Self-hatred?

Jul 03, 2009

A couple of posts on the VSG board have gotten me thinking today.  I've realized that many times when I make a post, I find myself going to the same places- wishing I was "normal" and talking about what a "freak" i am.  One member made a comment in a post about the ammount of self-hatred she sees on the boards.  Even if she didn't mention or intend me, I'm certainly one of those people.

I have been severely overweight my whole life.  I really feel that I missed out on a normal childhood because i was so alienated by my peers.  It wasn't just the weight, but that was a huge factor.  When people at school, in your family, in public, everywhere put you down your whole life, it is bound to effect they way you percieve yourself.

Why does it effect some people more than others?  Why is it that people like me take the external negativity and turn it inward, until it becomes the truth?  And why can others just let it roll off thier backs and say, 'well that's your opinion, but it's not my truth'?

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