Help I feel like I am sinking.

Feb 23, 2011

Well here go's. It is now February and I have gained 16 pounds back sence December. What the heck am I doing to myself. I feel like I am sinking and I can't get it back together. I get on the scales and all they do is go up and down. I am still wearing a size 14 from a 28 in my pants. but the weight is just not coming off.  It has been 18 month sence I had my surgery. I can't fail now. I am so imbaraced of my failure. I am hoping I have not stretched my stomach out.  I find myself snacking all day long agian. I really think I need to talk to a phyc but not sure how to go about it. New insurance and I can't even get a new doctor to help me still here in Kansas. I have not been able to see a doctor sence my 1 year visit to Dr, Farhan and this sucks. Guess I am just feeling alittle rough right now. One good note I did get a new job. I signed all the papers and I will be starting March 9th. Hard thing is it is still in the food because that is all I know. I will be a baker/ Decorator/Customer server for GIGI"S CUPCAKES in Overland Park Kansas. Hoping this will change my moods and help me get back on track. My daughter and Granddaughter are moving out on the 1st of March because my husband is an a__ and tolded her she needed to get her own place. She is only 21 and trying raise my grandbaby on her own. I am going to try to work and be there for her too. Day care is just too much. But then I have the hubby pulling me from the other end saying I don't spend time with him.  I just don't know what to do anymore. I know one thing my granddaughter is the one thing that has keep me going. She is going to be 4 in March and she is amazing. Sorry I am venting agian but I don't know where to go or have anyone to talk to anymore. Knowone understands me here in my home. 

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