Bill I.

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It's amazing (not in a good way) how similar my current job(8 yrs) and my marriage(13 yrs) seem to parallel each other these days.

Both relationships were two sided exchanges for the first year with high hopes and promises for the future.  I keep the faith and keep sacrificing, keep trying to fix what's wrong, and nearly killing myself to make things work and survive.  Progressively both relationships have gone to completely downhill since then so both my employer and my wife just seem to take and take and take.  With no regard at all they're takiing everything I have have and complaining that I don't have more.

There's no growth, just neglect and stagnation and I'm so incredibly tired.

yahoo?

OK, so my calcium was a little low and B12 a little high, however everything else was in range. 

WOW.  Thought I'd be way off on something or another.

Pretty much the same as 1 year post op. 

Currently very late getting labs done, but I should be able to make an appointment in a week or so.

Useful change can be really hard.

One way or another.

I found this on Amazon web site - it probably can be found elsewhere too.  I'm only halfway through the book and every page seems to describe my wife and I in scary level of detail.

The Sex-Starved Marriage: Boosting Your Marriage Libido: A Couple's Guide
by
Michele Weiner Davis
 

Too much stress, not enough exercise.  I've been able to bring my carb count down to stop any gains, but it is difficult to get much more than the minimum protein in a day.

I'm sore and a bit tired but the filter is now gone and I am glad.

Also received some of my actual bloodwork results numbers from last months test (one year surgiversary).  When I checked out the cholesterol and triglyceride results against norms I had to say a big WOW.  These are all really LOW numbers.

LDL 56 (ideal = less than 100)
HDL 50 (ideal = 60+ but 40 to 60 is OK)
Cholesterol "total" 119
triglycerides 67 (ideal = less than 150)

My zinc level is indeed too low and I've now added extra zinc supplements to my daily pocketful of vitamins.

I was told to cut my vit A in half, but now that I'm seeing the result I honestly don't understand why.  I was taking 20,000 iu and was told to cut it back to 10,000 but my lab result shows a 346 in a safe range of 325-780.  (unless maybe vit A interferes with  zinc absorbtion)

I dropped another pound or 2 it the past few weeks but still mainly hovering at 250.  Folks that know me have commented that my body shape is really changing though, so there's still hope that I will get substantially closer to goal before my honeymoon window closes.

The big news of course is that I go in for surgery to remove the IVC filter tomorrow.  It should be a simple outpatient procedure, but it could fail if my body has fused too badly to it.  Plus I have an allergy to the contrast dye which makes it a little more risky for me than for most others.  Basically I was told there are pros and cons to leaving it in vs taking it out and there isn't enough long term data to show a clear logical choice.  I hate the idea of having any foreign metal or plastic devices left inside me indefinitely so I'd rather it be out.

I've started doing more serious workouts on a treadmill recently too.  Not sure if it's helping yet.

I also need to find a shrink and see about antidepressants.  I've been fighting depression for 20 years and I think I just need some kind of help if I'm going to have a chance at winning the war.

Haven't checked in here for a while,  mainly because I haven''t had anything to report.  I've been plateaued between 255 & 260 the whole time.  I know plateaus/stalls happen so I'm not particularly worried about it yet.  I think my numbers will start changing again any time now.  

I really don't think I'm done because it is just too soon - and I still have plenty of excess flab on my belly & legs.  I know that I will end up with some excess skin hang on arms, legs, and around the waist unless/until I get PS.  Already showing the signs, but I don't think I'll mind too badly if I can make it to my goal (onederland).

I do see the image in my mirror keep changing bit by little bit.  Sometimes it's hard to put a finger on each change because they're so gradual and because they haven't affected my scale # or pants size.

I shaved my face shortly after my last post and have kept it clean since then.  Last time I kept a clean face for more than a week was 2 decades ago, so I really don't know the face/person that I found under the whiskers.  Still not really used to it.

One year surgiversary is 2 weeks away.  A few days after that I'll go in for my one year checkup and labs.  I'm really good about taking my vits but my exercise routine of walking daily has been punctuated to maybe 3 days per week.  Blood thinner makes it really hard to stay warm while walking in the winter and I haven't been able to afford a continuing health club membership (that will be changing soon and Spring is coming).

A week after that I will be seeing the vascular guy about scheduling IVC filter removal again.  The docs wanted to try in NOV but I was already out of sick days at work then and it was impossible to find someone to drive me home from the appointment.  Plus the vascular guy said it didn't matter how soon they tried since it had already been in much longer than recommended and the IVC situation would not change any over those few extra months.

Happy birthday to me!

So my weight has been kinda plateaued for a couple of weeks but I woke up today and am down 2 more pounds.  What a nice surprise. 

I've been at the same waist size since Thanksgiving, so any weight lost is not coming from there.  All the pants with a tight waist are very loose in the legs though, so maybe it's coming off of my thighs a bit.

Went away for the holiday weekend so I didn't have a scale for those days.  That's probably a good thing as I definitely use the darn thing more than I should.  I'm a worrier with an overactive imagination so I stress over way too many things.

I constantly do my best to avoid simple carbs but I'm still not "counting" carbs.  I am down 140 lbs from surgery date at 9 1/2 months out.

Small wow moment - shoveling snow is a whole lot easier than it was last winter!