MnShadows
November 1, 2001
This has definitely been a journey to get to this point. I was always larger than other children, but not really overweight, then overweight in early teens, then thin in later teens, married with two children by age twenty. Then the real battle began, after my babies were born. I am sure ya'll know what I am talking about. Gain a few pounds, diet, lose a few pounds, and gain it all back plus a few. I am thirty three now, and feeling older than I should most days. I am very active now, but am so excited about the energy that I will have after I have my new weight loss tools in place. There really is no telling what I will be up to then.
I have found a surgeon, and just completed the packet of information that they requested. I am mailing it back today; I will let you know how it goes from here.
I have just finished my medical history over the phone with Janet, one of Dr Stoner's office staff. She was extremely polite, and very helpful. She seems to think that I will have no problem being approved. She is sending my first letter of medical necessity to the insurance company today by fax. I have an apt for consultation on December 11th. I will keep you posted on how it goes.
I haven't been for my consult yet, it is still five days away. I am really excited but nervous at the same time. Wish me luck! :o)
I had my consultation with Dr Stoner this afternoon. It went so well and I am so excited. He is an older surgeon, and is sort of odd but I like him. He was very nice and was willing to discuss anything I wanted with him. He asked what type of weight loss surgery I was interested in, and gave me the in's and outs of all of them. He never tried to talk me into anything else though. We spoke for about an hour in the waiting room. Mine was the last apt of the day so I had him all to myself. That was nice. He also enquired about what I knew about the surgery before he got started. He wanted to make sure that I understood all the terms and procedures. He was very thorough. Then after that I was showed to an exam room. My husband was with me the whole time. He gave me a basic physical, listened to my heart checked my blood pressure, checked my breathing, etc. Then he asked me to lie down and he checked my abdominal area for the shape and size, and to see if I had any tenderness or scar tissue from any previous surgery. After all was said and done he said I would be a good candidate for the Lap. RNY. I wanted to shout it from the roof tops. I am so excited. Now is the hard part still not word from my insurance company. I hate waiting. UGH. I am almost there though. I have to say it did cross my mind that this is a really drastic step after I left the surgeons, but upon reflection some of the diets that I have put my self through are just as drastic. I am gonna do this for me. :o)
I just wanted to say Merry Christmas, and I wish you all the best in the coming year.
Happy new year everyone. Still no word from my insurance provider. This has to be the worst part so far. I am going to go crazy waiting. Until then I am bugging them to death with phone calls. Wish me luck!
Still no word from my insurance company. I have been calling, and e mailing them every other day. The only thing that I do know for sure is that they haven't turned me down. My case is being medically reviewed for necessity. My insurance has exclusion for WLS, but then the exclusion has exclusion. The exclusion says that WLS is not cover in any way shape for form basically. Then the exclusion on the exclusion says that if you are 100lbs or more overweight that they will cover it. Go figure. Anyway, the waiting is the worst.
I got yet another e mail from my insurance company today. It said that they are done with the medical review, and it has been passed on to the plan administrator for their final decision. So I guess in the long run one person gets to decide my future. In the mean time I am still waiting. Impatiently!
OMG!!! I am APPROVED!!! I got a call from Janet at Dr. Stoners office today and she said they had just been faxed my approval. I don't know what to feel now.. I was so excited I called one of my best friends in
Boy, things are really happening fast around here. I was approved on Monday, and Tuesday Janet was calling to set up my Pre op test. First they were set up for March 4th, and then she called back later and asked if I would mind moving them to an earlier date. WOULD I MIND????? oH Nooooo! I wouldn't mind.. so now they are set for March 1st. I don't have an exact surgery date, but she said it might be the week of March 18th. CAN YOU BEIEVE THAT??? That is only 3 weeks away. (singing) I'm in heaven......Well, I have to climb down off my cloud and go pick up the kids from school. More news to come later. :o)
I'VE GOT A DATE!!!! It's March 13th. That is less than three weeks away. I was instantly jumping for joy when I hung up the phone, but then I got nauseated. I think now that the date is penned in ink, I am really nervous. I am not changing my mind, but a little nervous.
HAPPY DANCING! The mail came today and I got not one, but two approval letters. One from the insurance plan administrator at hubby's company, and one from the insurance company. I am having a much better day today, or maybe my moods will change on a daily basis till the day comes. Who knows? My emotions are all over the place. I am happy, scared, nervous, and impatient all at the same time. Today, I CAN'T wait.
Slight change in plans. I found out today that I am scheduled for an open Rny instead of Lap. Kind of threw me for a loop. I don't deal well with changes that I can't control. It stressed me big time for maybe an hour or so but I am over it now, and still can't wait. I do have to say sometimes my nerves get the best of me.
I am really nervous about tomorrow. Pre op test. A whole list of them including a gasteroscopy.
Well that wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. They did put me sort of out for the gasteroscopy. It was like a dreamy state. I could still hear them talking, but couldn’t feel anything. Then there was the abdominal and gall bladder ultrasound, which was nothing. I also had to have a ton of blood drawn. Oh, and the x rays. Lots of them along with an upper GI. Funny now that all the test are behind me, I am not so nervous. I thought I would be pulling my hair out by now. Only a week and a half left.
Today I got the results of my test. It turns out that I have a hiatel (spelling?) hernia. It is very small though and they say it will get smaller with my weight loss. So that is no problem. I am anemic though, and will be getting some super iron pills to take until surgery. I also have gall stones that are a quarter of an inch in size. So the gall bladder has to go. The psych evaluation was a breeze. I had to take a two part test. One part was some difficult but not impossible puzzle type questions. Like numbers that you had to find a pattern in and complete the series. Also some word puzzles like that. Then there were the three hundred true false questions. Those were mostly things that you just had to read slowly and take your time with but not hard. The end result is that the psychologist says I have a 130 to 140 IQ, am "very intelligent" her words now I have proof. Well adjusted normal person. I never wanted to be normal, but I guess I will have to live with it. So that is a go too. Now I am all done except for my day before admissions at the hospital. I am so ready.
Well the time is almost here. Day after tomorrow. I went into high speed nesting mode and have cleaned everything from ceiling to floor. I even vacuumed the walls. OK DID THAT SCARE ANYONE ELSE? It scared me. A
Well I made it. I haven't asked why I did this yet. I got up and walked this morning for the first time. That was really tough. That morphine pump is a wonderful thing, but not so good when I got up to walk. It made me feel loopy, kind of dizzy. I actually walked four times today and but not easily. They weren't kidding when they said my staples would be from my bra line to my belly button. You don't really realize how much you use those tummy muscles. I am not really in any pain; they are very vigilant about pain management. My surgery was at 11am and took three hours with one hour spend in the Recovery room. My husband laughed at me after surgery. I told him before hand that I would be right back, and then when they wheeled me in the first thing I said was, I told you that I would be right back. I had no concept of four hours having passed. I was already on the morphine, and also had two small tubes going in near my incision that were putting a slow drip of Marzicane (spelling). My Doc said it was like the stuff they put in your mouth when you go to the dentist. It is a surface numbing medication. So my incision doesn't hurt at all. Dr stoner says that will stay in till the day I go home.
Boy things are so much better today. I asked that they take me off of the morphine pump and drip. They gave me Toridal for pain. I feel much better, like I have my brain back. Walking is getting easier, but I am pushing too. I want to go home. There is one other lady here who had surgery the same day and is not pushing to walk..It doesn't seem like they are rushing her either. I thought the nurses would be pushier too. By the middle of the day, I was changed to the liquid pain medication that I will be sent home with. It works great, but wipes me out. Also be prepared for when you system kicks back into gear. I had tons of gas. Enough that it kept me awake at night rumbling through my system. I also got something to eat today. They are really prepared here at Trinity. With the exception of my soup, everything has protein added. The juice, Jell-O and pudding. It is all also sugar free. They also only brought me splenda, butter buds, and Mrs dash with my meals. I have really stumbled on a gold mine by having my surgery here with Dr Stoner.
Wow Saturday already. time is flying by. I am going home today. Woo hoo. I have to tell you one thing though. Not much about all this has been painful because of all of the medication but prepare yourself for when your Dr takes out that drain. It will make you wonder what else he pulled out too. My doctor ordered a shot of Toridal before he took mine out. I was grateful.
My first full day at home. I have to say it is no easy task eating what you need to, and getting water in is really hard. I only got in 16oz today. I did eat all that I was supposed to. I had my first dumping sensation. It was hell. I took some children’s Tylenol. It tasted sweet, but I really didn't think about it because this is what my surgeon suggested. I knew the second it hit my system that I was in trouble. It lasted for about an hour and a half. I was crampy, sweaty, and queasy. I have an apt with him on Tuesday, and will ask him. Other than that, I am doing great, and getting in all my walks.
March 19, 2002
Well another day behind me. I had my Dr's apt. today. Everything is looking good. I was right, I dumped on the children’s Tylenol. Boy don't want to ever do that again. Also he took out half of my staples and will take the other half out in two days. I was shocked when he told me that. I thought I would have those staples at least long enough to get attached to them. I will still be wearing the binder that I got at the hospital. I seriously suggest asking for one. It will make life so much easier when you get home. It's like a girdle that you wear around your middle. Keeps those tummy muscles in place and holds them in till they can heal. All in all it was a good day. I am having some trouble craving things that I can't have yet, and those Flintstone chewable are NASTY! I am choking them down like a good girl.
Well I saw Dr. Stoner again today. He took out the rest of my staples and replaced them with steri strips. Every single day gets better and better. Still no problems eating. I am now moving from liquids to soft foods. Like canned fruit and veggies. I am also eating some baked chicken chewed very well of course. I think I am having such an easy time of it because of my dietitian. She suggested that I not try to get in all my water or protein at first. She said my goal for the first week should be 20 grams of protein and 32 oz of water. Then the second week start working up to 64 oz of water and get in 30 grams of protein. She said by the fourth week I should be up to 100 grams of protein and that should be my goal everyday for the rest of my life. She said that is what all women should get everyday not just us, but that it is more important for us. Also during the first two weeks she suggested that I use slim fast powder (less sugar than ready made and more protein)to get some of my protein. One scoop per 8 oz of skim milk per day the first week equals 13 grams of that 20 gram goal. Then the second week two scoops to 16 oz of milk. She said after that I could try some other supplements. Thank God for Dr. Stoner and all his staff. They have made this process so much easier.
Wow, I'm almost two weeks out from surgery already. Time seems to be flying by. Things are going very well still. I can't imagine them going any better. I ate some gumbo over the weekend. A very modest amount of course. It is so funny how little makes me so full. I did eat a tea spoon of rice with it. I thought I was in heaven. I think the biggest thing to remember is to take new things in moderation until you know how they will sit in your pouch. I did cause myself some trouble yesterday though. I had to try to some bread even though I knew I shouldn't. It made me feel awful. It was toasted and I only took two bites, but it stayed stuck in there for hours. I won't be doing that again soon. As far as eating what I am supposed to though, things are going well. Funny how one thing taste really good to me one day and the next I can't stand it. I don't recommend going out and buying a bunch of what you think you will like.
My stomach muscles are still really sore, but that won't change for a while. Today is the first day I haven't worn the binder, and been comfortable. I am still not sleeping well, just can't seem to get comfortable. I haven't had any real pain at all since leaving the hospital. Anyway, to make a long story short today is a great day. I feel 100 percent better than yesterday and expect tomorrow to be the same.
WOO! HOO! Today I am three week post op. I am feeling so much better than last week. No more binder and I am sleeping extremely well. Every thing seems to tire me out so much though. I have had some trouble eating. They were little things though. I have learned that I can't eat sugar. I can tolerate it in very modest amounts though. Like one night my family was eating peach cobbler. You know I just had to have a bite or two. I ate two bites, and it was just fine. Well that wasn't good enough for me so the next night I thought I would have just four small bites. Turns out those two bites were perfect and four almost killed me. I am exaggerating of course, but I felt that bad. I was nauseated and crampy, with sweats. Eeewwwww! I don't want to do that again. We'll just call that a lesson learned. Other than that, I am eating what ever I cook for my family for supper which consists of a protein, a starch and a vegetable. I fix theirs on a dimmer plate and eat mine on a desert saucer. LOL! My hubby teases me and tells me not to eat it all before he gets some. Speaking of my DH, he has been wonderful. He has been here for every little thing. He even took care of me when I was dumping and didn't say I told you not to have that last bite.... which he did actually say. I don't know what I would do without him or this site. Oh, I have had some trouble the last couple of day with spitting up just clear bubbly liquid. I don't mean to gross anyone out but it's like spitting up clear snot. It's like my food won't go down because my pouch is already full of this stuff. After it all comes up I can eat just fine. I don't know what has my little pouch upset, but I am going back to soft foods for a couple of days to let it settle down again. As per Dr's orders. Well that's it for now, I will check in again next week.
Well I didn't make it back in a week. I have been doing really great. I have gotten my exercise on track and am not so tired all the time. I will be eight weeks post op tomorrow. I had my six week check up with Dr Stoner over a week ago and he says everything is going well. I have been getting in almost all of my protein through my food, and when I don't I have a shake. I did get over that spitting up problem I was having. I think I might have been trying to eat some things to soon. Pork is still not one of my favorite things, probably because it made me sick at first. Oh, back to my check up. I had lost 30lbs at six weeks. I am extremely happy with that. I can't believe how many of my clothes don't fit already though. That just blows my mind. I haven't measured myself to see how many inches I lost, but I will and put that in my next post. I really can't think of anything that I am having problems with just now. I can't seem to eat potatoes, they always come back up. That is pretty much it though.
The really strange thing to me is that I never realized how much I had a love affair with food. I do miss eating for pleasure, but not as much as time goes by. I did have a bought with that dreaded head hunger at about three weeks. I thought I would go crazy. I wanted everything. It's almost like a mourning period for what you have lost. I am glad to have buried it now and moved on though. I think it is also strange how I can take food or leave it now. It's almost as if lunch time rolls around and I think I have to go eat something. It's like one more thing on my to do list for the day. Not something I am living for. I am really enjoying my new life as it is, and know it will get better everyday. See you in a week or so ... I promise.... :o)
Tomorrow I am off to
Well that was an experience. In the South every family gathering revolves around food. My Grandmothers especially kept trying to feed me all the time. Telling them that I wasn't hungry just wasn't working. I had to be really blunt. We also attended a family wedding while we were there. I was more than happy to have just two bites of cake with no icing. I did make a huge mistake though. I took someone else’s word there something didn't have sugar and it almost did me in. I had to leave the reception and go lay down in the chapel. Oh, there is one aunt that knows about my surgery, and is interested in it for herself. She watched everything that I ate while I was there. That was un nerving, but what was really hard is her jealousy. She was always bringing to everyone’s attentions that I wasn't eating as much or making everyone else look like pigs for eating so much more than me. It wasn't pretty. No one really said much about my weight loss either. One Grandmother told me when I had trouble keeping my blouse (that was very much too big) on my shoulder that I could just put it in the back of my closet until I needed it again. I told her I would never need it again, and she said sure you will, that is what your Aunt Eva does. I wanted to laugh but restrained myself.
My Mom on the other hand was asking me what to cook for dinner. She raved about how good I looked. Oh and one of my best friends, Lucie of course told me that I looked fabulous. Isn't it always the women that we are close to that we can depend on the most. Over all it was a good trip.
I did try some new foods, but in moderation. I didn't want to have to explain getting sick to anyone. I tried mustard greens, purple hull peas, oh and crawfish. They were all wonderful, but I really wanted to eat more of the crawfish. By the end of my trip, I realized that the food wasn't so important, it was the visit itself. I mean before, we always planned out our meals practically before we got there. There are so many things that we like to eat that we can't get here in
I have in the last ten days noticed that I am shedding more hair than I usually do. I have long hair so it is always coming out, but more now.
I knew it was coming, and it's here. I started loosing my hair last week. Not lots at first, but then it got to be more and more. Thank God I have thick hair. I know everyone thinks that if you eat perfectly and take your vitamins it won't happen to you, but I am here to tell you none of that makes any difference. Now I know why so many after pictures have short hair. I have cut about five inches off of mine. Just my long hair getting under my shoulders at night was pulling some out.
I had an appt with Dr Stoner today. He says I am doing great. and I don't have to see him again for four months. He said my hair loss is completely normal, and will stop in a week or two. He said it rarely last for more than four weeks, and most of the time for less. He also said it always happens between three and six months post op no matter what you do. I was glad to hear that I was doing everything I could have done though. Now my hair loss has slowed down but still coming out some. It really only came out really heavy for two weeks.
On the up side, I am feeling better then I have in years and doing more than I have in years. I have lost 60lbs now, and have yet to hit my first plateau... Knock on wood... I really at this point can eat almost anything. I stay away from bread all together. I don't like olives which used to be one of my favorite things. I got sick on them early on. I do drink one cup of coffee everyday, and get in all of my water. My exercise at this point consist of moving the yard once a week, working in my veggie garden everyday, Riding my bike three times a week, and walking to anyplace that I need to go in town. I live in a very small town. Oh and I have some three pound weights that I use everyday. I am trying to take care of those bat wings under my arms before they get out of hand. Well I think that about covers it for now. Good luck to all.
I just realized that in case anyone reading my profile wanted to know, I have never written what I eat everyday. Like I said before, I eat three meals a day. I drink a cup of coffee when I first get up at 5sm, then eat breakfast around 6:30 or 7am For breakfast I eat one egg, with cheese or some kind of veggie stirred in. I also nibble some yogurt. For lunch I eat one and a half chicken tenders and some potatoes or rice. (I eat carbs in the middle of the day because they keep my energy up) Then for dinner I eat a meat (pork chop, steak, hamburger steak, ribs) In small portions of course, with a veggie and a starch. I eat all kinds of veggies except for asparagus. Right now I am loving the fresh zucchini and squash out of my garden. I am positively addicted to watermelon. I also get in my entire sixty four ounces of water a day. Not an easy task, but I feel better when I do. Matter of fact it isn't as hard as it used to be. I really don't drink anything but water anymore. I used to be an avid wine drinker, but have put that on the back burner for now. I dump on white wine because it tends to be sweeter, and forget any kind of zinfandel. I can drink red wine, but don't do it very often. Maybe once every two weeks. I can drink beer also but the carbonation fills me up so fast it takes me a whole evening to drink just one so I figure what's the point. Really I guess you have to try things out for yourself, and one bad experience is all it will take to keep you away from something you can't have.
I know I keep promising to come back and update my profile more often, but the fact is that I have so much more energy and spend my time away from the computer. I have had a vegetable garden that I have tended to all summer and spent the last month and a half canning veggies. Something I always did, but I got more done this year with all this new energy.
I haven't been on a scale since the end of July and was down 85lbs then. I am wearing a size 18jeans and an x-lg top. I am more than happy with my progress. I have more good days than bad now and don't dwell on the bad ones as much. The one thing that has me down these days is the fact that I am still losing hair. It slowed for a while and then picked up again. I don't know what that is about. Dr. Stoner said it would stop on it's own around six months post op, and I was six months about two weeks ago, now dog gone it I am ready for it to stop. For anyone who thinks that getting your protein, or water in and taking your vitamins will change that, it won't. I do all of that everyday. I did break down in July and get my hair cut short, that was a shock. It was just a bit shorter than waist length. It is much less of a shock to lose short hair than long though. I have faith though, and know it will grow back when I am ready.
Me again... big surprise. I am two pounds away from 100lbs gone forever. I am so happy with my progress. I am in a size 16 jeans now, and a lg to xlg top. The one big thing is that my hair is growing back. Thank God. I was starting to wonder. I have adjusted well to my new eating patterns, but still am surprised at how little food satisfies me. After all this time, eating what I can and leaving the rest no longer pains me. That was hard at first. I mean deep down, I knew I had a problem but after surgery and adjusting to the way I eat now. I truly know I am addicted to food. Now I eat to live and don't live to eat. I do miss lots of my favorite foods, and still do sometimes make foolish choices. Just last week for instance. I wanted a Krispy Kreme doughnut so bad, I was prepared to get sick in order to have the one doughnut. I did eat one, and it wasn't as bad as dumping at first. I guess that was just the remnants of my addiction taking over. So don't get me wrong, it is not all roses every day. There are still some things to deal with. You just learn a lot about yourself through this process. Boy have I learned more than I ever bargained for. I am very happy that I had the opportunity to do this, and blessed that it has gone so well. As far as eating, I still cannot drink any alcohol. Well I can some, but choose not to. I don't crave bread like I used to, and don't eat much of it. I for the most part don't have any really bad reactions to any food except for sugar. I eat fried chicken, shrimp, French fries, and steak fingers. Pretty much anything goes these days. Oh, not any milk products either. I tried sugar free ice cream. It makes my insides gurgle so much and give me gas that I don't want it. Doesn't make me sick or anything. This week I am going to try some soy milk products and see how that goes. Even with lactaid or something like that I still get the gas and the gurgling insides. Just don't like the way it feels. Anyway, but I do take a multivitamin, calcium, and iron everyday so that isn't a problem. Now that it is getting winter in
I have put this off for long enough. It's been three weeks since I returned from my trip home to
Then off to my Dad's, where the real challenges started. He had no reaction what so ever when he first saw me. My Mom had even driven over with us because she wanted to see his reaction. She just knew it would be huge. Well, turns out she went for nothing. Later when she was gone and we were just sitting around and visiting he started with how good I looked and didn't stop for the next three days. It was really weird since he hasn't given me the time of day since I became a teenager. He even fired me from the family business once because I was on a diet and had lost 50lbs and then stopped there. He said he needed attractive people working for him. All the other women in the office were thin. I was only about 240lbs then. It was always like I embarrassed him. When I lived out of town and would drive over to see a friend and want to pass by his work and see him he would say I will meet you outside at the car. Anyway he has always treated his friends kids better than me or my brother so it was hard for me to take all this attention from him. He spent three days taking me to the store with him and showing me off which really made me mad. I thought I will just let it go, it is Christmas and it's only three days. Then the big bomb shell. He couldn't leave it at that was the best Christmas we have had in years, he had to mess it up. He called me at my Mom's house the day after Christmas, to tell me how much he enjoyed spending time with me, and then went on to say how different I am now and how much better my attitude is and how that made it so nice to have me there. Can you say blew like a ten pound bomb. I was past mad. I guess I should have said something when he was on the phone, but I was so shocked that he was saying that to me all I did was sit there and listen. I was so quiet that when he got done with his little speech he was saying hello, Hello.. You still there? I just said yes and the conversation was past short after that. I haven't spoken to him since. I don't know if I want to. The only reason that he thinks that I am different is now that I am thin he actually had a conversation with me that he paid attention to. It's like now that I am thin I am worth getting to know. So now after all this time he wants to get to know me, if he had done that before he would know that I am just the same. Well, so after that I ranted and raved around my mom’s house for at least an hour. My Mom, Husband and Children bless their hearts listened and just let me get it off my chest. OK, getting off my soap box now. All I have to say is people who think we are not worth getting to know because of our weight are losing out big time. Oh, just one more thing about dear old Dad. He is feeling a bit guilty looking down at his own big belly now that I am smaller than him he thinks he needs to lose weight LOL! Which is funny cause he has always been overweight himself. Oh, OK, last thing about being at Dad's. The first morning at his house I put on my jeans, and they were looser than they had been the week before so I went and got on the scale. I had lost seven more pounds which put me at 105lbs lost. I screamed so loud the whole house heard me. That was the best day.
I spent the next week between my mom’s house and my best friend Lucie's. That was great. Lucie is another one of my greatest fans. She was happier than I am if that were possible that I have lost so much. She had tons of questions. We have battled out weight together for years. I think she is interested in surgery, but not ready yet. She went in her closet and gave me a whole ton of her skinny clothes. I don't need to do any shopping now for a long time. I got everything from dresses to jammies. I had the best time playing with Lucie's son, Our God son. (Almost 2 yrs) The most fun thing was that he got one of those blow up ball pits for Christmas, and I could get in it with him. That was a huge
Then off to my FIL's house for a couple of day. He was so funny, because he never said anything about my weight. He just attributed to having babies. He took me just as I was. When he first saw me, he gave me a huge hug and when he let go said "I have to back up and do that again, I missed half of you the first time." I thought that was so funny. He said I looked better than good. For a man, that is a good compliment.
So all in all it was a great trip, and very good for my ego, except for that Daddy thing. I still haven't talked to him, but decided that I needed to, to clear the air so to speak. There are just no words for how infuriated I was that he actually said that. I know it is due for the most part to his ignorance. He probably thought that was a real compliment.
Since our trip I haven't lost a single pound which is driving me crazy. I can't wait to get to that under 200lb mark. That has been a major goal for me from the beginning. I can say that for the first time in 15years that the weight on my driver’s license is correct though. At almost a year out from surgery though, I know I am eating more bread and things like that because I can, and need to go back to the beginning to get my weight loss started again. Plus it is a miserable winter here in Iowa in the single digits with no snow for the last few weeks. I haven't even been out walking so I need to get back to exercise too. On the up side I have been working with free weights and finally have those bat wings under my arms under control. Now I just can't wait to reach my goal of losing 50lbs more and getting that tummy tuck. Loose skin is depressing, not as much as hair loss but still. Anyway, that is my tale of the triphome to see the family. It was mostly good. Hope your holidays were nice as well.
February 12, 2003
I just wanted to write a little note about an experience I had yesterday. It was so odd. Most of us know we have a distorted image of what we look like. I did, and well still do. Before I l
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Before & After
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