jewels72nd
20 days to go!
Feb 18, 2009
Yup, just 20 days to go until surgery! I thought I'd be SUPER nervous at this point, but my excitement just keeps rising every single day! I have my pre-op today after work. I had my blood drawn right away this morning! (HOLY COW, did they EVER take a lot of blood - yucky!) I have my last appt. with my surgeon on Monday, the 23rd. It seems just yesterday I was a couple months out. I am trying to get as many different samples of protein supplements as possible to have on hand. I live 100+ miles from any suppliers. I have been mentally evaluating my friends and family. I haven't told anyone in my family but my only sister (I have 7 brothers) because they are all fortunate to not have many weight issues and just wouldn't understand. My mother is elderly and overweight, all her life. I think in a weird sense, she has security in me being overweight as well. I haven't told her anything yet. I'm sure she suspects something, but I don't have room in my head for the negativity. In pschy. we had a whole session about reactions, etc. Months and months ago I pinpointed who I suspected would be a negative draw on my process. I have tried to avoid this topic with them. It's MY issue, and it's not about them! My husband and kids have been wonderful! My youngest son seems to have this vision that I will be skinny when he comes up to visit me! It's hard to explain to him how this works! They keep reassuring me how they love me just the way I am. That's getting old to hear even tho I know intentions are good! I do NOT love myself as I am. I can't wait to be proud of myself again and get my self confidence back. I can't wait to FEEL GOOD and full of energy again! I can't wait to skip and run up the stairs! I can't wait to not worry constantly about what my fat *ss looks like when I am doing something!! My head is up and ready for this challenge! The challenge to live my life happily and healthy!!!
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About Me
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40.5
BMI
Jun 13, 2008
Member Since
