Worried and confused

Oct 30, 2014

I am 5 months post-op.  I had roux-en-y on May 28th.  I have had an awful recovery and am still having lots of complications.  I have been told that I am in the 5% of bariatric patients who do this.  I am currently on a feeding tube and have been on it for about 2 months so far with no end in sight as of right now.  I came back to work last week and have been struggling a lot with it.  I travel with my job, so we are in the vehicle 80% of the work day.  This morning I fell asleep (at least I think I did) in the van.  The last time I remember looking at the clock, it was 7:15 a.m. When I woke up it was 12:30 (very unlike me to sleep like that).  My assistant woke me up saying that she was talkin to me and I was responding with jibberish language that she couldn't make out.  She also said that my eyes kept rolling back in my head.  When I finally came to my senses (woke up), she told me this and said they were on the way to take me to hospital.  I disagreed and assured her that I was ok.  I have been feeling very disconnected for a few days and today is really really bad. Has anyone else ever had this happen to them? What is wrong with me?  I have dreams all the time that I am dying from this stuff.  I just don't understand.  Why won't I heal? Why can't I be normal again?  I have lost 116 pounds but would gladly take all that back of I could just feel good again.  This is supposed to be the best time of my life and it's the absolute worst.  Help!! Does anyone relate to me?  I'm so scared. 

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