Trying to maintain weight

Mar 04, 2009

  It's been quite a while since I've written anything. Many reasons, but mostly because my life got busy, and then my cold computer decided it didn't want to work. So, after going through withdrawal, and getting slightly organized in my creative side, and healing from a very dangerous illness, NOT RELATED TO MY GASTRIC BYPASS SURGERY, I'm able to get back to some kind of normalcy, if that's possible.

It started last year. We have horrific blizzards, snow, rain, and I basically became snow/ bound. Why? I'm also physically disabled, and it is nearly impossible for me to walk on anything that isn't dry using my cane, (which I have to have to walk). Then we had the fires. We live in the area of Northern California devastated by fires. We were very lucky in where we live. We were not given any evacuation orders. By way of the crow, we were only 5 miles from the fires. But, because of the canyons, we were further away, and were not in immediate danger. HOWEVER, we were stuck. For a while, if anyone left this area, they were not allowed back in. And we couldn't take a chance, mostly because of our kitty (23), and doggy (13). So, again house bound; and for a longer period of time. And it being June, i couldn't  get outside to do my puttering in my little garden. WELL, situational depression set in. And experiencing it, I didn't recognize the signs. Neither did my husband, who, is a disabled Viet Nam Vet, with PTSD, and is controlled by anti psychotic meds. Then I got food poisoning, and a stomach flu. What is this leading to?
I DAMN NEAR DIED. I LOST WEIGHT AND WHEN TAKEN TO THE HOSPITAL, I WEIGHED 109#.
I also have Meniere's Syndrome. It causes vertigo and headaches, nausea and vomiting. The combination of all of these created a chemical psychosis. I litter ally went insane. I was passing out, not eating, paranoid, (my family has copies of emails I sent. Boy was I crazy). I locked myself in our bedroom, and my husband told me of some of the things I did.  My family resorted to calling the Sheriff's office to do a welfare check. How I managed to convince them I was "normal" I'll never know. I do not remember anything. Which, from what I've been told, I'm glad I didn't.
Anyway. My husband heard me moaning, broke into the room, called my doctor, and was trying to get me dressed. He said I was passed out, and wasn't breathing well. He called 911, (which is another story), and when they got here I was dead; not for a long period, just a couple of minutes, but none the less dead. The EMT gave me NARCAN (a narcotic antagonist), and said I was suffering from an overdose of my pain pills. I wasn't, and blood tests showed this. I finally woke (if that's what it was), I still only remember part of this. Anyway, when they weighed me, I was 109#. My target weight was 160#, and I was 155# when all these things started. My potassium was 2.0, and usually that's death. GOD must have decided he didn't want me yet, and I came back. I was in the hospital for a week. Another story; I'm an RN, and let me tell you, a crazy, psychotic RN is not a nice person. The nurses at Feather River Hospital are the best. I can only imagine some of the things I said. But, by the time I left I think I apologized to everyone, I hope.
Anyway, as I said this was a year ago when this started. I take my crazy lady pills now, I'm at 135, and only vary 5#'s up or down. ALL my lab work is finally within normal limits, and I do my best to maintain. My surgeon says that as long as I stay, (he would like me to gain 10# more, he is happy with where I am).
So, I do not regret the surgery. It was not the cause of my problems. My problems would have still been there, just maybe not as fast. And now, my husband and I are also closer, because we both are crazy, and need to look out for each other.
The final prognosis? I'm here until GOD decides he wants me/us.

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