onherwaytofierce

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HI Everyone.

It has been 7 months. I went from 270 to 180. Thats 90 pounds people. Thats insane. I am happy, kinda. I did not go to any support groups or anything but really think I am going to start because the emotional side of this whole thing is not easy. I went into Forever 21 the other day to see if I could get into any junior sized clothes and could not help but to feel like people were wondering why such a big girl would be in a store like that. Am I nuts?? I am between a 12 and 14. I feel like a humongosaur (a big monster on my sons favorite cartoon). The mental just hasnt caught up with the physical. Has anyone else experienced this? I had more confidence in a 22 than I have in a 12. Isnt that the strangest thing? Dont get me wrong,  my experience has been positive. I do not regret this decision for a moment. I just wish I had dealt with some of the emotional issues surroundling my weight upfront arther than sitting here feeling crazy and everyone wondering why Im not ecstatic that I am no longer huge. But when I look in the mirror I dont see what everyone else does. I still see a size 22 girl.  Somebody please recommend something for me!!

7 days out. I have had close to NO pain! Im not even taking the pain meds! Dr.Poplawski has magic hands!  Protein shakes are gross. I want to chew up something and actually swallow it. I need a pedicure.  Every fat person should do this. Its great. OK its not great all the way. I really never realized how addicted to food I was until now that I cant have any. That part really sucks. BUt the good news is...........Im onmywaytoFIERCE!!!! ANd nothing tastes as good as that looks and feels. See ya in the skinny girl section! HOllA!

I am home now. I am glad that I did it. I havent had a lot of pain.  I am a little overwhelmed at the though of subsisting on liquids only, but we'll see.  It was so quick and easy. I am still shocked.

I am so excited...and i just cant hide it....Im about to lose control and i think i like it!!! mmmm hmm!!!!!

I got approval today! I called in and they said ever so casually, "Mam, that was approved three days ago."  WHAT!!!!!! I wanted to scream out loud at work when i heard it. God is so good!  I just need a surgery date and its on and popping! 

So of course my authorization was denied for a really stupid reason. UHC claims they never got the medical documentation even though Barix has record of sending it four different times.  Now it has to be appealed which can take up to 30 days.  GARBAGE i tell you! I think they just deny people to see if you won't ask again. Its probably a money saving technique these insurance companies use. So my 30 days will be up on MAY 7. We'll see what happens next.  

I went to Barix on on 03/06/08 for the seminar and consultation. I am sold. Im ready to have the surgery today.  I wanted to take off my clothes and put on one of those hospital gowns right there in the lobby of Barix clinic. "Ok, take me away!" It isnt quite that simple though:(  Barix sent a request for authorization and that is what we are waiting on. All that they require is 5 years of weight history with a consistent  bmi over 40.  I thought that was funny because I can give them 20 years history of that if they need it.( I am only 29 years old) lol.  They told me that approval usually only takes 2-4 weeks and I should have it soon and then they will schedule me. Their insurance department told me that if all goes as it typically does, I should be scheduled for June or July. When I heard that i was not encouraged because that is a long way away and I really want to be down 40 plus pounds by my 30th birthday in August.  Being fat really sucks. Waiting on approval sucks too.