rock_lobsta
The Weighting... is the Hardest Part
Jun 10, 2008
"How much of human life is lost in waiting." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
My apologies to Tom Petty....
I'll say it bluntly - Waiting sucks!
It's been a little over a month since the first seminar. Got my packet all completed, did a lot of research, got my questions together, and even went to a second seminar.
Yeah, I'm a little pumped up. I'm still trying to lose weight on my own, and it's coming off steady.
Just one little issue. It's kinda ironic.
I can't lose much more weight until my first consult with my docs. I can't get my BMI under 40, or there's no chance I'll be eligible for surgery. That's right - I've got to quit losing weight. How crazy is that?
The long wait does have its advantages. I did learn that Lafayette General Hospital is not that great of a place, and I'm glad that I'm not having my procedure there. I had a chance to really look at docs in the area (hence the second seminar in BR). I learned that the retail price of my MS meds would run about $22,000 a year - thanks to ins, I'm only shelling out $100 a month. Whew!
Since I can't afford to lose more weight right now - I can splurge on occasion. Should I lose weight over the week, I take a few meals off the next week. Once I get my weigh-ins done and clear insurance, then I'll be able to really take off the gloves. I'd like to be under 300 by the time I have surgery.
But until then, the wait - and the weight - continue.
My apologies to Tom Petty....
I'll say it bluntly - Waiting sucks!
It's been a little over a month since the first seminar. Got my packet all completed, did a lot of research, got my questions together, and even went to a second seminar.
Yeah, I'm a little pumped up. I'm still trying to lose weight on my own, and it's coming off steady.
Just one little issue. It's kinda ironic.
I can't lose much more weight until my first consult with my docs. I can't get my BMI under 40, or there's no chance I'll be eligible for surgery. That's right - I've got to quit losing weight. How crazy is that?
The long wait does have its advantages. I did learn that Lafayette General Hospital is not that great of a place, and I'm glad that I'm not having my procedure there. I had a chance to really look at docs in the area (hence the second seminar in BR). I learned that the retail price of my MS meds would run about $22,000 a year - thanks to ins, I'm only shelling out $100 a month. Whew!
Since I can't afford to lose more weight right now - I can splurge on occasion. Should I lose weight over the week, I take a few meals off the next week. Once I get my weigh-ins done and clear insurance, then I'll be able to really take off the gloves. I'd like to be under 300 by the time I have surgery.
But until then, the wait - and the weight - continue.
Why?
Jun 06, 2008
"Who am I? Why am I here?"- Adm. James Stockdale
Part of my information packet that I received at my first seminar had a series of questions as to why I am looking into bariatric surgery to lose weight. I'd like to share my responses...Q: How does living with severe obesity affect your daily living?
A: Physically, my weight affects my mobility and endurance. I am distinctly limited in the amount of physical exertion I can do. I am also diagnosed with asthma, sleep apnea and recently multiple sclerosis. I sleep poorly, fatigue quickly and have trouble moving about.
Socially, I am reserved and keep to myself. I prefer to avoid social situations due to the negative attention I draw. In addition to my excess weight, I also sport a clearly visible incisional hernia that is even more noticeable than my girth. I do not have many friends, nor do I feel confident that I can make any.
Mentally, the effect of repeated and failed efforts to lose weight has a depressing effect on confidence. Although I continue to try living healthy, the thought of losing a pound a week and keeping that trend for two years by attempting the same failed means is overwhelming. I used to smoke and drink - and I was able to take control over those habits. However, I cannot control my weight with the same determination.
My family life is affected most of all. As much as I want to go out and do activities with my son, I find it difficult to do so. There are so many things to do around my house, but I lack the physical ability. I would like to share more intimate moments with my wife, but it is very difficult to do so.
The problem with severe obesity is how it permeates every aspect of a person's life. Mine is no different than anyone else's.
Q: Why would you like to have bariatric surgery.
A: I have started my latest weight loss attempt in January. Since then, I have managed to lose 25 pounds at an average rate of 1 pound per week. At this rate, it will take another two years to reach my goal of losing 125 pounds. I have tried time after time to lose weight, only to regain the weight plus more. Bariatric surgery may be an extreme option, but the less extreme options have been ineffective. I am encouraged with the success rates of surgery, and many positive experiences from others have reinforced this opinion.
Q: What do you expect your life to be like after bariatric surgery?
I expect my life to be different - and hopeful. Different from the life I have been living, and hopeful to rid myself of the prison I have kept myself in. I hope for the day to be active with my family and be energetic again, hope to carry the success of weight loss into other areas of my life, and hope to live the life I was meant to live - to share it with those I care about most.
Just an ordinary day - for a change...
May 28, 2008
“The ordinary acts we practice every day at home are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest.” - St. Thomas More
Woke up late for work this morning. I just couldn't manage to get myself out of bed once the alarm went off. Had to hit snooze about 5 times before I finally decided to join humanity. As usual... Took my meds and vitamins, fixed my meals and snacks, and drove Sammy to his day camp.
Decided to take the scooter in to work today, rather than drive the truck. It's been a solid week since taking the bike out of the garage - for me, that's an eternity. This may seem odd, but riding the bike is easier than driving. Just feels more natural.
This was just my second day back at work since the first lumbar puncture (and the subsequent headache from hell). I spent my day at work yesterday assuring people that I'm feeling well, and explaining the finer points of spinal taps and blood patches. Today, I was able to put together a productive day.
Wednesday is bowling night. Usually, Sammy tags along for 'Guys night out' at the bowling alley, but his Friday taekwondo class was rescheduled for tonight. Bummer. He's as much a part of the team as I am, and he was missed. This was the last night of our league until August, and we were just bowling for fun. I'll miss bowling night, and so will Sam.
Only when I got home did I realize just how normal this day was, and how long it has been since I had just a regular, ordinary day.
What I typically dismiss as routine and mundane can be quite comforting - and special.
Woke up late for work this morning. I just couldn't manage to get myself out of bed once the alarm went off. Had to hit snooze about 5 times before I finally decided to join humanity. As usual... Took my meds and vitamins, fixed my meals and snacks, and drove Sammy to his day camp.
Decided to take the scooter in to work today, rather than drive the truck. It's been a solid week since taking the bike out of the garage - for me, that's an eternity. This may seem odd, but riding the bike is easier than driving. Just feels more natural.
This was just my second day back at work since the first lumbar puncture (and the subsequent headache from hell). I spent my day at work yesterday assuring people that I'm feeling well, and explaining the finer points of spinal taps and blood patches. Today, I was able to put together a productive day.
Wednesday is bowling night. Usually, Sammy tags along for 'Guys night out' at the bowling alley, but his Friday taekwondo class was rescheduled for tonight. Bummer. He's as much a part of the team as I am, and he was missed. This was the last night of our league until August, and we were just bowling for fun. I'll miss bowling night, and so will Sam.
Only when I got home did I realize just how normal this day was, and how long it has been since I had just a regular, ordinary day.
What I typically dismiss as routine and mundane can be quite comforting - and special.
When Life Gives You Lemons...
May 25, 2008
“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” - Martin Luther King, Jr.
"Mike, it looks like you have Multiple Sclerosis."
Well, now that explains why I suck at Guitar Hero.
I was pretty good at it until late January. I just chalked up to a little fatigue and the realization that I was no virtuoso on video games anymore. No problem.
I guess it also explains why I dropped things easily. I just chalked that up to clumsiness. I never claimed to be the most coordinated person in the world.
I started to realize I had a problem when I couldn't flex my left bicep anymore, and my left hand would just hang limp at the wrist. In fact, I lost most of my strength in my left hand and arm. Later, I began to notice that I was favoring my right leg when walking. Putting weight on my left leg would cause me to lose balance.
I was starting to notice a pattern. Then, one day as I brushed my teeth, I noticed my smile was slightly crooked. Left side, again.
About two weeks ago, and after dealing with this for over three months, I went to the neurologist to see what was happening. After much poking and prodding and a couple of hours in an MRI, I got the initial diagnosis.
MS... Well, at least it wasn't ALS. Gotta make Lemonade.
Later that day I was in the hospital for a lumbar puncture. Some people may know it better as a spinal tap.
Spinal Tap is a psuedo-fictional band and movie. A lumbar puncture is the prelude to what I would call Seventy-Two Hours of Hell.
A post-dural headache is the seemingly harmless term when every time you sit or stand up, someone smashes your skull with a sledgehammer every five seconds until you wise up and lay the f**k down.
Finally, I had enough and got back to the hospital to get a blood patch. For the uninitiated, you get a large syringe of blood drawn while the doctor is puncturing your spinal column (again). Then your blood is injected into your back. Don't ask me how it works, but it does - almost immediately. Amazing.
This past week gave me a few insights:
1. There is not enought hyperbole in the world to describe just how amazing my wife is. Marrying her was the smartest thing I ever did.
2. I couldn't ask for better friends. Especially you, Vampi.
3. In 9 years, Sammy has had to deal with more adversity than many people have their entire lives - and he does so with grace and kindness. I'm so proud of my Pooker!
4. Life's pretty good. I need to enjoy it more.
"Mike, it looks like you have Multiple Sclerosis."
Well, now that explains why I suck at Guitar Hero.
I was pretty good at it until late January. I just chalked up to a little fatigue and the realization that I was no virtuoso on video games anymore. No problem.
I guess it also explains why I dropped things easily. I just chalked that up to clumsiness. I never claimed to be the most coordinated person in the world.
I started to realize I had a problem when I couldn't flex my left bicep anymore, and my left hand would just hang limp at the wrist. In fact, I lost most of my strength in my left hand and arm. Later, I began to notice that I was favoring my right leg when walking. Putting weight on my left leg would cause me to lose balance.
I was starting to notice a pattern. Then, one day as I brushed my teeth, I noticed my smile was slightly crooked. Left side, again.
About two weeks ago, and after dealing with this for over three months, I went to the neurologist to see what was happening. After much poking and prodding and a couple of hours in an MRI, I got the initial diagnosis.
MS... Well, at least it wasn't ALS. Gotta make Lemonade.
Later that day I was in the hospital for a lumbar puncture. Some people may know it better as a spinal tap.
Spinal Tap is a psuedo-fictional band and movie. A lumbar puncture is the prelude to what I would call Seventy-Two Hours of Hell.
A post-dural headache is the seemingly harmless term when every time you sit or stand up, someone smashes your skull with a sledgehammer every five seconds until you wise up and lay the f**k down.
Finally, I had enough and got back to the hospital to get a blood patch. For the uninitiated, you get a large syringe of blood drawn while the doctor is puncturing your spinal column (again). Then your blood is injected into your back. Don't ask me how it works, but it does - almost immediately. Amazing.
This past week gave me a few insights:
1. There is not enought hyperbole in the world to describe just how amazing my wife is. Marrying her was the smartest thing I ever did.
2. I couldn't ask for better friends. Especially you, Vampi.
3. In 9 years, Sammy has had to deal with more adversity than many people have their entire lives - and he does so with grace and kindness. I'm so proud of my Pooker!
4. Life's pretty good. I need to enjoy it more.
Starting Out
May 13, 2008
“Let your mind start a journey thru a strange new world. Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be...Close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you'll live as you've never lived before.” - Erich Fromm
Last week, I was able to attend a Weight Loss Surgery seminar with my wife. Like me, she is also considering surgery in hopes of losing weight where diets have failed. We took in the information provided, along with the presentations from the professionals that may wind up being our weight loss team.
Weight Loss Team - I never thought of it in this regard. Since the struggle with my weight began, it has been a modern-day Battle of the Bulge - a series of counterattacks against a relentless and superior foe. I'm outmatched and vastly outgunned. This time around, my wife and I will be working with a team. It's nice to have some extra help this time around.
Today, I scheduled the first appointment with our dietitian and surgeon. It's more than a month away, and I'm looking forward to it. There is a ton of information and research to process. I haven't decided on which kind of procedure to have, but thankfully the time to make informed decisions is there.
Until next time...
Mike
About Me
Lafayette, LA
Location
28.1
BMI
Apr 27, 2008
Member Since
