Anticipation & Frustration

May 25, 2009

So for some reason this week at my weigh in(thursdays) I didn't loose any weight, I actually gained 2 pounds...Ugh unbelievable because I went back and looked at my food diary and well, Im not over my calories set by my nutritionist and havn't cheated in anyway...I have been on the program for 9 weeks and have been doing really well sticking to the plan...I did have a few days that weren't to the tee but I always stayed under my caloric intake...Now I have to admit that this past week I have been so all over the place with appointments that I didn't get to the gym...which makes me feel even worset because I feel useless unless I get to the gym...and now that I have an actual surgery date well Im so anxious about gaining a single ounce before hand if anything I wanted to loose another 20 pounds...ecspecially since they won't let me excersise for about 4 weeks post-op...Yeah Im really over ananlyzing everything these days...this is something I have wanted for so long and now it's so close that Im super stressed...Im not sure if it's my thoughts of am I doing the right thing(I know I am) but also how others are going to react...I already have people reacting differently to me in just the 56 lbs I have lost...I know Im going to change but the real me...the person everyone says is so loving and caring will always be here...Im just getting a chance to really live my life but it just seems as though now alot of people can't believe Im actually doing this and going through with it...I dont know maybe it's me...

Is anyone out there been in the same place...super excited, worried, anxious and just plain frustrated!

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