The Path of Least Resistance
Apr 19, 2009
Dr. Duct Tape
Apr 09, 2007
This is a story about what happens when a very independent woman is put into the hands of two MEN. I had an LBL in November, 2006. Let' s just say that due to some hormone issues, I swell more than the average bear. So, after my first bath,when I go to put my binder back on, the swelling got so bad that the velcro wouldn't keep it closed. My DH panics and calls my PS. I couldn't believe what this man told DH to do to fix it. He said...wrap her in duct tape!!!! So here I am holding the binder together while he is going around and around with the duct tape. Problem was, he put it soo tight and high on one end....I ended up where I could only breathe out of ONE lung!!!! Do you how much it hurts to breathe out of one lung when you've been cut around your whole body?.....MEN!!!!
Anyway, the following week I'm sitting there nekked on the table while PS is examining my incisions and I thought about it. So I slap the crap out of his arm and I yell at him....YOU told my husband to wrap me in duct tape!!!!!! And he says....What's wrong with that? I said...I'll tell you what's wrong with that! All I have on is this robe and under it is this big wide white belt that's duct taped together with three drains coming out of my kootchie with bulbs that look like hand grenades pinned to the belt. I LOOKED LIKE A SUICIDE BOMBER!!!!! If I were in a mall and opened my robe...People would have been running for their lives!!!! He calmly walks out of the room and I could hear him talking and everyone is cracking up laughing down the hall. Then he comes back in the room and nonchalantly asks me if I want to get one my drains out! Now. people I don't even know smile at me everytime I go to his office. He told me last time I was there that he still tells that story to everybody he knows. MEN!!!!
Anyway, the following week I'm sitting there nekked on the table while PS is examining my incisions and I thought about it. So I slap the crap out of his arm and I yell at him....YOU told my husband to wrap me in duct tape!!!!!! And he says....What's wrong with that? I said...I'll tell you what's wrong with that! All I have on is this robe and under it is this big wide white belt that's duct taped together with three drains coming out of my kootchie with bulbs that look like hand grenades pinned to the belt. I LOOKED LIKE A SUICIDE BOMBER!!!!! If I were in a mall and opened my robe...People would have been running for their lives!!!! He calmly walks out of the room and I could hear him talking and everyone is cracking up laughing down the hall. Then he comes back in the room and nonchalantly asks me if I want to get one my drains out! Now. people I don't even know smile at me everytime I go to his office. He told me last time I was there that he still tells that story to everybody he knows. MEN!!!!