gracielee
Hello everyone! I'm not a great story teller, but here it goes...My weight fluctuated throughout my youth, and looking back now I'm realizing how relative size is. My average size until I turned 25 was between a 7 and 9 and the largest I had gotten was between an 11 and 13. I'd like to add that I would give anything now to be a size 13. After turning 25 I started packing on the pounds a little here a little there and I woke up sometime at 27 to find that I was more than 230 pounds. I had already felt the difference in the way I was treated by the world once I had hit a size 15 but I didn’t realize how heavy I had gotten. I joined OH in 2004 understanding that my BMI was too low but still hoping to learn and gain more resources to address my weight issue. I found a surgeon who would ok the surgery but after much though decided that before I turned to surgery I wanted to give it my all, to know that I had tried everything in my power first. Between 2004 to 2007 I have went from Meridia, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Medifast, and just plain old fashioned workouts. I found small successes to eventually lead to far greater weight regain, causing my depression to fall heavier upon me. I stuck to the work out and the basic principles of Weight Watchers and managed to lose and keep off 35 pounds (at times 45 lbs) but that was it. Some people out there don’t think 195 lbs. is a weight problem, much more people out there do…For me, it’s been painful. I wish I had never been thin to at least have the ignorance, to not know how differently the world responds and reacts to one’s weight. I hate that I get out of breath so quickly and can feel the weight resting (crush) on my lungs. I can go on and on with the things that I hate. What I hate the most is that I have pretty much everything I ever wanted and my weight has somehow become my depression haunting me endlessly. I should be the happiest now but I’m the opposite.
I am now pursuing a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy with Dr. Alvarez. I have poor (not horrible but not great or even good) credit. So I need to somehow get a loan or raise money for 10,000. I am hoping that at the end of my journey I can help others get through similar obstacles that I have faced.
