facing truths

Nov 15, 2010

I have sung in a community choir for 6 or 7 years. I've been an active member, serving on the board of directors. Music is really something that soothes me, relaxes me, lets me be who i want to be. This September, tho, i didnt go back. I sent an email to the director, and the president of the choir, saying that i wasn't coming back. I felt badly, leaving them like that (i had been in charge of publicity, they'd have to find someone else to do that job). I told them, and myself, that i just couldnt handle the politics of what had been going on ( i wont go into it here, its really not that important). Over the last couple of weeks, tho, i've come to realize that it wasn't just the politics. The primary reason i quit is because i can't stand the way i look in a skirt. Our "uniform" for performances is a black blouse and skirt. Our director insists that we tuck in our blouses. I stand in the front row of the choir. I just couldnt do it. I can't do the tucking, i can't do the pantyhose, i just can't do it. I want to go back to my choir, but i can't go back, looking the way i do.

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