vodkadetox
well hello, my name is Shelese and im recently 23 years old and 6 weeks post op of gastric bypass. honestly, i've been overweight generally my entire life. at some point i gave up and just felt like i was just destined to be fat. of course i've tried everything in the book but i was losing my battle with my food addiction. i felt like it was the thing that had a huge hand in my manic depression but oddly was the only thing that would make me feel better. in elementry school my weight amongst other things got me noticed and an easy target for bullies but i stayed focused on my studies. here is where i learned to store my anger, sadness and pain all in a bottle. then as i got older going into jr. high the teasing got extremely worse my self esteem was shot to nothing but i still gave it the ol college try. even though i was miserable at this point i still managed to make it there but my grades were slipping and my focus was fading. the more they talked the more i held it inside and ate. by the grace of buddha i made it to high school and here is where things became difficult for me. freshman year i couldn't turn a corner without someone pointing at me or humiliating me in front of others for a laugh and i couldn't take it anymore. i began to ditch school on an almost daily basis, i became very anti-social, drugs werent just an expierement anymore, very suicidal, and begun to cut myself.. but crazy thing, I KEPT EATING! you would think i could be smart enough to just fix the problem instead of starting my life off on the wrong track. keep in mind no one really knew how i was feeling or really knew what was going on in my world. sophmore year was no better. things just kept getting worse even at a new school. so basically i went through this torture that we call high school at 4 different schools and battling my own demons inside.. it wasnt easy at all. on my 18th birthday i decided to drop out of school and things just spiraled from there. i've gotten better at masking my emotions and covering up the things i was really doing behind those who knew me knowledge. started getting into the wrong crowd and yes still blowing up like a balloon.. by the end of 2011 i decided it was time for a change after going to my doctor and finding out i weighed 363 pounds! 363 FREAKIN POUNDS!! so she suggested that get into the program for gastric bypass. at first not everyone was on board with this but i was on my very last straw. at this point im going back to school and cutting back on things i shouldn't have and now here i am with alot of blood sweat and tears im evolving into a better person and 1 month post op of gastric bypass.. it's hard work but i would never regret my choice for doing this.
