amanda6378

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well...i went over to europe for a little more then two weeks....i went to london rome and paris...i think im stil to fat for all the walking that i did but i guess everyone was in the same boat i was exhausted lots of walking i could have never done this at 400lbs it was great makes me want to do more makes me want to never stop...i missed out on a lot being big...im still fat but im not circus fat im normal society fat and im okay with that....i am almost a year out..a year that flew by that i dont remember...a year of crazy changes and to think a year ago i thought i would know who i was i thought i was going to have myself figured out...i literaly am starting all over again..i have no idea who i am no idea who i will in a year..my life no longer directly revolves around my weight loss...it needs to start because im not done there is a lot moer weight i wanna lose...but i have to be realistic i know as well...ever since 6months out my weight was really slow losing but it did every once and while and im about 175lbs down all together since i started losing weight pre op and now post op.....i wanna share some pictures from my trip so enjoy :)


http://photos-f.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs115.snc3/16269_221382805660_545150660_4588705_1653823_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs115.snc3/16269_221373685660_545150660_4588391_5158311_n.jpg

http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs095.snc3/16269_221408715660_545150660_4589255_4173853_n.jpg

http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs095.snc3/16269_221408715660_545150660_4589255_4173853_n.jpg

http://photos-e.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs049.snc3/13644_510246088642_305100805_360145_3082004_n.jpg
(dont worry i didnt eat it all)

http://photos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs049.snc3/13644_510245669482_305100805_360069_1304998_n.jpg
(trucking along)

http://photos-d.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs076.snc3/14342_201079271868_514976868_4026251_1077601_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs056.snc3/14342_201079161868_514976868_4026235_4040277_n.jpg

http://photos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs056.snc3/14342_201079156868_514976868_4026234_1825596_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs076.snc3/14342_201079016868_514976868_4026218_3948191_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs076.snc3/14342_201063391868_514976868_4025983_2224734_n.jpg

http://photos-d.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs076.snc3/14342_201063381868_514976868_4025982_1014979_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs076.snc3/14342_201063321868_514976868_4025976_6631279_n.jpg

http://photos-d.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs076.snc3/14342_200963776868_514976868_4025168_4505856_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs076.snc3/14342_200956071868_514976868_4025030_1759796_n.jpg

http://photos-h.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs076.snc3/14342_200955821868_514976868_4024992_7268296_n.jpg

http://hphotos-snc3.fbcdn.net/hs076.snc3/14342_200963781868_514976868_4025169_3298590_n.jpg

blog update coming soon....webcam fixed yayyy

quick update i just realized to myself that i have lost 140lbs from my highest known weight...thats a lot...literally that is my best friend shes 140lbs i lost her...thats crazy it kinda brought a year to my eye...ive lost 90lbs since surgery i get selfish and feel like i should be losing more but i am fucking happy and i dont care i have a crazy insane supportive boyfriend and i have made myself happy and now i can work on making someone happy along with letting them make me happy

 

I had a great time in Vegas it was an amazing trip...I put some new pictures up from it. Eating on vacation is really hard especially when your friends want to eat for cheap and a lot for cheap so buffets where there..I got though it it was hard. Now I will move on...before vacation I made a youtube video..and I will probably do another one soon too :). This is just a short litle update :)

I want to get to 169...I realized today I am half way through losing the total amount weight weight I need to lose to get there. Kinda cool.

This is my pilot episode :) and I realize the fan from my computer in the background so I need to turn that off the next time I do one of these.

well well well it is two months post op already, I really feel as if it has flown...I have wanted to start a vlogg thing but I haven't yet I keep saying I am gonna but I am busy and in the time I am not doing anything I don’t want to fill it with awkward talking to myself time.

I haven't been on a scale in like two? weeks I think, but last time at the doctors I was def under 300 and I had lost 100lbs since my first weight in for my first appointment at my doctors moment...so that was pretty exciting...and I told myself before I wasn’t going to care about the scale and I am not I know it is inevitable that I am going to lose weight...and I know I am losing inches...but I do have an appointment next Tuesday at my center so I will know what the weight is then...

I put pictures up from 2 months that I took earlier today I see these pictures and people say they are accurate but I dont see that person but I guess that this is the roller-coaster we all signed up for and I am fine with that...

Two of my very close friends I live with are both very nice girls that have similarities about each other which is where both of them just believe the good in people to much..they both had things happened the past weekend that made me really mad and I thought about it a lot on why they don’t stick up for themselves or realize when people are giving them shit...and I just sat there thinking about what made me different...I have no problem sticking up for myself...I never have...I have no problem sticking up for my friends...I think I am pretty quick witted...I am defensive...I think being defensive is not necessarily the best thing ever...because I think it spawned from the fact that I have been fat my whole life...I have been picked on so much had so many stares so many people say things...have had so much shit happen...that has made me who I am today...a strong person who isn’t afraid to stick up for myself...and even at nearly 400lbs if I could help someone not disrespecting me I would...and it will still be that way from now on no matter what...and I will continue to to stick up for my friends because even though to me being fat sucked and I missed out on a lot now in my life, even though I really never thought I did but I have...it has made me the strong adult I am today and its something no one can take away from me and its one of those moments where you cant forget where you come from in this whole journey....