Marie R.
Flip Flop with Food
Mar 12, 2009
I find that my relationship with food still isn't as it should be. I wonder if it will ever get completely sorted out. I'm beginning to think it won't - and that I'll have to watch and be careful all the rest of my life. Does that upset me? No, not really. Most people that live in a first world country have to watch what they eat if they choose to be healthy. Why should I be any different? There is nothing wrong with having to exercise some self-control - it's good for the soul I think. I'm sure some people would think I'm trying to talk myself into this or something ... But I'm finding myself a little stronger with this ability and that self control is assisting me in other areas.
Recently back home from my second total knee replacement knee surgery. It was a whole different process this time - same surgeon, same hospital - but different anesthetist and different unit doctor at short-term rehab in the hospital. What's that mean? Well, it means that everything was different. I was taken off the anti-inflammatory and the lyrica on Day 5 after the surgery this time. Which means I was left with tylenol and hydromorphone as my only pain meds. What this meant was that I stayed on a higher level of the hydromorphone (the maximum allowed) until just a day before I was released from rehab. Because of the nature of the hydromorphone (narcotic - morphine) they have huge limitations on what amount they send you home with. So, I've been trying really hard to get myself off the morphine. I walk up routinely at around 4 AM for two or three hours now, every morning. My body seems to be wanting another hit. I sit there and ask myself is the pain that bad, and intellectually, I know it isn't, so I don't allow myself to take the pain med. But man, I sure want it. This is where I find my food relationship control is really helping me out. I never thought how it would come in handy here. I take that knowledge of talking my way through the food desire but replace the food addiction with the narcotic "addiction". I'm putting that narcotic "addiction" in quotes as I'm sure it's not really bad - I'm not sweating or crazy with need. Anyhow - just really interesting how things are all connected - and I never thought it would happen that way.
I go through stages with food. The past few months (since my first total knee replacement in November 2008), I haven't been so vigilent about protein. I still take my supplements routinely ... but before I was very focused on trying to make sure I had at least 90+ grams of protein a day. If I went over 100 grams I'd be very pleased with myself. Water continues to be a struggle. I'm lucky if I get 42 oz in per day. I think I've only been able to get the 64 oz/day in maybe a total of 10 days since my surgery 14 months ago.
Some days I don't eat very much - I struggle to get in 1 cup of food. No real interest. Other days I easily get 1 1/2 cups in at a meal and I could graze longer. I usually tell myself to stop grazing - you're done - you're not hungry. I still don't really ever get hungry. I seem to have an internal need to eat - more from my head. Not grumbly tummy that feels empty. I have started feeling full a few times. All of a sudden, it's just like I know if I take one more mouthful I'll explode. I still take a long time to eat and put the plate/bowl or fork down periodically through the meal. I don't really have a problem with no drinking around meal times. I do confess I have forgotten a couple of times - and will take a swig of liquid 15 minutes or so after a meal. Nothing hurts or happens - but I get nervous when I catch myself do it.
I have about 4 more months until I go for a visit to Dr Graber's office for a face-time visit. It would be great if I was at his goal of 160 pounds. I have about 25 pounds left to get there. If I carry on with how things have been going over the past few months, I won't make the goal. BUT - if I can start getting more physical, I may be able to reach the goal. I'm just hoping my recovery from this second knee replacement surgery works out so that I can go to a gym and get some quality work-out time done soon. Maybe in about another month or month and a half my legs will be strong enough to have a go. That'd be so sweeeeeeet.
0 comments
Recently back home from my second total knee replacement knee surgery. It was a whole different process this time - same surgeon, same hospital - but different anesthetist and different unit doctor at short-term rehab in the hospital. What's that mean? Well, it means that everything was different. I was taken off the anti-inflammatory and the lyrica on Day 5 after the surgery this time. Which means I was left with tylenol and hydromorphone as my only pain meds. What this meant was that I stayed on a higher level of the hydromorphone (the maximum allowed) until just a day before I was released from rehab. Because of the nature of the hydromorphone (narcotic - morphine) they have huge limitations on what amount they send you home with. So, I've been trying really hard to get myself off the morphine. I walk up routinely at around 4 AM for two or three hours now, every morning. My body seems to be wanting another hit. I sit there and ask myself is the pain that bad, and intellectually, I know it isn't, so I don't allow myself to take the pain med. But man, I sure want it. This is where I find my food relationship control is really helping me out. I never thought how it would come in handy here. I take that knowledge of talking my way through the food desire but replace the food addiction with the narcotic "addiction". I'm putting that narcotic "addiction" in quotes as I'm sure it's not really bad - I'm not sweating or crazy with need. Anyhow - just really interesting how things are all connected - and I never thought it would happen that way.
I go through stages with food. The past few months (since my first total knee replacement in November 2008), I haven't been so vigilent about protein. I still take my supplements routinely ... but before I was very focused on trying to make sure I had at least 90+ grams of protein a day. If I went over 100 grams I'd be very pleased with myself. Water continues to be a struggle. I'm lucky if I get 42 oz in per day. I think I've only been able to get the 64 oz/day in maybe a total of 10 days since my surgery 14 months ago.
Some days I don't eat very much - I struggle to get in 1 cup of food. No real interest. Other days I easily get 1 1/2 cups in at a meal and I could graze longer. I usually tell myself to stop grazing - you're done - you're not hungry. I still don't really ever get hungry. I seem to have an internal need to eat - more from my head. Not grumbly tummy that feels empty. I have started feeling full a few times. All of a sudden, it's just like I know if I take one more mouthful I'll explode. I still take a long time to eat and put the plate/bowl or fork down periodically through the meal. I don't really have a problem with no drinking around meal times. I do confess I have forgotten a couple of times - and will take a swig of liquid 15 minutes or so after a meal. Nothing hurts or happens - but I get nervous when I catch myself do it.
I have about 4 more months until I go for a visit to Dr Graber's office for a face-time visit. It would be great if I was at his goal of 160 pounds. I have about 25 pounds left to get there. If I carry on with how things have been going over the past few months, I won't make the goal. BUT - if I can start getting more physical, I may be able to reach the goal. I'm just hoping my recovery from this second knee replacement surgery works out so that I can go to a gym and get some quality work-out time done soon. Maybe in about another month or month and a half my legs will be strong enough to have a go. That'd be so sweeeeeeet.
Twelve Months Later (11 pipers piping ...)
Jan 11, 2009
Today is my one year surgiversary.
Exactly 12 months ago, I was laying in my hospital bed, feeling drowzy, and trying to remember to sip my water. I felt fine.
Here are my results thus far:
January 1, 2003:
Weight = 425 pounds (BMI 70.7)
Consult Day in November 2007:
Weight = 316 pounds (BMI 52.6)
===> down 109 pounds and 76.25" from 2003
Surgery Day in January 2008:
Weight = 290.2 pounds (BMI 48.3)
===> down 134.8 pounds and 78.75" from 2003
===> down 25.8 pounds and 2.50" from consult day
6 Month Surgiversary July 2008:
Weight = 227.8 pounds (BMI 37.9)
===> down 197.2 pounds and 134.75" from 2003
===> down 88.2 pounds and 58.50" from consult day
===> down 62.4 pounds and 56.00" from surgery day
12 Month Surgiversary January 2009:
Weight = 195.2 pounds (BMI 32.5)
===> down 229.8 pounds and 168.00" from 2003
===> down 120.8 pounds and 91.75" from consult day
===> down 62.4 pounds and 89.25" from surgery day
===> down 32.6 pounds and 33.25" from 6 month surgiversay
The other day, someone posted a link on the RNY board about taking a home body fat test. It was easy to do with my book of self-measurements in hand. According to this test, I have 35.5% body fat - or 69 pounds of fat. Lovely. But still - a cool thing to know. I should be around 22% of body fat. Still a ways to go!
http://www.healthcentral.com/cholesterol/home-body-fat-test-2774-143.html?ic=4004
BODY IMAGE
It feels much better to be simply obese rather than super mobidly obese. Hard to think of those days - although my body image is still as if I was super mobidly obese. This past November, I had to be in hospital. I cringed each time they asked me to get up on stretchers, or beds, or into chairs or wheel chairs. They had to transport me from one hospital to another at one point, and they wanted me to get into a wheel chair. I told them that I wouldn't fit as it wasn't a bariatric chair. They told me to try it. I turned scarlet, shook my head, and had a go - all ready to be horrified when my big butt and hips would get stuck on the sides of the wheel chair. Of course all the people around me were mostly young men - my dreaded enemies all my life. I was just about ready to cry, knowing that I wouldn't fit, when I slipped right into the chair with no problem. I could NOT believe it. I kept looking around, waiting for the arm to fall off or something - sure that the thing was broken and I'd collapse on the ground. Well, it was fine. No problem at all. That was a real eye opener. I find myself at least trying chairs now. So far, none have collapsed or been too small. I get a little more confident each time. I wonder if we ever lose that fear? I sure hope so. Thinner people just don't realize all the extra baggage that fat folk carry around - beyond the obvious weight!
NUTRITION / EXERCISE / GENETICS
I was initially losing around 10 pounds a month. That has changed to about 5 pounds a month over the past six months. I know this is because I am eating more calories a day now. But, as long as the scale continues going down I will be happy. I am starting to worry a little that my weight loss window is closing ... but I can't focus on that. If I can walk again, without a walker, I will be extremely happy.
The weight loss surgery and the resulting weight loss has allowed me to have my knee joint replacement surgery. My first one was on November 3/08 and my next knee is scheduled for Feb 17/09. To have these surgeries and the rehabilitation behind me will finally allow me to go out and walk or do more physical workouts. I trust that the pounds will continue to drop once I get more physical. I have always thought that exercise was an important component of this journey - and have great frustration at my inability to participate in the usual cardio or key strength training routines because of my joint problems. I was stunned to learn recently that exercise is only 20% of the impact of a person's ability to lose weight. 10% is genetics and 70% is nutrition. !!! Did you ever know it was that high? I surely didn't.
EDEMA
The impact of edema/water weight is not to be taken lightly. I have struggled with edema in my lower limbs for the past several years. For the first month after my WLS, I actually didn't show any real weight loss (pount four pounds - i.e. - not even a pound!) because of weight gain from the edema. I was put on HCTZ and told to get compression hose. After this last knee surgery, once I arrived home from the rehabilitation centre, the edema started acting up again as I was off HCTZ and couldn't wear the compression hose. I gained about 14 pounds in around 10 days. Once I got the ok to go back on the HCTZ and wear the hose, I've gone back down the 14 pounds. Hopefully, this will continue. I had hoped to show a bit more of a loss this month. Instead, it is only coming in at under a pound. This darn edema is so tricky. It's hard to tell if I was really bad over Christmas and New Years or is it still the edema impacting the weight loss. Although I did have a couple of things I shouldn't have had, it doesn't account for not going down a few more pounds this month. Ahhh well. I should know by next month how much more edema there is to get rid of!
BLOOD WORK
I've been very routine about my blood work. My initial results are back on the last 6 tubes of blood taken for my 1 year anniversary. Everything looks great - finally. My iron levels are now in the normal range after being out of sorts for months. My b-vitamin levels look just fine too. While in the hospital, I was having problems with potassium levels - but that was straightened out after a week or so of them monitoring and adjusting medications.
SKIN
My skin is saggy and wrinkly in most areas. I was a pear-shaped woman - so my hips and thighs are bad - really bad. If I am ever lucky enough to be able to afford plastics, I'm going to need a thigh lift, a fleur-de-lys, brachioplasty and some help with my breasts. The girls aren't too, too bad - they fit in a bra fine but are so wrinkled I am embarassed to lean over. I look down and it looks like the body of an 80+ year old woman is down there. I am happy to be healthier - but man, that skin is sad to look at. I wonder if they are able to use it for anything once they remove the skin. It would be nice if it would help a burn victim or something ... but then I wonder, who on earth would want to have wrinkly, stretched skin like that? I saw a medical show the other day. A woman after MWL (massive wight loss) had 15 pounds of skin removed. Gadzukes! They had it in a bright pink garbage bag, sitting on the scale. It was impressive.
HAIR
I have a lot of wispy hair now that is a couple of inches long. Kind of like an aura around my head. I had a freak out in July or so with the hair loss. Overall, I'd say I lost about 1/2 to 2/3 of my total hair volume. I never took biotin as an extra supplement as I already had issues with excess body hair in places I didn't want it. Although taking the biotin supplement would have assisted with the hair and nail growth it wasn't worth it to me if my facial hair ended up worse! I started using the nioxin hair system (shampoo, conditioner and scalp treatment) in early August and saw an immediate lessening of the hair loss. And I am so encouraged by all this wispy hair growth. I look a little mussed up most of the time because of the aura .. BUT .... it's hair, and it'll grow! YAY!
NAILS
My fingernails have been a mess the past three months or so. The nails are soooooo soft at the ends, they rip and break with very little effort. I'm hoping that protein deficiency I experienced after the surgery will have them rebound soon. I'd say three months after the surgery I was getting a decent amount of protein in ... so these nails should be growing out to stronger nail bed lengths soon.
Is it worth it? Yes.
It's worth every jaw-droppingly good morsel I could (and do) dream about having.
Don't make food the thing you live for. Remember, it's nothing but crap in the end.
0 comments
Exactly 12 months ago, I was laying in my hospital bed, feeling drowzy, and trying to remember to sip my water. I felt fine.
Here are my results thus far:
January 1, 2003:
Weight = 425 pounds (BMI 70.7)
Consult Day in November 2007:
Weight = 316 pounds (BMI 52.6)
===> down 109 pounds and 76.25" from 2003
Surgery Day in January 2008:
Weight = 290.2 pounds (BMI 48.3)
===> down 134.8 pounds and 78.75" from 2003
===> down 25.8 pounds and 2.50" from consult day
6 Month Surgiversary July 2008:
Weight = 227.8 pounds (BMI 37.9)
===> down 197.2 pounds and 134.75" from 2003
===> down 88.2 pounds and 58.50" from consult day
===> down 62.4 pounds and 56.00" from surgery day
12 Month Surgiversary January 2009:
Weight = 195.2 pounds (BMI 32.5)
===> down 229.8 pounds and 168.00" from 2003
===> down 120.8 pounds and 91.75" from consult day
===> down 62.4 pounds and 89.25" from surgery day
===> down 32.6 pounds and 33.25" from 6 month surgiversay
The other day, someone posted a link on the RNY board about taking a home body fat test. It was easy to do with my book of self-measurements in hand. According to this test, I have 35.5% body fat - or 69 pounds of fat. Lovely. But still - a cool thing to know. I should be around 22% of body fat. Still a ways to go!
http://www.healthcentral.com/cholesterol/home-body-fat-test-2774-143.html?ic=4004
BODY IMAGE
It feels much better to be simply obese rather than super mobidly obese. Hard to think of those days - although my body image is still as if I was super mobidly obese. This past November, I had to be in hospital. I cringed each time they asked me to get up on stretchers, or beds, or into chairs or wheel chairs. They had to transport me from one hospital to another at one point, and they wanted me to get into a wheel chair. I told them that I wouldn't fit as it wasn't a bariatric chair. They told me to try it. I turned scarlet, shook my head, and had a go - all ready to be horrified when my big butt and hips would get stuck on the sides of the wheel chair. Of course all the people around me were mostly young men - my dreaded enemies all my life. I was just about ready to cry, knowing that I wouldn't fit, when I slipped right into the chair with no problem. I could NOT believe it. I kept looking around, waiting for the arm to fall off or something - sure that the thing was broken and I'd collapse on the ground. Well, it was fine. No problem at all. That was a real eye opener. I find myself at least trying chairs now. So far, none have collapsed or been too small. I get a little more confident each time. I wonder if we ever lose that fear? I sure hope so. Thinner people just don't realize all the extra baggage that fat folk carry around - beyond the obvious weight!
NUTRITION / EXERCISE / GENETICS
I was initially losing around 10 pounds a month. That has changed to about 5 pounds a month over the past six months. I know this is because I am eating more calories a day now. But, as long as the scale continues going down I will be happy. I am starting to worry a little that my weight loss window is closing ... but I can't focus on that. If I can walk again, without a walker, I will be extremely happy.
The weight loss surgery and the resulting weight loss has allowed me to have my knee joint replacement surgery. My first one was on November 3/08 and my next knee is scheduled for Feb 17/09. To have these surgeries and the rehabilitation behind me will finally allow me to go out and walk or do more physical workouts. I trust that the pounds will continue to drop once I get more physical. I have always thought that exercise was an important component of this journey - and have great frustration at my inability to participate in the usual cardio or key strength training routines because of my joint problems. I was stunned to learn recently that exercise is only 20% of the impact of a person's ability to lose weight. 10% is genetics and 70% is nutrition. !!! Did you ever know it was that high? I surely didn't.
EDEMA
The impact of edema/water weight is not to be taken lightly. I have struggled with edema in my lower limbs for the past several years. For the first month after my WLS, I actually didn't show any real weight loss (pount four pounds - i.e. - not even a pound!) because of weight gain from the edema. I was put on HCTZ and told to get compression hose. After this last knee surgery, once I arrived home from the rehabilitation centre, the edema started acting up again as I was off HCTZ and couldn't wear the compression hose. I gained about 14 pounds in around 10 days. Once I got the ok to go back on the HCTZ and wear the hose, I've gone back down the 14 pounds. Hopefully, this will continue. I had hoped to show a bit more of a loss this month. Instead, it is only coming in at under a pound. This darn edema is so tricky. It's hard to tell if I was really bad over Christmas and New Years or is it still the edema impacting the weight loss. Although I did have a couple of things I shouldn't have had, it doesn't account for not going down a few more pounds this month. Ahhh well. I should know by next month how much more edema there is to get rid of!
BLOOD WORK
I've been very routine about my blood work. My initial results are back on the last 6 tubes of blood taken for my 1 year anniversary. Everything looks great - finally. My iron levels are now in the normal range after being out of sorts for months. My b-vitamin levels look just fine too. While in the hospital, I was having problems with potassium levels - but that was straightened out after a week or so of them monitoring and adjusting medications.
SKIN
My skin is saggy and wrinkly in most areas. I was a pear-shaped woman - so my hips and thighs are bad - really bad. If I am ever lucky enough to be able to afford plastics, I'm going to need a thigh lift, a fleur-de-lys, brachioplasty and some help with my breasts. The girls aren't too, too bad - they fit in a bra fine but are so wrinkled I am embarassed to lean over. I look down and it looks like the body of an 80+ year old woman is down there. I am happy to be healthier - but man, that skin is sad to look at. I wonder if they are able to use it for anything once they remove the skin. It would be nice if it would help a burn victim or something ... but then I wonder, who on earth would want to have wrinkly, stretched skin like that? I saw a medical show the other day. A woman after MWL (massive wight loss) had 15 pounds of skin removed. Gadzukes! They had it in a bright pink garbage bag, sitting on the scale. It was impressive.
HAIR
I have a lot of wispy hair now that is a couple of inches long. Kind of like an aura around my head. I had a freak out in July or so with the hair loss. Overall, I'd say I lost about 1/2 to 2/3 of my total hair volume. I never took biotin as an extra supplement as I already had issues with excess body hair in places I didn't want it. Although taking the biotin supplement would have assisted with the hair and nail growth it wasn't worth it to me if my facial hair ended up worse! I started using the nioxin hair system (shampoo, conditioner and scalp treatment) in early August and saw an immediate lessening of the hair loss. And I am so encouraged by all this wispy hair growth. I look a little mussed up most of the time because of the aura .. BUT .... it's hair, and it'll grow! YAY!
NAILS
My fingernails have been a mess the past three months or so. The nails are soooooo soft at the ends, they rip and break with very little effort. I'm hoping that protein deficiency I experienced after the surgery will have them rebound soon. I'd say three months after the surgery I was getting a decent amount of protein in ... so these nails should be growing out to stronger nail bed lengths soon.
Is it worth it? Yes.
It's worth every jaw-droppingly good morsel I could (and do) dream about having.
Don't make food the thing you live for. Remember, it's nothing but crap in the end.
Stuffed Sausages
Dec 29, 2008
After my knee surgery, I couldn't use my compression stockings. Of course, while in the hospital for 3 weeks, I really didn't need them. I was either walking/doing physio or laying on my bed. My ankles were nice and shapely - my legs looked long as I actually HAD ankles. (I usually have cankles.) I come home and over the recovery weeks - although I still have physio and knee strengthening exercises to do - I am now sitting in chairs more often.
And guess what? My edema started coming back in full force again. *sigh* The scale started creeping up because of all this stupid water weight. ARGHHHH! I'm having deja-vu - it seems just like January 2008 - when I didn't lose any weight the first month after my WLS. My edema was so bad back then. My lower legs look like stuffed sausages again. The skin is pulled tight ...
Anyhow - I've gone back on the water pills (HCTZ) and started wearing my super sexy (not) compression stockings. My skin is freaking out every night after I take them off .... it's been breathing and free for a couple of months so strapping them back into those tight stockings are taking a toll. I scratch, and scratch and scratch and scratch and then scratch some more. This will pass after a while ... but man - I'm so over these stockings.
I read on the main RNY board where another lady (Jupiter6/Shari), who has done a stupendous job of losing weight after her RNY surgery (200+ pounds!!), still has problems with edema. Her doctors chalk it up to the weight of her pannus over the years damaging her leg circulation. So, even though she's now down below 160 pounds, she still needs to wear her compression hosiery. She and I sound similar - heavy "aprons" of fat, pre-surgery. So, I'm guessing I've probably done similar damage to myself. I was so hoping to have normal legs after all the changes. I guess I should be thankful that they have ways to control the side-effects of the edema. Ahhhh well. Being fat impacts so many parts of a person - not just health and fitness - but obviously emotionally, socially .... and I guess some things, no matter how much you try, you can never make right. You're given one chance at this life - some parts you have opportunities for do-overs. But some things you damage beyond repair.
Tsk-tsk on me. That is my one regret. I wish I had this surgery years ago. I wonder what else would have different?
0 comments
And guess what? My edema started coming back in full force again. *sigh* The scale started creeping up because of all this stupid water weight. ARGHHHH! I'm having deja-vu - it seems just like January 2008 - when I didn't lose any weight the first month after my WLS. My edema was so bad back then. My lower legs look like stuffed sausages again. The skin is pulled tight ...
Anyhow - I've gone back on the water pills (HCTZ) and started wearing my super sexy (not) compression stockings. My skin is freaking out every night after I take them off .... it's been breathing and free for a couple of months so strapping them back into those tight stockings are taking a toll. I scratch, and scratch and scratch and scratch and then scratch some more. This will pass after a while ... but man - I'm so over these stockings.
I read on the main RNY board where another lady (Jupiter6/Shari), who has done a stupendous job of losing weight after her RNY surgery (200+ pounds!!), still has problems with edema. Her doctors chalk it up to the weight of her pannus over the years damaging her leg circulation. So, even though she's now down below 160 pounds, she still needs to wear her compression hosiery. She and I sound similar - heavy "aprons" of fat, pre-surgery. So, I'm guessing I've probably done similar damage to myself. I was so hoping to have normal legs after all the changes. I guess I should be thankful that they have ways to control the side-effects of the edema. Ahhhh well. Being fat impacts so many parts of a person - not just health and fitness - but obviously emotionally, socially .... and I guess some things, no matter how much you try, you can never make right. You're given one chance at this life - some parts you have opportunities for do-overs. But some things you damage beyond repair.
Tsk-tsk on me. That is my one regret. I wish I had this surgery years ago. I wonder what else would have different?
Onederland !!
Nov 24, 2008
I'm just back from the hospital after having my first of two total knee replacements. Some time over the hospital stay, I finally broke through the 200-pound barrier and I am now officially in Onederland! FA-LA-LA-LA-LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LA-LA-LA-LAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 
I had noticed that the skin on my torso and thighs was sagging more than usual, so I had high hopes that I was down. It was a great present to come home to!! I weighed in at 191.6 pounds .... I add about 3 or 4 pounds to get to my surgeon's scale number ..... so that is definitely under 200 now! YAHOOOOOOO!
Here it is just over one year since my consult with Dr Graber, or 10 months since my surgery, and I'm down over 120 pounds. I'm down over 235 from my heaviest. Hard to believe. So much extra skin and saggy bits. Oh well. Well worth it though! I'd much rather be healthier than to have taut skin! I have cleavage from my boobs down to my pubic area. Looks just lovely.
I hope to have my second knee replacement in the New Year - somewhere around February. I CANNOT WAIT to be able to walk properly. Life is good! Now go out and enjoy it!!!
Hugs to you all!
2 comments
I had noticed that the skin on my torso and thighs was sagging more than usual, so I had high hopes that I was down. It was a great present to come home to!! I weighed in at 191.6 pounds .... I add about 3 or 4 pounds to get to my surgeon's scale number ..... so that is definitely under 200 now! YAHOOOOOOO!
Here it is just over one year since my consult with Dr Graber, or 10 months since my surgery, and I'm down over 120 pounds. I'm down over 235 from my heaviest. Hard to believe. So much extra skin and saggy bits. Oh well. Well worth it though! I'd much rather be healthier than to have taut skin! I have cleavage from my boobs down to my pubic area. Looks just lovely.
I hope to have my second knee replacement in the New Year - somewhere around February. I CANNOT WAIT to be able to walk properly. Life is good! Now go out and enjoy it!!!
Hugs to you all!
Times, they are a-changin'
Oct 25, 2008
Well, one week from tomorrow and I will hopefully be recuperating from my first total knee replacement surgery. My right knee will be the first one to become bionic. Man, I cannot wait. I am soooooo excited. I know there will be a lot of pain and discomfort. Months of rehab. But just think: it's going to let me start on the road to actually walking again. Wow!! It has been so very long since I walked unaided.
This surgery changes so many things. It closes doors (that one wants firmly shut) and opens up all kinds of windows and doors that you never had a chance at before. Isn't that something wonderful? Isn't it great that you can get a chance to do a do-over at 46 years of age? I screwed up some important years of my life by being morbidly obese. It shut me out from doing things I wanted to do. But I've been granted the option to do it all again. Yes, I won't be a teenager, or in my 20's or even my 30's. But you don't have to be those ages to experience specific things in your life. Age is nothing but a number. Your will and your body are the things that allow you to do things. You have to have both working for you. Part of my will has always been there - but my body, and the part of my will that controlled my food intake were not with the program. WLS is now aligning my will and my body so I can do my dreams.
My husband has never known me as a thin or plump person. We met when I was at my heaviest. He's only known me this way. At the time, my arthritis had not yet kicked in. So when we shared with each other our dreams and aspirations, my looming disability was not known. A few months after our marriage in Oct 2000, my arthritis started acting up. By the summer of 2001 I couldn't walk without a cane. And it progressed from there. Instead of a being a life partner, a friend, a lover he became my assistant, my cabana boy, my chef, my personal shopper, my bather. Nothing what we dreamed about.
As my body mass lessens, I feel a certain lightness. I'm still troubled by the arthritis, but I feel like once these knees are done, there will be so many options for me. I WANT TO TRAVEL. I WANT TO SEE THINGS. I WANT TO MEET PEOPLE. I WANT TO VISIT. I WANT TO SHOP AND EXPLORE. Lots of "I want's" in there. I worry that I'll become more selfish. I'm going to have to watch that.
My husband worries a bit that I will change too much. I will want to party or something - instead of doing the things we had talked about. I don't fel a need to party. I have itchy feet - I want to see places and not to be stuck because of my body limitations.
I travelled as a youngster. My Dad worked with the UN and CIDA - so my family travelled far and wide when I was growing up. We lived in Ghana, Iran, Sri Lanka, Pakistan ... with many other countries visited while we were posted away in the Middle East and Asia. These cultures are in my blood (not by birth, but by nurturing). I want to see them, and others again.
I C A N ' T W A I T F O R L I F E T O S T A R T A G A I N !!!
This surgery changes so many things. It closes doors (that one wants firmly shut) and opens up all kinds of windows and doors that you never had a chance at before. Isn't that something wonderful? Isn't it great that you can get a chance to do a do-over at 46 years of age? I screwed up some important years of my life by being morbidly obese. It shut me out from doing things I wanted to do. But I've been granted the option to do it all again. Yes, I won't be a teenager, or in my 20's or even my 30's. But you don't have to be those ages to experience specific things in your life. Age is nothing but a number. Your will and your body are the things that allow you to do things. You have to have both working for you. Part of my will has always been there - but my body, and the part of my will that controlled my food intake were not with the program. WLS is now aligning my will and my body so I can do my dreams.
My husband has never known me as a thin or plump person. We met when I was at my heaviest. He's only known me this way. At the time, my arthritis had not yet kicked in. So when we shared with each other our dreams and aspirations, my looming disability was not known. A few months after our marriage in Oct 2000, my arthritis started acting up. By the summer of 2001 I couldn't walk without a cane. And it progressed from there. Instead of a being a life partner, a friend, a lover he became my assistant, my cabana boy, my chef, my personal shopper, my bather. Nothing what we dreamed about.
As my body mass lessens, I feel a certain lightness. I'm still troubled by the arthritis, but I feel like once these knees are done, there will be so many options for me. I WANT TO TRAVEL. I WANT TO SEE THINGS. I WANT TO MEET PEOPLE. I WANT TO VISIT. I WANT TO SHOP AND EXPLORE. Lots of "I want's" in there. I worry that I'll become more selfish. I'm going to have to watch that.
My husband worries a bit that I will change too much. I will want to party or something - instead of doing the things we had talked about. I don't fel a need to party. I have itchy feet - I want to see places and not to be stuck because of my body limitations.
I travelled as a youngster. My Dad worked with the UN and CIDA - so my family travelled far and wide when I was growing up. We lived in Ghana, Iran, Sri Lanka, Pakistan ... with many other countries visited while we were posted away in the Middle East and Asia. These cultures are in my blood (not by birth, but by nurturing). I want to see them, and others again.
I C A N ' T W A I T F O R L I F E T O S T A R T A G A I N !!!
Addictions
Sep 26, 2008
Well, we all know that food was an addiction for us before surgery. After surgery, you have to focus on finding replacement addictions. We usually have the type of personality that easily falls prey to addictions .... so replacement addictions are super important.
One hears a lot of sliding into gambling, shopping or sex. For me, so far, it's shopping. I'm spending far too much time, energy and money on shopping. In particular, on Etsy. It's bad. I must stop. I must find an alternate.
I can't wait until my knee surgeries are behind me. Wouldn't it be something wonderful if my alternate addiction turned into sports or walking or swimming. Physical movement. What a lovely addiction that would be.
Went in for another round of hospital visits with the knee surgeon. It's a go now for surgery on my first knee - my right one. My surgey date is November 3rd ... with a potential of moving it up if there is a cancellation or something. I dread the surgery - as I'm having a spinal .... I don't want to know, hear or see anything while in that operating room. BUT - I can't wait to get going on moving again. The surgery will have me one step closer to moving like I want. They want to do my other knee shortly after the first. Something about lessening the chance of damage to my new bionic knee by fixing the other dud one as soon as possible.
Lots of changes coming soon. I can't wait.
I want an alternate.
Hairless
Aug 24, 2008
I'd have to say the one thing I have had the hardest time with is dealing with the loss of my hair. Before surgery, I would always receive compliments on the beauty of my hair. Literally, my crowning glory. Long, thick, shiny and very healthy. *sigh*
It seems so long ago.
I've lost between 1/2 to 2/3 of my hair volume. I'm just going by the size of the remaining hairs when I go to pull them into a pony tail. I don't actually put my hair in a pony tail. I'm even more careful with my precious hair than I was previously. I used to braid it and but a scrunchy in at the bottom. As that actually puts stress on your hair, I stopped doing that about a month after surgery.
I only wash my hair once a week (more often, and it gets puff-ball and frizzy). I never blow dry, crimp, straighten or fuss with it. I don't put "product" in it. I use quality shampoos. I always condition. I end every wash with a cold-water rinse.
I, too, was one of those post-WLS patients that found horrifying quantities of hair in the shower drain. The worst was probably months 4 thru 7.
In despair, I went to a specialty salon - wondering if a hair piece would help. They tried several things ... but it turns out that I have so little hair left that you see the clips or combs or pins that hold the hair piece secure. Woe is me.
So, I spent a bajillion dollars on the Nioxin hair treatment system. I use the three items - the shampoo cleanser, the conditioner scalp treatment, and then the leave-in restorer. From the first treatement, there was a significant lessening of hair loss. That's all I can ask for and I'm very pleased.
I'm hoping that some new hair will grow in to replace all those that were lost. Crap. I really hate this part of the whole process.
It's like losing part of your identify to lose your hair.
It seems so long ago.
I've lost between 1/2 to 2/3 of my hair volume. I'm just going by the size of the remaining hairs when I go to pull them into a pony tail. I don't actually put my hair in a pony tail. I'm even more careful with my precious hair than I was previously. I used to braid it and but a scrunchy in at the bottom. As that actually puts stress on your hair, I stopped doing that about a month after surgery.
I only wash my hair once a week (more often, and it gets puff-ball and frizzy). I never blow dry, crimp, straighten or fuss with it. I don't put "product" in it. I use quality shampoos. I always condition. I end every wash with a cold-water rinse.
I, too, was one of those post-WLS patients that found horrifying quantities of hair in the shower drain. The worst was probably months 4 thru 7.
In despair, I went to a specialty salon - wondering if a hair piece would help. They tried several things ... but it turns out that I have so little hair left that you see the clips or combs or pins that hold the hair piece secure. Woe is me.
So, I spent a bajillion dollars on the Nioxin hair treatment system. I use the three items - the shampoo cleanser, the conditioner scalp treatment, and then the leave-in restorer. From the first treatement, there was a significant lessening of hair loss. That's all I can ask for and I'm very pleased.
I'm hoping that some new hair will grow in to replace all those that were lost. Crap. I really hate this part of the whole process.
It's like losing part of your identify to lose your hair.
Six Months after the Cut and Snip
Jul 11, 2008
Today is my six month surgiversary.
Exactly 6 months ago, I was laying in my hospital bed, feeling drowzy, and trying to remember to sip my water. I felt fine.
What always has to come up at this point of the "conversation" is how much have you lost? I'm never sure what starting to point to use. There are so many choices! At my known heaviest, the hospital scale had me at 425 pounds. I've been at the mercy of my crappy old scale since then ... and for the years in between, I'm now a little sketchy on exactly how accurate it was. Its problems all came to light after I started on my WLS journey. When comparing my 'at-home' weight with that at my surgeons office, I was horrified to find out my scale at home was about 20 pounds off from my doctor's! And of course, my scale would show me lighter than my doctor's. Of course. You all knew that right? In a combination of shock and fury, I purchased a whiz-bang new scale, highly recommended by funkifiederin, and have finally come to terms with much more reasonable poundage expectations. I always add 3 - 4 pounds between my actual weight at the point of weighing and what I record. This because my doctor's office scale is always with my clothes and shoes on, and in the afternoon. I don't want to have these repeated weight shocks between my home and the doctor's office any more. And since I've had the new scale - no problem. YAY!
I weigh myself about once a week. I make my official record once a month. I also measure myself once a month. I track the weight and measurement changes in a journal so I have things going back to January 2003. My monthly measurements are of the following: neck, bust, rib cage, waist, hips, upper and lower thigh on both legs, my ankles, my wrists, and finally, upper and lower arm measurements on each arm. I didn't bother with my calves because of my problem with edema. Inititally, I also ignored the changes recorded for my ankles for the same reason. Since I've been wearing compression stockings for a few months now, things have calmed down significantly and the measurements are consistent. I WISH I had started at the beginning with the measurement around my shoulders. However, to do this, you'd have to have another person with you to take the measurement. I know I've lost a lot around there and it would have been so cool to see the changes. (Method: stand straight with your arms dangling by your side. Your assistant would put the tape measure around your upper arm, across your back, around the other upper arm and across your chest - the tape measuring around on the outside of your arms.)
Anyhow, here are my details thus far:
January 1, 2003:
Weight = 425 pounds (BMI 70.7)
One year ago in July 2007:
Weight = 345 pounds (BMI 57.4)
===> down 80 pounds and 52.75 " from 2003
Consult Day in November 2007:
Weight = 316 pounds (BMI 52.6)
===> down 109 pounds and 76.25" from 2003
===> down 29 pounds and 23.50" from July 2007
Surgery Day in January 2008:
Weight = 290.2 pounds (BMI 48.3)
===> down 134.8 pounds and 78.75" from 2003
===> down 54.8 pounds and 26.00" from July 2007
===> down 25.8 pounds and 2.50" from consult day
6 Month Surgiversary July 2008:
Weight = 227.8 pounds (BMI 37.9)
===> down 197.2 pounds and 134.75" from 2003
===> down 117.2 pounds and 82.00" from July 2007
===> down 88.2 pounds and 58.50" from consult day
===> down 62.4 pounds and 56.00" from surgery day
I am obese now. That's so much better than being morbidly obese ... or even super morbidly obese. Weird to think of myself as having been that label. Marie was super morbidly obese.
I have seemed to lose about 10 pounds a month or so every month after surgery. I do no real exercises because of my disabilities. I do stretches and such when I'm in bed, lift some weights ... about as much as I can do until I get my knee joints replaced.
On that front, I am currently on the waiting list. I went to my knee surgeon in late May and he ok'd me for surgery. So I'm on 'THE LIST'. For you non-Canucks, although our health care, like surgey, is free to us, we have wait lists for elective surgery. I could be going in for surgery any time between August and November for my first knee. The second knee would be replaced about 3 months later. I cannot believe this is finally before me. It has been such a looooooong road. So many doctors refused to do the surgery on me because of my age and my weight. I finally found a fabulous surgeon, who specializes in knee replacements, in Ottawa, who would do the knee replacements if I had lost weight. Well baby, my time has COME! Thanks to the surgery, I'm there.
I MUST admit I have not greeted my weight loss stats since surgery with a lot of joy and happiness. Stupid, I know. All weight loss is good. It is soooooo very difficult to not focus on those postings were people have lost like 75 pounds in three months. As that is not a good feeling for me, personally, I have to shake my head and try, desperately, to NOT focus on the actual poundage. Don't pay attention to other people's numbers. As selfish as it sounds, I am in this for me. I have to lose the weight, with whatever numbers I'm given, at whatever rate I can, to just plain, be me. That's really all this is for. I want to live. And the life I want to live, I want it to be better for not only me, but also the people in my life that I love.
I can't wait to actually go for a walk with my husband. And then, the icing on the cake: to hold his hand as we walk along together. I haven't been able to do either of these things for years.
Is it worth it? Yes.
It's worth every jaw-droppingly good morsel I could (and do) dream about having.
Don't make food the thing you live for. Remember, it's nothing but crap in the end.
Exactly 6 months ago, I was laying in my hospital bed, feeling drowzy, and trying to remember to sip my water. I felt fine.
What always has to come up at this point of the "conversation" is how much have you lost? I'm never sure what starting to point to use. There are so many choices! At my known heaviest, the hospital scale had me at 425 pounds. I've been at the mercy of my crappy old scale since then ... and for the years in between, I'm now a little sketchy on exactly how accurate it was. Its problems all came to light after I started on my WLS journey. When comparing my 'at-home' weight with that at my surgeons office, I was horrified to find out my scale at home was about 20 pounds off from my doctor's! And of course, my scale would show me lighter than my doctor's. Of course. You all knew that right? In a combination of shock and fury, I purchased a whiz-bang new scale, highly recommended by funkifiederin, and have finally come to terms with much more reasonable poundage expectations. I always add 3 - 4 pounds between my actual weight at the point of weighing and what I record. This because my doctor's office scale is always with my clothes and shoes on, and in the afternoon. I don't want to have these repeated weight shocks between my home and the doctor's office any more. And since I've had the new scale - no problem. YAY!
I weigh myself about once a week. I make my official record once a month. I also measure myself once a month. I track the weight and measurement changes in a journal so I have things going back to January 2003. My monthly measurements are of the following: neck, bust, rib cage, waist, hips, upper and lower thigh on both legs, my ankles, my wrists, and finally, upper and lower arm measurements on each arm. I didn't bother with my calves because of my problem with edema. Inititally, I also ignored the changes recorded for my ankles for the same reason. Since I've been wearing compression stockings for a few months now, things have calmed down significantly and the measurements are consistent. I WISH I had started at the beginning with the measurement around my shoulders. However, to do this, you'd have to have another person with you to take the measurement. I know I've lost a lot around there and it would have been so cool to see the changes. (Method: stand straight with your arms dangling by your side. Your assistant would put the tape measure around your upper arm, across your back, around the other upper arm and across your chest - the tape measuring around on the outside of your arms.)
Anyhow, here are my details thus far:
January 1, 2003:
Weight = 425 pounds (BMI 70.7)
One year ago in July 2007:
Weight = 345 pounds (BMI 57.4)
===> down 80 pounds and 52.75 " from 2003
Consult Day in November 2007:
Weight = 316 pounds (BMI 52.6)
===> down 109 pounds and 76.25" from 2003
===> down 29 pounds and 23.50" from July 2007
Surgery Day in January 2008:
Weight = 290.2 pounds (BMI 48.3)
===> down 134.8 pounds and 78.75" from 2003
===> down 54.8 pounds and 26.00" from July 2007
===> down 25.8 pounds and 2.50" from consult day
6 Month Surgiversary July 2008:
Weight = 227.8 pounds (BMI 37.9)
===> down 197.2 pounds and 134.75" from 2003
===> down 117.2 pounds and 82.00" from July 2007
===> down 88.2 pounds and 58.50" from consult day
===> down 62.4 pounds and 56.00" from surgery day
I am obese now. That's so much better than being morbidly obese ... or even super morbidly obese. Weird to think of myself as having been that label. Marie was super morbidly obese.
I have seemed to lose about 10 pounds a month or so every month after surgery. I do no real exercises because of my disabilities. I do stretches and such when I'm in bed, lift some weights ... about as much as I can do until I get my knee joints replaced.
On that front, I am currently on the waiting list. I went to my knee surgeon in late May and he ok'd me for surgery. So I'm on 'THE LIST'. For you non-Canucks, although our health care, like surgey, is free to us, we have wait lists for elective surgery. I could be going in for surgery any time between August and November for my first knee. The second knee would be replaced about 3 months later. I cannot believe this is finally before me. It has been such a looooooong road. So many doctors refused to do the surgery on me because of my age and my weight. I finally found a fabulous surgeon, who specializes in knee replacements, in Ottawa, who would do the knee replacements if I had lost weight. Well baby, my time has COME! Thanks to the surgery, I'm there.
I MUST admit I have not greeted my weight loss stats since surgery with a lot of joy and happiness. Stupid, I know. All weight loss is good. It is soooooo very difficult to not focus on those postings were people have lost like 75 pounds in three months. As that is not a good feeling for me, personally, I have to shake my head and try, desperately, to NOT focus on the actual poundage. Don't pay attention to other people's numbers. As selfish as it sounds, I am in this for me. I have to lose the weight, with whatever numbers I'm given, at whatever rate I can, to just plain, be me. That's really all this is for. I want to live. And the life I want to live, I want it to be better for not only me, but also the people in my life that I love.
I can't wait to actually go for a walk with my husband. And then, the icing on the cake: to hold his hand as we walk along together. I haven't been able to do either of these things for years.
Is it worth it? Yes.
It's worth every jaw-droppingly good morsel I could (and do) dream about having.
Don't make food the thing you live for. Remember, it's nothing but crap in the end.
Wrinkles, 38DDD, Asymmetry
Jun 09, 2008
Well, it's kinda interesting to get used to your ever-changing body. For years and years you get used to the curves, fullness and little nooks and crannies. Then, things they are a-changing.
I don't know how many times I've found myself having a little freak out session, convinced myself I'm dieing of some tumour when I feel weird bumps under my skin. You know what it is? bones. Yup, bones. I think the weirdest ones to me are my hip bones. I am a pear-shaped fat person with tremendouse hips and thighs. When I sit, I can rest my hands on my hips ... and then I start feeling this huge protuberance. To me, it's no where near where my hips are. It's like half way along my belly. Then I lay down and do the same nervous touchings along my belly and feel them again. What the heck are these things??? Them's my hip bones. Lordy, there used to be so much fat covering them that I always pictured them out farther because my hips were so darn big. But now that the fat is melting, they're being uncovered - like some archeological dig or something. How weird it is to be 45 and to not have a clue what's going on with your own body.
I do love the feel of my collar bones. I'll sit there and tap my fingers on the clavicle. Kinda like I'm playing piano. That parts fun. Always.
I find that I'm not really symmetrical in my weight loss. I posted my problem on OH, wondering if anyone else has this problem. I'm not talking about losing more weight up top than on the bottom .... i'm talking about losing more weight on my left belly side over my right belly side. Odd, huh? I never thought about that as a possibility. Of course, what happens, when I post that everyone immediately think it's a hernia. But, this larger bulge of fat is no where near any of the incision ports for my lap RNY. And, it's around 4-5" to the right of my belly button. Anyhow, I followed up with the doctors and they all said: "nope, it's just fat. Don't worry." Well, that's good, I know. I just hope that the right side will loosen up and deflate to at least some thing similar as my right left side. It's still cool to lay down and be able to see all the way down to my toes, and see all the geography in between. No hills of fat hiding all the details. YAY!
I was falling out of my bras. You know, you set those boobs (a nice name for them, when they're really like loose sacks) all in place, then take your hands out of your bra, and everything just falls. The ribcage part is so loose that the material doesn't know what to do. The girls just lay down like their too tired to show their stuff. The cups are all wrinkled because there is nothing filling them. *sigh*
So, out I go, on my quest for a bra. You know what? 38DDD. I can't believe it. Firstly, it's a 38. THIRTY EIGHT. I cannot remember the last time I was in a 38. For real. The triple D was a shock. I've never been that big ... but I was probably wearing the wrong bra size all along. Oh well. DDD sounds so ridiculously big. Huge, mammoth sized mammaries. But no, they look good. They don't look ridiculous at all. They're all pert-almost! Can you imagine that? Anyhow, it feels wonderful to be wearing a bra fortress again. You know, one that actually FEELS like it's doing something there than just another layer of clothes on your body.
I've been using bio-oil religiously over my entire body for about 1 1/2 months now. I slap it on twice a day. Everywhere. Hoping that it will help. It says you won't see any improvement for 3 months. I go through a bottle in about a week. Thems a lot of bottles over three months. If it helps in ANY way, I'd be happy.
Because I was once so huge, my skin has been stretched beyond ... well .. let's just say it's been stretched. I look down and my skin looks like that of an 80 or 90 year old woman. There are wrinkles everywhere because the skin is just hanging. SOOOOOO attractive. Without looking at yourself, when you realize you have bones, and the anatomy of your body is becoming something more normal and less bulbous and round, in your head you're not seeing the wrinkles you get after a massive weight loss. I close my eyes and just think I'm a bajillion times healthier than before. I will be a bajillion times more mobile than I have been. Soon. YAY
God is good.
I don't know how many times I've found myself having a little freak out session, convinced myself I'm dieing of some tumour when I feel weird bumps under my skin. You know what it is? bones. Yup, bones. I think the weirdest ones to me are my hip bones. I am a pear-shaped fat person with tremendouse hips and thighs. When I sit, I can rest my hands on my hips ... and then I start feeling this huge protuberance. To me, it's no where near where my hips are. It's like half way along my belly. Then I lay down and do the same nervous touchings along my belly and feel them again. What the heck are these things??? Them's my hip bones. Lordy, there used to be so much fat covering them that I always pictured them out farther because my hips were so darn big. But now that the fat is melting, they're being uncovered - like some archeological dig or something. How weird it is to be 45 and to not have a clue what's going on with your own body.
I do love the feel of my collar bones. I'll sit there and tap my fingers on the clavicle. Kinda like I'm playing piano. That parts fun. Always.
I find that I'm not really symmetrical in my weight loss. I posted my problem on OH, wondering if anyone else has this problem. I'm not talking about losing more weight up top than on the bottom .... i'm talking about losing more weight on my left belly side over my right belly side. Odd, huh? I never thought about that as a possibility. Of course, what happens, when I post that everyone immediately think it's a hernia. But, this larger bulge of fat is no where near any of the incision ports for my lap RNY. And, it's around 4-5" to the right of my belly button. Anyhow, I followed up with the doctors and they all said: "nope, it's just fat. Don't worry." Well, that's good, I know. I just hope that the right side will loosen up and deflate to at least some thing similar as my right left side. It's still cool to lay down and be able to see all the way down to my toes, and see all the geography in between. No hills of fat hiding all the details. YAY!
I was falling out of my bras. You know, you set those boobs (a nice name for them, when they're really like loose sacks) all in place, then take your hands out of your bra, and everything just falls. The ribcage part is so loose that the material doesn't know what to do. The girls just lay down like their too tired to show their stuff. The cups are all wrinkled because there is nothing filling them. *sigh*
So, out I go, on my quest for a bra. You know what? 38DDD. I can't believe it. Firstly, it's a 38. THIRTY EIGHT. I cannot remember the last time I was in a 38. For real. The triple D was a shock. I've never been that big ... but I was probably wearing the wrong bra size all along. Oh well. DDD sounds so ridiculously big. Huge, mammoth sized mammaries. But no, they look good. They don't look ridiculous at all. They're all pert-almost! Can you imagine that? Anyhow, it feels wonderful to be wearing a bra fortress again. You know, one that actually FEELS like it's doing something there than just another layer of clothes on your body.
I've been using bio-oil religiously over my entire body for about 1 1/2 months now. I slap it on twice a day. Everywhere. Hoping that it will help. It says you won't see any improvement for 3 months. I go through a bottle in about a week. Thems a lot of bottles over three months. If it helps in ANY way, I'd be happy.
Because I was once so huge, my skin has been stretched beyond ... well .. let's just say it's been stretched. I look down and my skin looks like that of an 80 or 90 year old woman. There are wrinkles everywhere because the skin is just hanging. SOOOOOO attractive. Without looking at yourself, when you realize you have bones, and the anatomy of your body is becoming something more normal and less bulbous and round, in your head you're not seeing the wrinkles you get after a massive weight loss. I close my eyes and just think I'm a bajillion times healthier than before. I will be a bajillion times more mobile than I have been. Soon. YAY
God is good.
Skinny Decaf Cinnamon Dolce Lattes
May 31, 2008
Lately, I have been REALLY enjoying Starbucks skinny decaf cinnamon dolce lattes. I was never really a big Starbucks person. I don't live or work close to one. Because of my disabilities, drive-thrus are popular with me. There aren't too many drive thru Starbucks ... I think there may be one on the way to Kanata .. maybe near Eagleson Road? But never been there. I must go.
Anyhow - since discovering these skinny lattes, that's all I've been thinking about. You can get a vente-size, which means 24 oz of goodness. *sigh* They are sooooo yummy. So, not only is that terrific with fluid intake .. but it's only 110 calories and 11 grams of protein! Yeeehaaaa! Because of my schedule, I'm LUCKY if I am able to get one of these a week. They're expensive - like over $5.00 - so that's a good thing.
Sugar free, fat free ... The cinnamon is lovely .. but you can get other shots instead of cinnamon. I also quite like the vanilla one too.
Highly recommended by me to all.
Anyhow - since discovering these skinny lattes, that's all I've been thinking about. You can get a vente-size, which means 24 oz of goodness. *sigh* They are sooooo yummy. So, not only is that terrific with fluid intake .. but it's only 110 calories and 11 grams of protein! Yeeehaaaa! Because of my schedule, I'm LUCKY if I am able to get one of these a week. They're expensive - like over $5.00 - so that's a good thing.
Sugar free, fat free ... The cinnamon is lovely .. but you can get other shots instead of cinnamon. I also quite like the vanilla one too.
Highly recommended by me to all.
About Me
ON
Location
30.9
BMI
Surgery
01/11/2008
Surgery Date
Aug 02, 2007
Member Since
