgery. My husband is doing well, but tired of his liquid diet, and is looking forward to graduating to soft foods this week. As far as his eating goes, he's done everything to the letter and not cheated at all. He's lost 12 lbs since his VSG and probably would lose more if he'd get up and move. He had a bad case of "head hunger" the other day, but he made it through just fine. I am totally fine sticking to diet shakes and veggies and fruit until surgery day. I might be a little mad about the way things have gone, but the end result is, I have my surgery date and I'm dropping weight before hand, and I am getting this done. Whatever it takes, right?

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