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Okay well two bits of news for this week - first off I got a raise/paygrade promotion at work.  Like...congrats you get a 24% increase in your salary.  Heck yeah.  That's huge.  I really can't complain, I've gotten a raise of some sort every 6 months since I've been at Dell.  Toasted toads truth.  I know that isn't the case for everyone so I'm just happy that I've done so well.  I started at Dell 4.5 years ago at....are you ready for this?  $9.75 an hour.  That's not exactly 'lets build my career here' money. 

But - Dell told me during training that this was a 'meritocracy'.  Time here doesn't matter as much as how well you do.  So yeah, it's not like I'm making fantastically great money now or anything, but I'm over 20 an hour which was my goal for the year.  Works for me. 

Second news is I get to go to the RHCE training class.  This is a BIG DEAL guys.  i say this because there were over 20 people who wanted to get in, and only 10 of us were selected to go.  It's an 800 dollar course just to go and plus we get paid to attend.  So I'm going to get a two week course in linux and pray to god that I can learn what I need to learn in time to pass that test.  For as much as dell is investing for me to go, I really want to do my best.  I have three weeks before the classes start. 
Let the games begin!!!

Okay the last thing Im waiting to hear bout is the house and we've been told we have a 'very strong bid', ours is the highest, but someone is almost as much as us and bid cash.  Drat. But we'll find out very shortly what happens.  We're hoping and praying and crossing our toes.

Okay so onto the bridal stuff.  I'm going to go ahead and post a link to me in my wedding dress.  I'm not putting it up here because I don't want Jeff to stumble across it accidently.  That's not fair to him, he really doesn't want to see it before hand. 

http://i77.photobucket.com/albums/j63/lynnfriel/fantasy%20wedding/dress1.jpg

So there we go, it's alfred angel and I love it.  Most expensive dress I've ever had so I better love it eh?? :)  I'm getting my engagement pics done in 3-4 weeks as well, oct 10th so I'll put those pictures up as soon as we get them. 

Today we will be looking at DJs, Wedding Cakes and invitations :)  There is a 5 hour bridal event....you can win 50k too!  If I win the 50k, Im assuming that's about 30k after taxes, I'll finish putting deposits on everything and I'll have my plastic surgery done.  Then I really would look hot for my wedding eh? *laugh*  

I'm also trying to let my hair grow out some....so I can have an 'updo' of sorts for my wedding.  it's been 4 months since I've had it cut and it's almost touching my shoulders now.  I have an appointment for a trim on oct 1st.  We'll see what we can do with it, style wise and talk about it.  Hopefully something can be done :)  I don't want to pay for extensions. 

Well that's about all that's going on here for now.  Except that Im SO lucky I found Jeff, it's wonderful being in love with someone that's such a sweetie :)

So um 5 months later eh?

I haven't lost any more since my 1 year update.  I guess I spent the last 5 months being in love and just living day to day.  I've gotten out of a lot of habits.

Well summer is over, school starts back for my son this week and I don't have to drop him off and pick him up anymore, the bus will.  This means it'll be much easier for me to go jogging in the mornings or after work again.  I'm going to do my best to get back into a routine this week and take it from there.

Because you know what?  I wanna be hot for my wedding!

That's right so I'm now engaged to my honey.  Jeff and I are going to get married next summer, June 19th.  So I have 10 months to tone it up and everything.

I'm still wearing size 14s.  I'm 'okay' with that but my goal was size 12 and my goal was to be under 187.  I'm really close to both so I don't feel like giving up yet.  So I guess we just took a break.  I'm maintaining just fine but just not losing.  So time to start losing again. 

My engagement pics are scheduled for Oct 10th.  I may have to reschedule them but they will be done in Oct either way.  I'll post them when I get them.

In other news, Jeff and I are buying a house....we put an offer on a house this last week, we'll know in 3-5 weeks if the offer is accepted and we'll go frm there.   If we get this house I'll post pics of that too!

I knew this was going to be a longer post! I should have posted it thursday or friday but I've had a whirlwind few days!



SO there is a pic of me This last Friday.  I had the most amazing day friday.  

Slept in a bit, woke up next to my honey.  Got up and made breakfast.  Had yogart with chopped fresh strawberries in it.  Yummy!  It was pouring down rain outside so we opened the blinds and the window and just watched the rain while eating breakfast.  We made some french vanilla coffee and sipped on that while eating breakfast and watching the rain.  

After breakfast we went back to bed for awhile and made love...he teased me for a good 15 minutes before finally letting me have it *laugh* I love the way he plays with me.  Then we took a shower together, soaped each other up...I shaved his face for him and scrubbed his back.  He washed my hair for me and scrubbed my back.  I bent over to shave my leg and he started playing with me from behind and we ended up having sex in the shower as well.  

After we got out and I got ready we drove downtown.  I stopped and burlington coat factory and got the coat in the picture above.  Very nice coat :) I like it!  Then we went to whole foods market on 6th street.  We walked around and looked at everything.  We sampled some wine and a few other things.  I got some sugar free choc chip cookies.  We had lunch at the Italian food bar.  I got pasta (yeah a bit bad but wanted the pesto sauce).  We also got three chocolate truffles to share.  So good!

We went down to 6th street...visited a bar and got pics taken in a photo booth...saw a movie at alamo draft house...had 'dinner' at a cool place next to paramount, a 4 star resturant I guess.  Then watched the comedian...then went to buffalo bills with his friends...then went dancing and then did karaoke.

So I didn't get to see Jeff all weekend.  I went out to dinner with him and his kiddos on Friday.  His son is 8 and his daughter is 6.  They're pretty cute.  He went on a boyscout trip with them to the coast.  Missed him so bad *laugh*

I wanted to take a nap on sunday just to make the day go faster!

I did manage to get all my spring cleaning done though.  Everything mopped, vacuumed, dusted, washed and such. 

For dinner I made chili cheese puff with roasted tomato salsa, some quisadillas (low carb tortillas) and a spinach salad.

Yummy!

So he's having some issues with his ex wife and kids...  I don't really understand the full details and neither does he.  He spent all weekend with his kids, taking them to the boat and everything.  They left saturday morning and came back sunday afternoon.  His ex called him and said his Son had a major meltdown and said that daddy has a new girlfriend so he doesn't love us anymore. 

Jeff had a hard time with this of course.  So...tried to just 'be there for him'.  Which is something I guess he's never experienced before....he's used to being the macho guy and taking care of everything. 

Well after dinner I took him into my bedroom and shut the door. I had candles lit on the bedstands.  I took him into the bathroom with one of the candles and drew a bath in my garden tub...pulled him in with me and wrapped my legs around him and just held him for a bit.  I washed his hair and scrubbed him all over my my loofah sponge and he just let me touch and kiss and hold him.  He turned around to face me and we just had our legs wrapped around each other holding each other.  He kissed me and said that he thinks he's falling in love with me. 

He probably  just really liked the bath tub :p~

I really shouldn't discount what he said of course...but that's just my defense mechanism kicking in....telling myself that it's not possible for someone so sweet, sexy, adorable, fun, athletic, smart to love ME.  He's such a catch, really.  *laugh* I don't think he knows what a good guy he is.

Anyways, I made him toast and coffee for breakfast this morning.  I frown and think he needs to eat more but hey, it's something.  I think I'm going to make him toast with an egg and a slice of fruit tomorrow :p~

He can complain later.  I'll pipe it to /dev/null :)

190

I don't know if I'm going to make my 200 lbs lost goal or not.  It's really...I would LIKE to jsut to say I did it but that being said if I don't i"ll be okay with myself.

BTW....Jeff rocks my world :)

SO we've spent every day together since we met.  We did have a date for wednesday yes.... but tuesday after work he came to my desk and we talked and then we talked by my car and then we decided we should go get something to eat....

*laugh*  Oh...our first kiss rocked.

I'm such a bad girl :) 

He's really pretty... 'bad' too, but just a bit shy.  We so totally click it's amazing.

So we went for a walk at lunch on the trail at Dell, we were holding hands and then he had his arms around me, was just really nice.  What was also cool is that he didn't care WHO saw.  He was like you know, I'm into you I don't mind if people know it.

So we walked for about 30 minutes then we walked past where the trail has these high bushes and trees, so I pulled him over behind the trees...

He thought I was showing him where I lived or something.  I just turned and kissed him...and WOW, we both were just like JELLO, we both really wanted to kiss each other at that point :)

I just about fell over, he's just SUCH an amazing kisser.  He smells so good, tastes good, so sexy...  And so smart and sweet and techy...  And athletic...he's a certified life guard!!! 

Wow.

How did I ever get so lucky?  I just feel like I won the lottery.  I was pretty happy before...and being with him I just can't stop smiling! :)

190

Okay so 3 more lbs...  it's POSSIBLE.  In 9 days.  I've just really got to be careful. 

Last night I wasn't so careful.  I was up too late.  Your body  has to sleep to process fat, I KNOW that....just went out with a totally awesome guy and we talked (yes just talked) most of the night.

Very strange how it all happened, but he hikes and fishes and camps and bikes and swims and jogs and....

works downstairs and is as techy as I am????

Wow.

That's hawt. 

and he's certified in vmware and other random things....

And he's really cute.

Crazy. 

So was up until 4am talking with him last night...and we have another date Wednesday. 

Also...well last night just on a whim I told him I had vacation days for the 3rd/4th of april (for my surgeversary) and I asked him if he'd spend the days with me...so we're going to do SOMETHING... we'll see.

We're dancing around the physical stuff.  He did tell me I was the thinnest girl he's dated...huh?  me thin? *laugh*

He also said my pictures don't do me justice.  *laugh* what a sweet thing to say.

Only one date so don't want to go too fast but...think we might have something here.

191.5

Okay made it to pilates yesterday.  I did a bit of cardio before class on the elliptical but not enough to really count.  I should have had time to jog before the class but forgot my shoes and then sat down and started talking to F.

Well F is seeing someone else now *rolls her eyes* that doesn't mean anything really cuz he dates a girl a few times and then freaks out.  I know how he operates.  That's why he's never dated anyone over a month.

Im trying to figure out why I'm so attracted to him...physically I guess.  I'm not 'in love with him' and emotion wise I really just enjoy his company.  I WOULD date him though.  Why?  Well because the sex with him is fantastic.  We just click like that, and I think he could use the help trying to learn how to have a real relationship.  But I can't see it being a 'forever' thing with him, I don't FEEL that for him.  Never did...  Even at the beginning.  He was just the first person who ever saw me, thought i was cute and asked me out...just 'in person'.  Still the only person like that.  Everyone else I've met online.

I can't 100% discount that though, because I've met people online that I've gotten together with for lunch or whatever and they were attracted to me once they met me.  It's still a work in progress for me in terms of how I relate to guys I 'date'. 

So lets see, I haven't really kept any of you 'up to date' on my boycraziness lately eh? *laugh*

Okay, guy from work 'K' asked me out to lunch.  I thought we were just meeting as friends, but when I got back he messaged me and told me had trouble not staring at me and asked me out Friday night.  We went out for coffee to the most coolest coffee place ever (yeah grammar didnt work there but got the point across).  I really like that place.  So he is a gamer guy...we came back and messed around some.  I don't know what gets into guys but he really wanted to go down on me... *cough* so um, yeah I let him *laugh* 

It's funny...but since this is my diary and all I'm going to put this here.... I'll NEVER forget the first time that F went down on me.  I'd never really had anyone do that before.  None of my previous boyfriends had been into doing it all.  I had done it with Michael (my sons father) but he'd only done it just a bit, enough to say we did it (we did 69 for the purity point) for just like a second.  Okay so....I told B that I wanted that, he said well you should have told me.  Well....so I thought I guess it can't hurt to ask.  So next time I was with F I just asked him...baby will you go down on me?  He gave me this look...and it was just so damned sexy...like looking into my eyes and then he smiled at me with his sexy ass lips (yeah his face is just hot to me) and said yeah...then spent the next 30 minutes rocking my world with his tongue.  OMG was it nice.  I just really want to remember that night always.  I'm sure it would be even more special if it was with someone I cared about and loved, but really being friends with him I felt close to him and we'd been having sex every day for 2 weeks at that point so...felt comfortable with him.  Was great.

Anyways, with K he went down on me but wasn't like 'that', was okay though. 

Okay so lets see, two other guys I've had 'first dates' with this past week.  One I went out to lunch with on tuesday, his name is Freddie (not to be confused with the prevous F which was fernando).  He's messaged me a few times but haven't heard back from him much.  We'll see.  He's pretty cute. 

Then went out to dinner wednesday night with a "j" :)  that was amazingly fun.  He gave me a very nice kiss goodnight at my door :) 

Anyways... I think I'd really like to date J and see what happens between him...  K *shrug* not that into him and he's seeing other people anyways and I don't need that drama (ie, he has someone he considers a girlfriend but they have an OPEN relationship.  Not my cup of tea).  The new F...he's cool too.  I'll see if either of them call me back eh?

I seem to be off my carb cycle finally.  I've been eating what I should the last week or so, maybe that's why I've lost some weight finally eh?

Next goal: 187 so I can be at 200 lbs lost.  After then goal is 174.  Final goal is 160.  I may not be able to get to that without plastics but we'll see.

192.5

Yeah still at same weight but that means it wasnt a fluke right :)

Okay so had a normal first date last night...went out to dinner, split the check...talked for awhile, he gave me a hug and then a soft closed lipped kiss... 

I smiled at him then gave him a real kiss...cuz Im just like that I guess.

Anyways, actually really liked him.

Very cool.  We'll see if he calls again eh.

In other news I woke up at 3:30 am with leg cramps cuz I need to stretch.  Haven't jogged in a week cuz I was sick.

I feel so lonely :(

Sometimes I just wish there was someone who really cared about me...

dumb, I know.

I guess I thought if I lost weight I'd be more...worthy of having someone care about me. 

Dunno what's wrong with me :(

192.5

Broke my stall :)  Finally.  Better late then never. 

Got a new heart rate monitor last night!