Love...Hate...Food????

Mar 27, 2010

So I'm just over 5 weeks post-op.  I won't lie, it's been rough. My surgery experience has humbled me and made me realize that I am not the "exception" that I thought I was.  I thought I would be on my feet in 2 weeks feeling great and ready to conquer the world.  Boy was I wrong.  I very much remember being in the hospital feeling like I just wanted to die and be put out of my misery...that's how bad I was feeling.  Anyway, I digress.

I really wanted to discuss the love/hate relationship I have with food right now.  Which is interesting since the reason I chose the DS is because I LOVE food.  I mean we all do right?  That's why we are here.  The reason I chose the DS over the other surgeries is because of the lifestyle it allows you afterwards. The most normal eating. I'll be able to eat what I wan't, in moderation of course.

So that makes my current state of mind very interesting to me. Now, I realize that everything I go through right now is pretty temporary, but there is also a psychological element to this thing as well that is best not to ignor. After all, the surgery is on our body, not our head and you have to deal with your issues with food or you will not be successfull in the long run.

So once you start eating again post-op, you progress through phases. I went from getting absolutely nothing for 24 hours after surgery (which seemed unusually cruel because I was violently thirsty and just wanted ice chips or a drop of water) to little shot glasses of clear liquids and jello to broth and soups then on to soft foods like yogurt and runny mashed potatoes and scrambles eggs.

What I found interesting and unexpected was that I was hungry from day 1. I was having violent, aggressive hunger pangs so I was "eating" about every 30 minutes.  Oh, it was only a couple of teaspons at a time of whatever but every 30 minutes or so.  But that caused me to get really sick of the things I was consuming. If I never have chicken broth again that will be fine with me.

When I had my first scrambled egg it was wonderful, but I was sick of eggs within a week and have given them up entirely wondering if they contribute to my migraines.  I used to eat eggs every day pre-op. I never thought I would ever give them up. Go figure!

I am eating regular food now, for the most part. I am incorporating things back slowly as advised to see how they affect me.  I have not had steak yet but look forward to it.  I find that so many things though no longer taste the same.  I try things that in concept, sound like they should taste good, and then they don't. And then I can eat so little of things, it hardly seems worth the effort to prepare.  For all of the brainpower I have to put into to figuring out what I can eat, sometimes it just seems easier not to eat.  I know that is really lame and pretty lazy but I guess it is just frustration.

For days I had been craving a salad.  A Zaxby's Blackened Blue Chicken Zalad to be exact.  I was going crazy so I just went ahead and got it. I was concerned because of what I had read on the DS board about some folks having problems with salad and lettuce. So I dished out some of the salad in a small bowl and put the mediteranean dressing on it. I made the mistake of also eating half of the texas toast that comes with it.  I ate it slowly and chewed it very well.  I waited over an hour and I was fine. No problems no issues.  I ate some more of the salad.  Several hours went by. All was well.  No gas, no bloating.  I was thrilled.  I love salad. It was a staple of my pre-op diet and I was excited to find something healthy that I could eat with no issues.

Unfortunately, at 2am, I found myself in the bathroom, taking the Brown's to the Superbowl, as one of my college buddies used to say. And then again at 5am.  My dilemma, is that I don't know if it was the salad, or the texas toast, or if this was a perfectly normal bowel movement.  I am determined to try the salad again. But without the texas toast.  Hey! It's too importatn to me!

So forgive this rambling post but I just wanted to talk about this weird relationship that I have with food now.  I love it, but I hate it.  I'd almost rather not eat than have to figure out what to eat and whether or not something is going to taste good or how it's going to affect me.  I really look forward to not being such a newb!

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About Me
Atlanta, GA
Location
23.2
BMI
DS
Surgery
02/17/2010
Surgery Date
Aug 22, 2009
Member Since

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