nymbis
Like everyone else out there...I too...have been overweight since a child. Was teased by my father, boys at school and later even adults. I have been on every diet in the book and found one that worked for me THE FIRST TIME. It was the Medifast liquid diet. Was the worst choice I ever made. Notice that I said it worked for me THE FIRST TIME. Yeah...I went from 170 to 126 in 4 months, then gained all of it back plus more. After that first time I was never able to get back on it again and it ruined me. ABSOLUTELY ruined me. I would say...okay...Monday I am starting back on the Medifast. So Sunday I would binge like heck and come Monday evening...I couldn't stand it and would quit. I did this for years. Never being able to forget about how fast I lost the weight the first time. Wreaked havoc on my metabolism, and my recovery from eating disorders!! I was pissed that I ever even heard of the diet!!! It's left me at a really unhealthy weight.
My self esteem????....NONE really! I have very little confidence in myself, and am constantly searching for that something that will comfort me. That's why the FOOD! Food was what was there for me when my innocence and trust of others was taken away from me as a child. It was an unconditional love. Something that could calm me and in a way, make me feel safe.
Well, I am TIRED of living my life like this...UNHEALTHY...TIRED ALL THE TIME...NOT BEING ABLE TO DO THE THINGS I WOULD LOVE TO DO...SECLUDING MYSELF FROM MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY. BUT most of all...I cannot be this way any more because I have a 4 year old beautiful daughter who needs me to be an interactive mom! So I am doing this for myself, my health and MY PRECIOUS daughter!
