Disbelief of the future

Sep 29, 2011

Its really hitting me that I will be having surgery in a month! *wow* We just came home from Idaho and a birthday weekend with friends and family. While there I was able to talk to a couple really good friends about my wls and felt very comfortable doing so. The sad thing about the weekend is that a couple of my SUPER close friends, the ones that I wouldn't of thought twice about not seeing them didn't show up to any of our plans. Not gonna lie I was a little crushed. These are the girls that I was having a tough time telling about my news in the first place and now I won't see them until I will be 6 months post-op! This is what leads me into the disbelief. I am looking at friends blogs and pictures and their time frames for weight lost and clothing sizes. I can't believe that That can be me! I know that my family will notice a difference in my appearance around Christmas (2 months out), but not seeing anybody at home until 6 months is going to be crazy. Are they going to notice me? It just blows my mind!!! While we were gone we learned that the month we gained with DH's deployment being bumped, we are losing the time together because they are sending him to a school for the entire month. He isn't going to be here for my surgery=( I knew he was going to try to go to a training and miss the morning of my surgery, but he was going to be in town and would be there when I woke up. Now...he isn't going to be in the same state as me!. I'm hoping that he will be able to leave and meet me at the hospital the night of my surgery, but there is no reason to get my hopes up with the army. Thank God for my mom coming to help me out with DS!! Okay, now I am rambling! Just know that I am SUPER excited!!!!

Random note: I am able to talk about my current weight easier now. I think that I am accepting that I will not be 300lbs forever!!! It was nice hearing from my "little" brother that he only put me at 240 max...in my dreams AND near future=)

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