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Well, I just passed my 10 months out from surgery a couple of weeks ago, and realized I didn't post on here--shame on me! 😄 

I've been busy settling into my new job, and now that I've passed my 90-day probation period, I'm an official employee! Woo hoo! With the new job, I've had to cut back considerably on my exercise regimen, which is a bummer. I really enjoy working out now, so I don't want to slip into bad habits again. I think I'm going to try to go to the Y in the mornings before work. Hopefully, that will be the best of both worlds for me--exercising and not stressing about getting it in. 😉 I do like my Spinning class on Saturday mornings, so I'll continue with that. Who knew it would be this challenging to get everything figured out? LOL

As for the two opportunities I posted about before, I think I'm going to put them on hold at the moment. I really need to figure out my exercising situation first, then can decide how to add those in and still sleep. 

Hope everyone reading this is well!

I'm in the process of going back to work--woo hoo! A friend let me know about an opening at his company, so now we're scheduling an interview. I'm a bit nervous since I haven't worked in over 3 years, but I'm confident I will get the job. I have so much experience, it's just crazy! So, of course, this means I need to find some new clothes to interview in. I can't wait! 

 

And...I have a couple of other opportunities popping up in the next few months. One is possibly becoming a Beachbody Coach! I'm really excited about making that happen because it would force exercise to be a part of my life AND make some money along the way. Plus, I can change up some of my exercise routines and start working toward my certification checklist. I have a mental list of different exercise certifications that I want to get, so any extra $$$ would be beneficial. Another opportunity popping up is selling Lia Sophia jewelry. I think that one would be a lot of fun, and like a creative outlet. Plus, it would give me a chance to get out in front of people again--something that went by the wayside as I continued to gain weight. I'm naturally an introvert, but I'm constantly drawn to extroverted things, like performing in front of people, like drama club in high school, playing in the marching band, or participating in Rainbow Girls--also during high school. It's like I enjoy the uncomfortableness of being in that type of situation--like an adrenaline rush. LOL Anyway, I think it would be good for me. 

 

Among these three things, I kind of want to do them all. However, I need to pace myself, too. It's a bad habit of mine to take on too much, and then burn out quickly. So...slow and steady wins the race, right? Here's to new adventures! 

Haha! I don't think I ever would have considered myself a Crazy Gym Lady last year when I started the process, but that's one of the bright sides of my surgery. My friends affectionately call me "The Machine" because I am always working out! 

Recently, I did a two week stint with Hot Yoga, and I fell in love! It was so great to sweat so profusely, AND be so aware of your surroundings. Honestly, there was NO WAY I could have done it without surgery--even if I lost a few pounds. It wasn't so much about the flexibility, but more about the stamina--which, I had none before. Now, I happily do my 45 minutes on the elliptical like I'm a BOSS. I've also incorporated TRX and Spinning into my regimen. Soon, I hope to add in some outdoors stuff as the weather gets nicer. It's a little hard to get motivated to run when there are icy patches, 6-foot+ tall snow banks and hills.

But, getting back to my post title, yes, I'm 6 months out as of yesterday, and it has been a great adventure! I also recently hit 100 lbs. lost, which is huge. I really set that as a mini-goal for myself in the back of my head. I just wanted to take full advantage of those first 6 months, and get as much weight off as possible. And, I can proudly say it's done! I'm not saying it's all rainbows and unicorns, as life does still happen with or without surgery. However, I feel I have a better perspective and able to realize what I want to get out of my surgery experience. Even when stressful things came up (like my husband being laid off), I didn't bury myself in bags of Raisinets or sleeves of Oreos or whatever would "soothe" my stress. I just pushed harder at the gym, which never really occurred to my old ways. It's not that I thought exercise was bad, it's just that it wasn't "my thing". I never felt 100% comfortable with the idea of working out--that's just silly when I could go head-first into a cake! Sweat? Ugh...gross! Now that I'm working out 5-6 days a week, I feel weird when I miss out on my workouts. Who knew? More importantly, who the heck is this NEW girl? LOL

I'm coming to terms with the changes in my life, and for a change, I'm really excited about them. I no longer have to worry about my weight getting in the way of what I want out of life. I used to put things on hold because I was deathly afraid of "Fear of Failure" and "Fear of Success". I know it may seem weird to be afraid of both at the same time, but it had hindered me considerably. Now, I just want to keep trying new things to get past these artificial fears, and build new memories in their places. It will happen, even if it takes longer than I may want it to. 

 Wow! It has been a whirlwind couple of months! I feel like so much has happened in such a short amount of time--and it has! I think when I first started looking into surgery, I never imagined what life would truly be like post-op. Now that I'm here, it's a work in progress. No matter how much I read about other people's experiences, it just doesn't compare to first-hand experience. Some things that I've learned over the past couple of months are:

1.) You're losing weight at a fast pace, and your mind needs time to catch up to what it sees. I still see the 299lb. version of me, even though you can clearly see weight loss in my face and some of the clothes I wear. I know it will get better over time, and I need to be patient. I didn't gain my weight overnight, and I can't expect it to fall off just as fast. 

2.) Mourning food is a natural part of the process. I definitely wasn't prepared for this one! I thought I had everything under control, but around a month out, it hit me--hard. It wasn't so much that I was hungry and needed to eat, but the idea that I wouldn't be able to enjoy my food as I once did, really smacked me around. Then, I started realizing that I was putting too much emphasis on the act of eating, and not why I was eating. For me, food became a crutch during some very difficult and traumatic times in my life at an early age, so it was my normal to eat large quantities of food without blinking an eye. Now that I'm on the other side of surgery, though, it just doesn't hold the same meaning as before. I physically cannot stuff my face if I'm having a rough day--I have to deal with it, head on, which can be scary and uncomfortable. However, I'm learning to work through my feelings in a different light.