novlette

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Have you ever seen Disney's Mulan where she wonders why her reflection is someone she doesn't know? I look at myself and I can barely take pictures of myself or stand to see myself in the mirror. The funny thing is I was able to give birth to a beautiful baby boy with an amazing sense of humor. I want to be beautiful but honestly I don't know how anymore. I am not really sure any more what beauty really is. I thought that maybe it was the way you treat people or maybe it's the ability to keep giving when you feel you have nothing worth giving. It reminds me why I want this operation for myself to move with a freedom I used to have or better so that I can enjoy my time with my little man:)Last friday I popped a hose off my truck rendering it undrivable so to say the least it's a rush to put it back together so that I can sell it. I am still determined that I will be able to do it no matter what but forking out 300 bucks on a truck your just gonna sell SUCKS! Thought that I would put that out there it just eats cornflakes people! I can't wait to be on the other side of the coin where i can tell you guys about what I ate and get some food advice so ready the advice list because once my truck is sold I am sooooo gonna need it. Take care and hope to hear from you guys soon


Novy:0)

Well it seems while I am just concerned about getting to Tijuanna the rest of the world is concerned that I am gonna die. Better yet they are mad because they don't get my son. Good Grief. I could die driving home in the 3 ft of snow on the roadway or freeze to death in weather that has been at -40 for the last two weeks. Life is risk! This is a big risk I know but staying where I am is a risk I am not willing to take. Why should I have heart failure first anyway! I can't believe a friend got turned away for being 265 pounds doc said he was too heavy are you kidding me! So hear I am if your looking for support I am so down honestly I can't imagine how anyone can do it with no support so don't be surprised if I send you a friend request. I just need to know that there is light at the end of the tunnel!

Ok so now all I have to do is sell my truck to get said money for surgery then I have to hand in my passport application and then I am set. Dr.Kuri's team have been nothing but sweet to me they have kept in contact and I am in such good hands. People ask me if I am nervous but I am not really I think once I am on the plane I will be poopin my pants a wee bit but other than that there is no way I am going to change my mind. I feel like I am in control and that I have a bright future ahead of me for once in my life thank GOD!

It looks as though I have found the Dr. who will be doing my surgery. I have heard from word of mouth all the way back here in Canada that he was amazing and the cost seems to be a 1/3 of the cost Canadian Surgeons cost. Sooo I am gonna sell my truck eventhough it's -40 degree weather and brave it from here on in to get this surgery done. I am supposed to excercise anyway so really at the end of the day what is a little more walking gonna hurt right? Well stranger things have been known to happen wish me LUCK!

Turns out my referral to Dr. Mitchell was not gonna happen because he did not recieve the funding yet for the lap band procedure. The program that he runs in our province was shut down from 100 to 25 surgeries per year and they had met their quota already so therefore the only thing I can do now is go to another province/country and have the procedure done and pay out of pocket a small fortune to have it done!!! I have never been to mexico and I can't afford to go back every time I need a fill so I have to get it done in Canada. Here in Alberta where the province pays for the procedure it will cost 9,900 dollars. To got to Ontario it is gonna cost me $16.000 dollars but the fills can be done here in Calgary???????????? WTFFFFFFFF! I am frustrated. What do I do now?
me

I got the referral to see Dr. Mitchell  on wednesday just to find out that he doesn't have funding for the surgery yet. I got the referral from my gastrointeroligist guy, I could have Kissed him I was so Happy..... Then his office called to tell me the surgeon he knows doesn't do the operation I want!!! I feel like I am gonna die early if I don't get the operation. All I can say is that I am gonna need a lot of prayer on this one and hopefully things will work out for the best.