11/2/04

God is good ALL the time and ALL the time, God is GOOD!

I HAVE A DATE!!!!  November 10,2004!!!!  Yakima called me almost as soon as I got home yesterday to give me the news!  It was almost funny because she kept saying things like "I don't want to put a rush on you" and "Are you going to have time to get things straightened out at work?"  She's so sweet.  :)  I've had my stuff ready since the day that I saw my Approval!  I had already planned for Friday (11/5) to be my last day at work and made plans according to that.  I go in for my Pre-op session tomorrow with Dr. Fields and I meet with Dr. Duncan and pre-register at the hospital on Thursday! 

There is no doubt that I serve an AWESOME God.  He keeps moving mountains for me time after time after time!  He's given me patience when I was over zealous, peace where there was chaos, and  faith where there was doubt.  This journey has definitely helped me build a stronger relationship with God.  I've learned that when you can't depend on man, you can depend on Him.  He is always there for you and will always have your back.  I can look back on this journey and say that through it all, there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.  He's carried me all the way.

11/3/04

I went in for my Pr-op session with Dr. Fields today.  It wasn't bad, just looooong.  My appointment was for 10:30 ad I arrived at about 10.  I signed in and paid my co-pay.  I was waiting to be called back when Jackie noticed that my file was missing the pre-op questionnaire and consent form.  She said that the forms should have been given to me when I met with the doctor.  I told that I'd never met with the doctor, just Michelle, the P.A.  How could I be there for pre-op if I'd ever met with the doctor was her question.  Come to find out, my sessions were scheduled backwards.  Oops.  I'm not complaining because if Yakima hadn't worked so hard to get me in there, my surgery date could have been a lot further off.  I told her that I didn't mind and I could fill out the forms now since I was already there.  She gave them to me and I filled them out... all FOURTEEN pages.  Fourteen pages of info that you have to summarize and comment on to make sure that you're aware of each thing.  After that, I spoke to Dr. Fields.  She answered all my questions and then sent me down to have my testing done. 

So, I get downstairs, sign in and wait to be called.  When they call me back, we went to the little triage/'give me your insurance info' desk.  I told the guy that I was here for testing and that I would be doing the pre-admission stuff tomorrow.  Nope, he said.  You need to do it before you go to testing.  Okay. My appointments were flip-flopped anyway, so the surprise had already subsided.  They took all of my info and I made my co-pay.  In case you're wondering,  I have an HMO so I had to pay $220 out of pocket.  After that, I got my copies and my wristband and was sent off to testing.  So while I'm waiting for the nurse to come in, I'm looking at the television - their showing everything leading up to John Kerry's concession speech.  She  comes in and starts going on about the election. About how she didn't particularly like Kerry, but she voted for Edwards and how he was such a cutie.  Ooookay.  She was a character!  :)  After all the election talk, she had me give a urine sample, took my vitals, took more blood, did an EKG and then sent me to have a chest x-ray done.  After that, I free to go home.  Sounds like a nice, quick visit, right?  Wrong!  I got there at 10 and finally left at 3 something.  The waiting is what gets you.  Be sure to take a good book to help pass the time!

11/4/04

Back to the office to meet with Dr. Duncan!  I arrived at about 9:15 to see an office full of people. Oh boy.  It wasn't too bad though.  They eventually called everyone back to the little classroom for the 'educational portion'.  Susan Cali from the Wellness Center came over to talk to us about the days leading up our procedure and what to expect.  When Susan finished, Dr. Duncan came in to talk to us - or as he puts it, to talk us out of the surgery.  His portion of the meeting focused mostly on the complications of the surgery and preparing beforehand for the worst because nothing is guaranteed.  I appreciate his candid and straight forward manner and it IS super important to have your affairs in order before proceeding to have any type of major surgery.  I can honestly say that I never thought about death as an option, if that makes sense.  I feel - no, I know - that God has lead me here for a reason and death is not it.  I'm here to obtain a tool to help me become a healthier and more productive person.  I still have work to do and God is not finished with me yet.  I have faith that he will bring me through without complications. 

When Dr. Duncan finished, Yakima came in to talk to everyone to make sure that our files were complete.  I just knew that everything was in mine, but nope.  They need an updated Letter of Recommendation for my PCP.  I don't why, but okay.  Guess what?  My doctor's on vacation and they need it today or tomorrow!  Now I've already taken off yesterday and most of today.  I can't very well take off Friday, too.  I have to get some work done before my leave starts.  (Oh... speaking of leave... I gave Dr. Fields the forms that I need to submit for Short Term Disability so that still have some funds coming in because I'm taking 4 weeks leave.  I didn't get them back yesterday and Yakima told me today that it can take up to 3 days to have them completed AND they charge $15 to fill them out.  My question was can I fill them out and have the doctor sign them?  Unfortunately, the answer was no.)  So, I left a message at my doctor's office and someone is supposed to call me back.  I've already gone to the Lord in prayer that everything will work out just fine. 

Even, with the unexpected things happening, I was blessed to meet Sabrina L. at the session.  During our conversations, we found out that we live like less than 10 minutes apart!  Her surgery is on Monday, 11/8.  She's not on OH, but if you happen to read this could you please send up a few words of prayer on her behalf?  Thanks!  :)

11/5/04

I got a call from Meka, who is my PCP's assistant, this morning.  I told her the situation and asked if the letter could just be updated for me.  Nope, she says.  I need to make an appointment to come in.  That's all well and good with me, but it needs to be first thing Monday morning, because Dr. Duncan's office needed this like yesterday.  So she squeezed me in at 9am.  I'll get to see my doctor, then head over to Dr. D's office to drop off the letter and pick up my paperwork, then head home to toss back my Fleets.  Ewwww.  I've heard so many bad things about bowel prep that I am dreading it!  But everyone has to do it and, truth be told, I'd drink two or three bottles of it with no chaser if I had to!  :)

11/7/04

Oh boy!  It's Sunday, 11/7, about 5:15pm.  Everything going on right now just seems kind of surreal.  Today is my last day of 'food freedom', so to speak.  I begin my bowel prep tomorrow and my surgery is Wednesday morning.  WOW!  I'm still digesting that it's finally here and it's really going to happen.  :)  Tomorrow morning I make my last rounds - to my doctor's office, then to Dr. Duncan's office and finally to my job so I can finalize everything.  I'm pretty sure that this will be my last post until after surgery, so I'll be keeping a written journal of everything between now and when I'm back online.  I'm also going to take my 'official' pre-op pic and measurements tomorrow and I'll post them when I get back.  Thank you OH and BAF for all of your support and emails.  They've been a tremendous help and comfort during this journey.

I don't know if anyone remembers my confession that I mentioned a ways back, but I've since added to it as I've progressed in my journey.

I am a child of God and I am what He says I am.

I am Blessed.

I am Beautiful.

I am Cherished.

I am Chosen.

I am Healthy.

I am Intelligent.

I am Motivated.

I am Protected.

I am Worthy.

More than anything, I am LOVED

because I am a child of God and I am what He says I am!

I'll see you all on the other side!  :)

Pre-op Photos (taken in August 2004 at my beginning weight of 285 lbs.)

11/15/04

I am a child of God and I am what He says I am.

I am a "LOSER"! :)

Here's a quick update:

I'm 5 days post-op and feeling great!  Other than some lingering gas, I feel pretty normal.  I've progressed from clear to full liquids and have tolerated everything that I've tried so far (applesauce and watered-down mashed potatoes).  I got out on Saturday for my first big walk around Wal-Mart.  Since then, Target and Wal-Mart have been chosen as my daily walking grounds.  This week, I'm taking it to the mall.  I'll update later this week about the hospital stay and the first few days post-op.  I just wanted to stick my head in and say thanks for all of the support, visits and phone calls.  Thanks!!!! :)

11/20/04

How have I missed my computer?  Let me count the ways. :) I'm just under two weeks post-op and finally have a chance to write the details of the past couple of weeks.

11/10/04 - I arrived at the hospital with my fiancé at 6:30am and checked in.  I was taken to my room (where I noticed Dr. Hobson's name on the door instead of Dr. Duncan's) to change, have my IV started and received my first of three Heparin shots that I would get over the course of my stay.  Dewayne and I were in the room about an hour watching cartoons and talking until the nurse came by to take me up to the OR holding area.  This is where Dewayne and I had to separate and I tell you, you would have thought that he was the one going under and not me.  I spent a few minutes reassuring him that everything would be alright and that I would see him soon... serious role reversal.  I was wheeled into the holding area with about four other people and waited... and waited.  Finally, my OR nurse comes over and introduces herself and asks if I have any questions.  Yes, I do.  Who is Dr. Hobson and why isn't Dr. Duncan doing my surgery?  She says that due the scheduling something something.  Right, okay.  But you're not knocking me out until I at least meet the man who'll be re-routing my insides.  No problem, she says.  While waiting for her to find Dr. Hobson, the anesthesiologist comes by and tells me what to expect.  Basically, I'll be receiving two shots - the first one to make me feel like I'm in Margarita-ville and the second to knock me out.  Sounds good.  So Dr. Hobson comes by right after and introduces himself.  He's a really nice guy and made good eye contact which is super important to me.  He goes over everything with me, answers my questions and NEVER rushed me.  After our conversation, I'm ready to be wheeled down to the Operating Room.  They give me this little ugly hair net thing to put on and off we go.  In the OR I scoot over to the table and the anesthesiologist tells me "Here's your Margarita!"  As soon as it hit, I felt a little woozy, then nothing.  I woke up in the recovery room really groggy and sleepy.  Mind you, I go sleep when I take two Advil, so needless to say that I was really out of it.  I remember the clock being just to the right of my bed and it reading 1:30 and the next time I was able to look up at it, it read like 3:20.  I know that the first thing out of my mouth was "Where's Dewayne?" because I knew he had to be having fits by now.  My recovery nurse/guy told me that they had already called him and told him that I would be on my way up to my room shortly and that he was waiting on me.  The nurse started getting my paperwork ready for me to be transported to my room and a few minutes later, I was on my way up.  

I'm not sure what time I got my room, but my sweetie was there in the hallway waiting on me.  He is such a doll.  When I got settled in to my hospital bed, they let him come in and he gave me the biggest smile I'd ever seen on him.  *Dewayne is not a smiler*  He'd been so supportive and cooperative with everything that I asked of him even though he didn't really want me to go through with the surgery.  I know his objection to WLS was because he didn't want anything to happen to me and I am so blessed to have him in my life.  God couldn't have sent me a better man to be my husband.

After settling in my room, the nurses let me rest for a while with the compression hose on.  I wish I could have brought those home with me!  My day nurse, Kay, came in to remove the catheter and to get me up to walk.  I was a little wobbly at first, but I made it down to the nurses station and back.  BIG thank you to Vanessa who stopped in to check on me and accompanied me on my first walk.  She was even sweet enough to hang out with me for a while Dewayne ran out.  After that, it was basically rest then walk, rest then walk for the rest of the evening.  My angel, Kerstin, came by to check on me and keep me company for a while.  Let me say that both Vanessa and Kerstin look FABULOUS!  Talk about providing inspiration!  Dr. Duncan came by to check on me, as well.  I was little miffed about that since he didn't actually do my surgery, but oh well.

So, after walking a good little bit, I was finally able to go to the bathroom on my own.  Yea!  I didn't have a lot of pain, just discomfort.  I only had to use my pain pump once and that was only because I wanted to go back to sleep.  Most of the discomfort was caused by gas.  I couldn't burp or pass gas that first day and it drove me crazy.  My night nurse, Nita, gave me something that was supposed to help the air pass, but it didn't work that night.  I watched TV that night with Dewayne (the nerve of ANTM to boot Toccara!!), then it was lights out.

11/11/04 - I got up a couple of times during early, early morning to use the bathroom, but still no air passed.  The morning nurse, whose name I didn't write down, came to give me another Heparin shot and told me that I could get washed up and ready to go down for my Leak Test. 

After getting ready, I was wheeled down to Radiology (I think) and I waited... and waited... and waited.  Finally, I was taken back to do my test.  The stuff you have to drink tastes like some really old, rank lemonade and it wouldn't have been so bad if the dr. hadn't told me "Don't swallow yet... just hold it in your mouth until I tell you to swallow it."  What????  Ewwww... nasty!  After that, it was back up to my room for more walking and TV.  I made Dewayne go to work for a little while so he wouldn't have cabin fever from being cooped up in the hospital for so long.  By then it was about 12 or so and I just finished walking down the hall and the some of the air finally passed!  TMI... I know, but if you've been through it, then you know where I'm coming from.  After that, it was on... air left and right.  When the air finally subsided for a while I was able to have my first bowel movement.  I didn't know that the hospital will not discharge you if have not had a bowel movement. (My new friend, Selena, who was in the room right next door, had to stay a few extra days because of that, but she's doing well now.)  About an hour later, I got my second apple/cranberry juice cocktail and was given my walking papers!

The ride home felt a lot bumpier than usual, but it was tolerable.  I slept the rest of Thursday away... until wrestling came on.  I was able to sleep in my bed that first night, but only for a couple of hours at a time.  Every time I woke up, I walked around the house.  Dr. Duncan scared the bejesis out of me talking about those blood clots!

11/12/04 -  I stayed indoors the entire day and walked around the house.  I wasn't hungry or thirsty, but I did get some water in and some diluted juice.  I slept a little longer Friday night, about 3 hours at a time and my discomfort was easing more everyday.  I didn't even get my prescription for the pain meds filled.

11/13/04 - Saturday I woke up feeling pretty good.  I got in the shower, put on some real clothes and was ready to see the world again.  Dewayne, Christin and I went to Wal-mart so I could get a couple things and walk a little bit.  I felt pretty normal and probably did more than I should have, because when I got home, I went straight to sleep.  When it was time to eat... or drink, really... I couldn't bear the thought of another glass of apple juice, so Dewayne fixed me instant mashed potatoes.  He thinned them out a good little bit and they went down just fine.  He measured out, I think, 3 oz. But I couldn't really tell if I was full or not so I just stopped.

11/14/04 - Sunday was the first day that I didn't look like an old lady getting out of bed.  I slept pretty comfortably and felt relatively normal.  I slept about 5 hours continuously last night without trying to change positions a lot.  I ate applesauce for breakfast, lunch and dinner and it sat well.  I'm still having a problem being able to identify the satisfied or full feeling.  We went to Target to start planning for Christmas and so I could walk without feeling like I was "walking".

11/15/04 - I woke up on Monday with no pain or discomfort at all.  I was able to move around well and felt like my old self. 

11/17/04 - This clear and full liquid phase is no joke.  I wanted... no, I needed... some variety, so I had a scrambled egg for breakfast.  I ate almost the whole thing.  I keep reading where people can only eat a couple of spoonfuls and they're full, but I don't feel like that.  I ate three spoonfuls and waited like a minute to see how I felt... nothing.  So I ate like three more spoonfuls and then I just stopped but I still didn't feel full.

11/20/04 - I went to my first Support Group meeting as a Post-op.  The meeting was awesome and I met three people who had there surgery around the same time that I had mine and it was great to be able to talk about what we were going through and how each of us addressed each issue.  I also weighed in... drum roll please... at 262.  WOOOOOO!!  My pre-op weight just before surgery was 279 (even though I always count from beginning weight of 285).  That put me at a 17 pound loss in TEN days.  Wow.  That was just the boost that I needed, too.  I go in for my two week follow-up on Tuesday, so I'll get my official weight then.  For the first time, I'm actually excited about weighing in! 

12/15/04

Wow.  I can not believe it's been this long since I've posted.  Well, I'm back and I'll do better about updating my profile.  Everything has been going well recovery-wise.  I feel great and I'm trying my best to follow ALL of the doctor's orders.  It's a daily struggle for me to get in a sufficient amount of water because it doesn't sit well on my pouch.  Cold, room temperature or hot - it doesn't matter... they all make me feel nauseous.  I'm not too fond of Crystal Lite, so I try to drink plenty of herbal tea.  I know it's not the same as plain water, but I am trying.   I am, however, getting better with my protein intake.  I never found a pre-made shake that I could stomach, so I made my own:  1/2 cup of coffee, 1/2 nonfat chocolate yogurt and 1 1/2 scoops of French Vanilla Designer Whey Protein (27g) (GNC).  It is delicious.. and I actually got the recipe from a suggestion card in the supplement can.  :)  One of the trainers at my gym turned me on to another protein mix that they sell.  It's made by a company called Lean Body for Her (30g) and the flavor is Vanilla Ice Cream.  I mix it with 1/2 cup of water and 1/2 cup of milk in the blender and I'm good to go.  This one is actually better than the first one.  As far as food, I've introduced my pouch to salads and they've gotten along beautifully.  :) 

I'm at a stage where I feel "normal" food-wise.  I can go to lunch with my co-workers and order from the menu.  Of course, I can't eat it all, but so what?  I can get lunch, dinner and lunch again from one meal.  How cool (and cost effective) is that?  I do have to put forth some extra effort to be good and do the right thing because I've discovered that I don't dump.  Don't ask 'How do you know that you don't dump?' - trust me, I know.  Let me just suffice it to say that I was the kid that stuck her hand on a hot stove eye after her mommy told her not to because it was hot... just to see if it really was.

12/16/04

I had my first big WLS moment yesterday and I wanted to share.

Since my surgery, I've worn nothing but sweats and long-sleeved t-shirts, but this week was my first week back to work, so I pulled out my "work" clothes.  I put on my favorite pair of pants - black with white pinstripes and cut to sit low on the waist - size 22.  The pants looked like they had gotten longer and the waist seemed stretched out.  I just figured my daughter had been playing dress-up in my clothes again and kept getting dressed.  I was sitting on the bed putting on my shoes when my fiancé decided he wanted to play.  He's tickling me and trying to pull me off of the bed at the same.  So he grabs me by the cuffs of my pants and pulls... and what happened?  The pants slide clear off and he reeled back into the wall!  Now these are the same pants that last month I had to take a deep breath to button - see the pic in my "Pre-op Photos" cluster above.  :)  How great do I feel now!?!?

12/22/04

Today I am exactly six weeks out from surgery.  I weighed in this morning at 248 (BMI 38.8) - my beginning weight was 285 (BMI 44.6).  I've lost 37 pounds and I feel absolutely FABULOUS!  Due to the holidays, I won't go in for my 6-week follow up until January 4th, which will make it my 8-week follow.  I'm really excited because even though I've had some challenges - like getting in all of my protein and water every day - I've done very well and I'm proud of myself.  I'm on my Gazelle every day and I love the way that I feel.

Changes I've noticed so far:

*Clothes*-  I've never been the type to dress up a lot, even my office attire is business casual.  My family and close friends labeled me "skater girl" because my everyday clothes are long-sleeved tee's and baggy jeans.  Well, yesterday I put on my fav pair of jeans and they would NOT stay up.  Even though they were baggy, I had enough hips and rear to hold them up.  Not any more.  After digging through my pile of I-can't-wear-these-but-I'm-going-to-keep-them-just-in-case clothes, I found a pair of jeans that I used to wear religiously a couple of years ago... and they fit!   My "real clothes" (slacks, dresses) size was 22, but I haven't tried on any of those things to determine my current size yet.

Pre-op baggy jeans - 46

Current baggy jeans - 42

Pre-op big tee's- XXXL

Current big tee's- XL

*Hair*-  From everything I've read, most people have a bout with losing hair after WLS.  I'm having a growth spurt.  My hair has grown approximately an inch and a half since surgery.  I don't know if this the calm before the storm and it's all going to fall out, but I hope not.  I started using Biotin shampoo about a month or so before surgery, so maybe that helped with growth.

*Skin*-  I'm getting lighter.  My face, neck, arms and shoulders look a couple of shades lighter than they used to be.  Someone told me it was because the skin in those places tightens easier and the end effect is looking lighter.  I think I'll ask my surgeon when I go in for my follow-up.

Overall, I'm doing great.  I look good and, more importantly, I FEEL good.  I took some pictures this week and I'm going to try to get them up before the new year.

Have a very Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!