Year After....

Jun 24, 2011

How do I feel? I am happy with my weight and everyone around me tells me i look my best ever. I still need and want to lose more pounds to reach my goal. From size 28 I am size 14/12. I would be more than happy to be size 10 or 8. So, i still need to keep going. I don't have much hair, but i handle it... it kind of helps because it's curly. I am thinking in the future to do a tummy tuck and surgery for my arms. I don't know why, but i've seen that other girls have not that problem and they were the same weight or more than me, and their arms look great. =( I still can't wear short sleeves shirts nor dresses because i dont like y saggy arms =( ewww! .. so that's something i am trying to "fix".

I am not feeling yet comfortable with bathing suit because my arms, and my legs... you can notice the weight i've lost by looking at them.. so i still cover myself up.
In my personal life, i am still single.. i dated a guy from 8 or 9 months and it was a disaster. He is "still" around and i hope soon it's for sure over. Disaster because since the beginning it was all a lie. He was married, still involved with the wife and seeing us and being with us both. Major drama. So i just spent more time crying than smiling. I guess that kind of got me out of focus with my weight and myself. I lost my job, and it has been difficult to find a new one. So financially, it's not good either.

I am sad, not totally depressed but just sad, hoping that soon my situations will change. I've seen many girls are happy with their weight loss,... i am... but, i thought i would be having more fun. What am I doing wrong? My marriage was really bad, i try to be a better person and woman for the next relationship, but this man just broke my heart completely. Sigh! Is it worth it to be nice,kind,faithful to men when they just abuse you,lie and cheat??.. i say, to be a total bitch makes you happier, and you don't get at all.  I feel so stupid. Sigh...

I am glad though, that many ladies are happy and have a better changed life after their surgery. I am still waiting for my happy transition... well, that's all for now...

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